SOS, Girl wants to get married after a week, please help, I'm South Indian..

[Canadien]

k, I might have to blame myself for this or do I?

I will reveal the big problem in point forms to get you guys through time line..

#1) I sign up to matrimonial website at shaadi.com

#2) Girl Contacts me on 24 April, and I accept..

#3) It seems she pre-selected me, as we share the same last name, and in India its the only way to get married, and she wants to come to Canada off course, which I have no problem with..

#4) She seems very much infatuated with me, and gets excited real fast, has great credential, really smart girl, she already told her parents about me, wow, lol...

#5) I talk to her three times, but a lot and the conversation has gone as far as she's asking if I love her or not, and if I'd marry her, and how soon, ouch for me, especially knowing all this DJ stuff..

#6) There was no need for any DJ techniques, and now she wants to make future plans with me, and I'm open to it, still I just came back from India, and don't plan to go back at least until two more years..

#7) I would very much like to find someone for marriage and even she might be that girl, but how do you guys react to someone so abruptly and spontaneously coming into your life, and wanting to get married?

#8) She wants to talk to me now everyday, and there are other guys coming to ask her for a hand in a marriage, still, she wants me to answer this, and says its up to me to decide, WOW, talk about pressure..

#9) So what would don juan do?

Please guy understand that I've studied, and know more material then many startup DJ's, and this is a real big problem facing me now, so far I told her that I like her personality but am standing my ground in terms of becoming totally infatuated, so how would you handle this?

 

[wolf116]

but how do you guys react to someone so abruptly and spontaneously coming into your life, and wanting to get married?

It's never happened but I'd tell her I'd like to see what she's like in bed first, then tell her it won't work out unless she is into threesums and supplies a girl.

Problem solved.

 

[Real_Deal]

Find the eject button and press it NOW. In other words IT'S A TRAP RUN AWAY!

 

[PeeGee]

lol wolf, way to ignore the cultural norms.

A girl who wants to be married asap sets off red flags in my head. What is she after? Quick move to Canada and a better life perhaps?

As for you, joining a matrimony site means you are wanting to settle down. However you're getting cold feet as well? What is it you want?

 

[Mavrick]

Um, you're culture is different than American culture. I'm not really that familiar with what's customary in India for things like this, but from where I'm from, it's a big no no. It's time to run like crazy. There is no way you should marry a woman that you don't even know. Being married isn't so important that you'd give away your whole life for one chick that you don't even know.

So, tell her you'll have to get to know her first or run like hell.

Oh, I just realized you're living in Canada. Ok, then RUN LIKE HELL!!!!!!!

 

[PhatE1vis]

Sounds like she's hunting for a green card to me. I'm not saying it couldn't work out because all kinds of arrangements do, but just know it's not love if that's what you're looking for.

 

[My Name is Nobody]

well let's see a picture of this woman before you discard her.. if she is hot enough maybe I'll marry her.

 

[Canadien]

Oh, I know

Sounds like she's hunting for a green card to me. I'm not saying it couldn't work out because all kinds of arrangements do, but just know it's not love if that's what you're looking for.

and there seems to be a pattern here, as I noticed that girls back there get married when they're 21, and guys at 25,..

I'm turnning 26 next week, and I noticed that I'd have a chance at real high quality girl from India, as I'd pretty much have sets of girls lined up for my picking, as I am Canadian, and have strong social connections back there..

So there is inverse relationship here, as in India my value drops as I grow older, and its at top notch right now, while my value grows as I grow more mature and older down here in Canada, and as of now I'm stuck in between the two, WOW, its good position to be, yet still a lot of pressure...

What position would you guys pick? Would you choose to marry your dream girl, if she came to you, today?

 

[MrLuvr]

You signed up for a MATRIMONIAL site. Do you know what that means? It means that people on that site are looking to get MARRIED. Not to mess around. You are Indian, don't act like you don't know the culture. If you weren't interested in getting married right away, why the hell did you put your profile on a MARRIAGE SITE??!

 

[Canadien]

Ok so I'm sending you guys link to her

well let's see a picture of this woman before you discard her.. if she is hot enough maybe I'll marry her.

and my pics head to head, how would you guys rate me against her?

http://picasaweb.google.co.uk/prash.gandhi/ShaadiPics

Click on pics to view them..

What impressions do you get from my pics? One is with my mom, and another is with my brother and a cousin..

 

[My Name is Nobody]

and my pics head to head, how would you guys rate me against her?

http://picasaweb.google.co.uk/prash.gandhi/ShaadiPics

Click on pics to view them..

What impressions do you get from my pics? One is with my mom, and another is with my brother and a cousin..

She doesn't seem that hot what's her body like?

 

[MrLuvr]

and my pics head to head, how would you guys rate me against her?

http://picasaweb.google.co.uk/prash.gandhi/ShaadiPics

Click on pics to view them..

What impressions do you get from my pics? One is with my mom, and another is with my brother and a cousin..

You are not gonna be able to do better than that.. marry her.

 

[Po-Coordinator]

You have to take into context the different cultures. I am not Indian but I do know that arranged marriages are the norm, and many people get married really young.

I would say, if you really care about the girl but don't want to get married right now. Just say, "I am at a time in my life where I need to secure something financially, but I really want to stay in contact with you (or you could say be with you)"

This way, if she really cares about you she would understand and wait. If she just wants a green card, then she will get really upset and threaten to leave you. (P.S. if she does that...call it off).

 

[Bible_Belt]

I don't think she's very attractive. Where are the full-body shots? I suspect she may get fat at at early age.

