"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Sometimes I don't know what to do with my life

SayWhat

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Some of you might remember I've landed a job which pays me double what is average in my country. I love what I'm doing, but it makes me do longer hours, I have none flexibility, I get holidays when they tell me to get holidays (this changes in a few months as it just some kind of training period now).

But this last part is eating me up, my friends get of much earlier and can take holidays whenever they want. I'm just stuck there from 8-16h 6 days a week and it will get worse as there have been talks of working 20 days in a row. They even go on holiday in a week where I don't have holiday (they've gotten an offer from another friend to stay at a holiday home in another country for free and it was just that week so I don't blame them, it's a great opportunity, I would have done the same).

But it annoys the hell out of me, I've always been a guy who loves the sun, to have a drink with friends on a terrace with a sunset with some nice lounge music in the background and the fact I'm going to miss out on this holiday, uch.

For my work I'll probably have to move as well. It's only an hour drive and when I don't have to work I will come back home, but I'm afraid of all the missed opportunities I will have because of this.

Like I said, I love my job, but perhaps not enough to make these sacrifices. Nothing comes easy in life, but this just ain't worth it. I think I'd rather earn less but have more spare time and flexibility.

Another thing that adds to this and is probably the main cause for these feelings is the fact that there is no one that wants to hear from me, to know how my day was, that says come let's go for a drink, to just sit in the couch with or outside. Yes woman are not the solution to my happiness, I have to seek it in myself. But even a thrilling hobby and going to the gym regularly doesn't change a thing...
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Serenity

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My philosophy is: It doesn't matter if I earn a lot of money if I don't have any time to enjoy what I've worked for.

It's really your choice, but any life choice that makes you unhappy I would say is a bad choice. However, if this changes in just a few months then I'd endure it, because long-term that makes the job a good decision. You may not feel like it's worth it right now, but try not being short-sighted and you'll see that a few early sacrifices will be worth it.
 

RangerMIke

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You have to make sacrifices to get where you need to go. If work keeps you from doing the things you USED to like doing in the past, my advice to you is to find some things you can do with the schedule you have. Be creative.

I have three businesses I run... I can honestly say that my schedule has not been my own for a month.... worked every day, traveled for a solid 2 weeks. But I always find time to do Yoga at least 3 times a week from 5:30 to 6:45 AM. And at least ONCE a week go on a long 20 mile bike ride. I also find time to go out with a women at LEAST once a week. You just have to figure out what you can do and fit it in.
 

Julian

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Nothings permanent dude. Do this temporarily. Think of it as a bootcamp of sorts. Set a end date to your job, say 6 months. In the meantime save and stack as much cash as possible and focus on working out and getting jacked.

After 6 months re evaluate your situation. If not happy you should have enough $$$ to move or do whatever you want, vacation, build social life etc.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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SayWhat

Senior Don Juan
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I feel I am in a bootcamp for the last 4 years (since I discovered this site) and nothing has changed, in fact I feel it has become worse. I discovered this site due to a girl who I became good friends with but ultimately lead to nothing. Since then I didn't even had a female friend.
 
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