My Workshop with Sorin at the seaside
In 2006 I had done a workshop with Badboy (
www.badboylifestyle.com), where I learnt some fundamental lessons. The most important one was that I realised (at a profound level, not at the logical one) that it is the man's duty to make the first step and that you have to persist and to read her bodylanguage and not listen to what she is saying (example: "No" with a wide smile and shiny eyes).
I used to do indirect approaches, and I thought that Direct only works very rarely and with a lot of luck. But I was more of an actor than an authentic man. And on many occasions it was quite difficult to pretend that I was high-energy and to really manifest myself by using stories and particular routines. It was forced and not natural, and I think that's what affected the long-term effect (or the lack) of Badboy's Workshop.
With Sorin I met in the train station in Bucharest, Romania where we were supposed to take the train to the seaside. On the way there we talked and got to know each other. He told me what his philosophy is regarding girls and pickup. But I still couldn't imagine how direct could work so well.
On the first day we got a little rest from the long journey, we established what our goals for the workshop were, goals related to my lovelife. On the first evening we went out into the seaside resort to feel the energy, to see how things were. At one point I went into a club where I received an Indicator of Interest from a cute girl that took a seat right next to me (on my right). There was plenty of space around but she chose to sit next to me. I felt that but I didn't have the courage o talk to her in a direct way. Sorin who was on my left kept pushing me COME ON, USE THE OPPORTUNITY!! But I hesitated too much and the girl when back to her friends on the dancefloor.
Sorin told me: "Go directly at her right now, right there and tell her that you like her, right there next to her friends!" I bit the bullet and I went to her. I walked between her friends and I whispered at her ear that I like her and I want to get to know her (there was loud music) She reacted very well!! She was happy that I came to talk to her! I could see her eyes shine. I isolated her to where she sat initially, then isolated her again somwehere else where we could hear each other better. (Sorin was signalling me to do all this behind her back). She was a little shy, and I was a little tensed, otherwise our interaction would have gone a lot longer way. After 20 minutes I ended the conversation and I went off.
I was shocked at how good Direct worked and how easy it is! No fake stories and too much hassle.
We took a good rest and the second day Sorin gave me the theoretical part of the workshop with exercises to discover what my values were.
He explained to me how connection between people works but I needed practise to really understand it.
We went down to the beach, took a short swim, we cooled down our brains from all that learning and we went out again in the evening. He gave me a demonstration when he went to talk to a girl who was in the middle of her social group. He went passed all kinds of AMOG's (guys
wanting her attention) and all sorts of obstacles until he got her number, and the girl was clearly interested in seeing him again.
I did a few approaches, some better than others, but I was still tensed...
On the third day we practised day-game more. I was afraid to approach girls on the beach, but he showed me again that it is possible.
Wondering about the place I tried to do indirect approaches but after the experience I had with direct, it seemed stupid to lie the girl straightface, as if she doesn't know why you came and talked to her. I then tried Direct on uglier girls to which I felt no attraction and it didn't work. I clearly felt the fact that it's obvious that I was lying and that I don't really like them that much in order to get to know them... They felt that as well and it didn't work.
Walking by I observed 2 very beautiful girls and I told him that I'd really like to talk to those girls... But they had already gone passed and I thought I had lost the opportunity. But again he pushed me from behind and told me to approach "sideways" while walking with them...
With a wide smile and very authentic interest I told them that I liked them and I want to get to know them and then I introduced myself straight away and their reaction was amazingly positive. They seemed 2 unapproachable girls who thought highly of themselves, and the boys that were passing by were just looking but didn't dare do more. But they were very open to my approach and I talked a little with them.
Again I wasn't able to relax properly and go into true rapport with them as I should have, so I ended the interaction graciously after 5-10 minutes. I almost felt that they wanted more and they wanted me to lead them properly, and they wanted us to connect on a deeper level.
This experience motivated me a lot and again it was a clear demonstration to how well direct works. Getting better and better, I evolved and I felt that I could go and talk to any girl I liked, to see what she was like and see whether we clicked or not (which of course is part of Sorin's philosophy)
We spent the evening with 2 girls that were accomodated right next to where we were and which we had met the day before. We had some alcohol together and we had fun all 4, and then just 2 of us - it was nice.
On Day 4 of the workshop I was already good with rapport and I was quite relaxed in order to take the interaction a longer way with the girl I liked, the next step I had to do was kino (touching).
In the evening, at the club, I saw a group of girls on the dancefloor, one of them was really beautiful (taller than me,etc), that no one dared talking to. I took a few breaths of fresh air and I went directly to her, I turned her over to me and I told her I liked her and I wanted to get to know her. Again, an incredible response, and despite several "mistakes" which I then did, she gave me her attention and was very receptive to me.
On Day 5 I was doing approaches on the beach with a lot of ease and I talked many tens of minutes getting to know girls. Sometimes I would get phone numbers and I'd set up dates, other times I didn't but unfortunately I had to leave the next day and I wasn't able to follow up with those girls, I prefered to meet other new girls instead.
The last evening was exceptionally good, beautiful girls everywhere, incredible energy all around, and I was able to meet them, and with some... even more...
I then met some friends that came to the seaside, and I spent the evening with with a girl, in my room, while Sorin was kind enough to understand and let us enjoy the room by ourselves.
In the morning at the train, we both were parting in different directions. We said good bye like 2 very good friends (which we became during those 6 days). I was very satisfied and this experience changed my mentality and attitude regarding "the art of seduction" and pickup
altogether into a much more healthy mentality and a lot more beneficial on the long term:
One should approach because one likes the girl not in order to train oneself, not to get rid of "fear of approach" but for the only fact that you think the girl is beautiful and you want to get to know her, and you're doing your duty as a man to see whether you're good for each other or not, if there's a "click" between the two of you, or not...
The workshop with Sorin, didn't just show me the what and how about connecting to a girl (and people in general) on a profound level, but it also opened me up as a human being, it gave me an honest and authentic confidence, something mroe profound, not just that workshop high, that boost of confidence after the workshop only.
Now I am able to go up to the girls I like, despite any approach anxiety I may have, which doesn't disappear but we just have to get over. You can do 9999 approaches until you feel no fear of approaching, but in a week's time (or even the next day) you will feel it again. I am able to lead the interaction and escalate, to meet new girls and develop a relationship with the ones I feel good with and get along with, the ones that have the values I am looking for...
The mentality in the seduction community in general is that if you practise enough, you will be able to have ANY woman, you will be able to manipulate her and make her yours. I had simillar thoughts but the philosophy I learnt from Sorin is much more healthy and beneficial on the long term. You don't have to go out and approach 4 hours a day and do 100 approaches to become good. If you want, you can do that but I'm sure not everyone will feel good or will have the necessary energy to do that. On the other hand, when you're just walking down the street and you see a girl you like (a situation that happens to me very often, and I'm sure that a lot of people get the same thing...), you just go up to her and you are able to lead the interaction as it's all supposed to be... THAT'S PRICELESS!
Jean 20, France