Many Indian women are beautiful. You don't need to settle for one who is not. There will always be Indian girls that you can meet in person in Canada. You would also share a lot in common with them, knowing both cultures. The more acclimated a woman is to North American culture, the later she will get married. Don't feel as though you are in a rush.

I knew two Indian girls from law school. One was tiny, petite and hot. The other was simply beautiful, could have been a model. She married a med student and I went to her wedding - a thousand people, all day in a very upscale hotel, probably cost $120K. Her dad died when she was an infant, and her mom came to the US with nothing, then went to night school to become a cpa, then worked hard at her job with all of her goals being for her daughter. Now her daughter is a lawyer married to a brain surgeon. I thought the guy would be four feet tall, but he's the tallest Indian man I've ever seen, probably six-four.

Family is very important, and marriage at an early age is common in Indian culture. My ex-wife is part Indian, and there is a lot of Indian influence in much of the Caribbean. However, the difficult part of the getting married early is that Indians don't believe in divorce. I can understand feeling pressure over the decision.

 

[Maxtro]

A couple of things confuse me. First of all do you really want to get married? Are you ready to get married? Do you really think she is that attractive, your dream girl? Why did you go to Canada if you are only interested in Indian women? That's the same thing as me going to India and only looking for white girls.

BTW I don't think she is that attractive. This is a hot Indian Teesha Lobo. More pics.

 

[WesCottII]

and you've been here since 2006?

Jesus, it's not rocket science. JUST SAY NO.

Men don't have "sos'", or crisis', we just fucking get on with it.

 

[Canadien]

I know but

and you've been here since 2006?

Jesus, it's not rocket science. JUST SAY NO.

Men don't have "sos'", or crisis', we just fucking get on with it.

I went to India just for two months, and liked how close the families are back there, and how different the culture is back there, and would like to make a permenant connection back there, as I'd very much like to enjoy two parts of world in one life time..

And I've been experimenting with every possible chance to lead a happy life, as I try DJ, nice guy, intellectual guy, family guy and every possible scenario to see what brings me the ultimate happiness; but still with experimenting comes the excruciating stage about learnning new things about yourself and others that you weren't aware of before, and I'm in this stage of learnning my world around me by putting myself out there, as I'd like very much to be loved and lost then to have never played with the possibility of looking for that special someone..

I'm ready to take the hit, and fail miserably, then to accept what others say, and accept it as ultimate truth, I know this will hurt lots of people around me, but still I'm still playing with my fututre, and like everything else I take, this will be yet another new adventure that will give me lessons that I'll learn a lot from..

 

[WesCottII]

Chirst on a bike buddy. You don't need to tie into a life of misery just to have an adventure.

Looking for someone to love them has lead many men down a ruinous path. Look before you leap.

 

[Canadien]

I just found something I found interesting in other forum...

Experience say ....

In hindu community Couple Are made by their parent on Earth and then after couple life get screwed up ... they never celebrate....

Below is how couple are made....

[1] From which religion you are?

[2] Do you belong to our caste?

[3] In that also due belong to the same sub-caste in which we belong?

[4] what is your mother tounge?

[5] How much you earn, what is your CTC ... coz i have proposal for my daughter who earn round about .....that much?

[6] What about your horoscope ? is it matching with my daughter. Do you have mangal in your kundali? .....(In my case that never matched with any gal.. boys truthness dose'nt count lot ..... but kundali matters lot..... )

[7]Who are there in your family ? how much you have to give money to your father? (In short What all other responsibility you have?)

[8] Gal in love will force boy to marry as early as possible coz father of gal don't want her daughter to stay unmarried coz she is burden to him... he just want to get rigd of his daughter ... on other hand gal in love will pressuriez his boy friend..... she will not even give time to talk to boys parent... she will come with things that ,,, my dad are looking for me and he saw one boy who is rich ,,having his own house car ,,, all sorts of luxrious things.... so ultimately gal will marry some one with money not with someone who love them.

[9] Boys side will ask female father how much Dowry you will give to my eligible son...? and rich dad will buy groom for his daughter by doing that ...

[10] Gals parent will ask In Which City you are working ? coz I will prefer boy working in same city where my daughter work...

[11] Boys will say gal,..... we can marry each other you can stay and do your job in your city... I will meet you every saturday and sunday .... (Boys Back of mind ==>know money is important)

[12] Biggest problem Gal will say no to every boy when she will be young .... and when her age will grow she will come to conclusion that marry any one otherwise she has to leave alone.... so she will end up with jerk selected by his parent or the boy who select them ... they don't have any choice.... coz after marriage they have to do what their hubby say.... In love with their boyfriend before marriage .... they will have lot desire and boy will die full filling all this and at the end ... she will put every thing on destiny... some idiotic reason to break up....

Fact is ...........

Manzile bhi uski thi,Rasta bhi uska tha.
Ek main akela tha, Kafila bi uska tha.
Sath-Sath chalne ki soch bhi uski thi,
Phir raasta badalne ka faisla bhi uska tha.
Aaj kyo akela hoon, Dil sawal karta hai,
Log to uske they,Kya KHUDA bhi uska tha

Conclusion :- Marriage are made on Earth only and that by parents ... couple never celebrate... they just stay together for sake of society....

It's me Single
Sunilkumar

 

[jcap]

she's actually quite good looking....

7 to 7.5 , or even a 8

don't know what the other dumbasses on this thread are saying she's not that good looking.

hopefully thats not her best of the best pic lol airbrushed and all.
you know how pics work....