"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Son of a *****! L_JBF

Wubbman

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Mother****er, I just got off the phone with her.

Me: "Lets go do something Sat. afternoon."

Her: "I was meaning to talk to you about that. Why don't we just be friends."

Me: *Totally unexpected* "Oh, uh ok."

Her: "Are you sure?"

Me: "Yeah, thats fine. Bye."

I guess there wasn't much I could have done. I don't really have any intention to be her friend, (certainly not her emotional tampon), but what else could I have said? I'm not too torn up about it, but it kind of stings. It probably was for the best though. She and I are in several organizations here at college, so I guess I was sort of "****ting in my own backyard." Still... :(
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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LordBrian

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Originally posted by Wubbman
Mother****er, I just got off the phone with her.

Her: "I was meaning to talk to you about that. Why don't we just be friends."

Me: *Totally unexpected* "Oh, uh ok."

Her: "Are you sure?"

Me: "Yeah, thats fine. Bye."
This is how I would have handled it.

Her: "I was meaning to talk to you about that. Why don't we just be friends."

Mr: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH

Her: ?

Me: Wow, you just took a load off of my chest. Im so releived.

Her: what do you mean?

Me: Well, its just that I was trying to figure out a way to tell you that I just wanted to be friends, but I didnt want to hurt you either. I wanted to, you know, let you off easy.

Her: oh..... uhhhh...... ok.....

Me: see you later!

See? that takes balls because it can backfire. however, if pulled off right, it will increase IL.

Dont worry about it man. I've made way worse mistakes... beleive you me. :eek:
 

Wubbman

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Lol. That would have been nice, but I had just asked her if she wanted to do something Saturday. It wouldn't have exactly worked. At least she didn't lead me on though.
 

DJnomore

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Originally posted by Wubbman
Mother****er, I just got off the phone with her.

Me: "Lets go do something Sat. afternoon."

Her: "I was meaning to talk to you about that. Why don't we just be friends."


Next time say something like this...

You: "Somehow it doesn't sound appealing to me is that really what you are looking for? "

You: "you know how would you feel if I was telling all my friends you were just a ****. or only around for sex?"

You: "But I value your friendship, tell you what...Lets flip a coin....heads its just sex....tails its just friends.....or would you rather part like adults now and not see each other again?"

I promise you if you used that (which I never have in those words" she will remember you and tell ALL her friends and their IL in you will go up. But who is ready with that when they hear LJBF?
 

Fadero

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Damn, that surely is a stinger. No way in hell I would remain friends with this girl. Delete her number from your cel phone, remove it completely from your life and don't ever entertain her by answering any of her future attempts to call you.

Last thing you need is to be in her line of emotional tampons for whenever she is having problems with the new dude who is boinking her.

Save yourself from the initial beginning to one-itis, and never believe a girl who has LJBF'd you, giving you false hope throughout your friendship and stringing you along forever.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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JustDoItAlways

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Way, way too often, we guys take what chicks say literally.

When a chick says: "Let's just be friends."

What she means is: "I don't want to be your girlfriend. I don't want to date you."

She is not saying "Let's go out for coffee and to the movies and have girly-talks and go shopping together at least twice a day."

She is just saying she is not interested. Move on.
 

PUA_GUY

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Originally posted by Wubbman
Mother****er, I just got off the phone with her.

Me: "Lets go do something Sat. afternoon."

Her: "I was meaning to talk to you about that. Why don't we just be friends."

Me: *Totally unexpected* "Oh, uh ok."

Her: "Are you sure?"

Me: "Yeah, thats fine. Bye."
Should have at least reframed it this way:

HB: Lets just be friends!
PUA: Ive already got friends, cya!

This way you keep your dignity and next her on the spot.

Dont worry about her bro, one chick less to hassle ya, and she didnt waste your Saturday!
 
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Shouldn't have ended the convo with, 'ok'. Should have said that you have enough friends and you don't want 'girl' friends. Or stated that, "A friend is a dollar in my pocket, and you are neither currency nor can you fit in my pocket" so we'll it at that! Good bye.

Just do it - we know what the intentions of girls are when they say that...but its good to throw such a false statement back to them with a sneer!
 

Jay Fiedler

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I dont get it. Did you want her to just come out and list all of the reasons she didnt want to date you? Would that have been better for you and for all the guys here saying shes a ***** for saying that? Is she supposed to date the guy even though shes not interested just to save his feelings?

Its not a sin for a girl to not be attracted to you. She wasn't...big deal. Happens to everyone. Saying lets just be friends is just a polite and simple way for someone to tell another they are not interested romantically. I'm sure all you guys have done it to girls.

Quit being so sensitive and taking everying so personally.
 

OddTech

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I thought you did fine. There isn't much you can say or do. After awhile, it's too much effort to be creative and make those cool come-backs. There is no need to contact her anymore, move on to someone else.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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B9

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Re: Re: Son of a *****! L_JBF

Originally posted by LordBrian
This is how I would have handled it.

Her: "I was meaning to talk to you about that. Why don't we just be friends."

Mr: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH

Her: ?

Me: Wow, you just took a load off of my chest. Im so releived.

Her: what do you mean?

Me: Well, its just that I was trying to figure out a way to tell you that I just wanted to be friends, but I didnt want to hurt you either. I wanted to, you know, let you off easy.

Her: oh..... uhhhh...... ok.....

Me: see you later!

See? that takes balls because it can backfire. however, if pulled off right, it will increase IL.

Dont worry about it man. I've made way worse mistakes... beleive you me. :eek:
What kind of sh*t is that? Nothing but a display of vanity (not just vanity, but deceptive vanity - for losers only) to try and get the last word.

She obviously doesn't have the IL to be proper dating material and as such should be dumped anyway. That she did it before you is just the way it goes. Trying to increase IL by deliberately misrepresenting yourself may give a temporary boosr of IL(and it may not), but in that case, you may want to ask yourself what the point of dating her is in the first place.

Lord brian's post is a classic example of putting the p*ssy before yourself. NOT clever!
 

ManOMan

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I like DjNoMore's approach. Instead of making a sign of disinterest awakward, just play it off like it was no big deal (instead of saying! HA!! I was just joking! What a relief! )

You could have even said something like "by friend, do you mean strictly sex and no dates?"

or exaggerate her view by jokingly saying "But I am DESPERATELY IN LOVE WITH YOU!! I think of you night and day!! I cant bear to just be friends with you!"
 

princelydeeds

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I would say in the calmest voice imaginable, "If thats what you want then fine, I will live with that." Then I would say "Thats not what I want, but if thats your decision so be it. " Then I would let her go and not call her for a long time.

I've learned that when you have been really decent with a woman she will usually come back. It may take days, weeks, months or years but sooner or later she will come back. I always want to take the high road because when she comes back around she will look at you and say, "what was I thinking?!"

I moved back to Pittsburgh in June, after living in Florida for the last 10 years. I constantly run into chicks I haven't seen since high school. I can bone almost every one of the chicks who dismissed me so long ago. No, doesn't always mean never alot of times it means not right now.

Take the LJBF as a sign that you need to continue improving yourself. When next you meet you will be so much better than you are now, you will be too good for her. Treat her like you dont even remember that she LJBF'd you. Don't be petty, just be fun and exciting. Keep living your life and improving yourself and I guarantee things will change.
 
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