"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Someone Teach me How to Walk

Flint Stoner

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2005
Messages
23
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
New York
Hey guys,

I've been having kind of a strange problem for the last year or so. It's kind of hard to describe, but, whenever I'm walking somewhere in public by myself(at the mall, work, etc..) I tend to feel really awkward. Like, as I'm walking, I don't know how to 'naturally' swing my arms, or how to keep my posture natural(not too upright, and not too slouched). It kind of feels like the whole world is just watching me walk. I've been told it kind of looks like I'm strutting by some people, which I don't know is a good or bad thing. Then by others I've been told that I 'walk funny'.

The strange thing is, if I'm at home or with friends and I'm walking I have absolutely no problem. Could this be like an social anxiety problem or something?


Fred
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

Dingus

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 27, 2004
Messages
85
Reaction score
0
Age
45
This is really natural for people that are really self-conscious. People that have good self-esteem and are a confident person it becomes much easier. It's also a sing of anxiety. I used to have this all the time and still have episodes when it occurs. Just try to take a deep breath and realize you're actually walking completely normal. It's similar to panic attacks where you think that everyone around you can tell that you're nervous and anxious when in reality they cannot. Interesting post though. I would love to hear some more knowledgable comments on the subject.
 

Dingus

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 27, 2004
Messages
85
Reaction score
0
Age
45
You're so nervous and anxious about making a good impression that you're thinking about every movement you're making, which in turn makes you feel that you're awkward because walking is usually second-nature to you. The best way to avoid this is learn not to focus on your moter skills. Like what athletes do so they're not thinking about their movements, but rather the actual task at hand. Golfers visualize the the flight of the ball but as they swing they clear their mind of what is going on with the body. When you think about your swing as you're swinging it usually comes out feeling strange and a bit off. It's all about being prepared and having the confidence that your body's actions will take care of themselves. This confidence comes from practice. You obviously have a lot of practice in walking so just be confident you're doing it right or even better.
 

Flint Stoner

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2005
Messages
23
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
New York
It's kind of like a nervous 'tick' or something. If I'm walking in a straight line from point A to B I have to be doing something with my hands - like cracking them, fiddling with my wallet, reading something. I've noticed I'm more relaxed if my hands are in my jacket pocket.

I think I may try video taping my walk to get closure on what looks/doesn't look messed up.
 

Climax

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
2,329
Reaction score
5
Stop worrying!

Just think to yourself that you are walking in your own back garden, just walk natrually, be yourself, and dont give a damn about what others think. Simple.


Laterz...
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

griffon65

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2005
Messages
154
Reaction score
1
Easy. Its all in your mind. First thing you wanna do is think of yourself as the center of attention. Your the man, everyones looking at you not to judge you but to admire you. Walk in a slow pace, this will automatically make you more relaxed. Dont swing your arms too much just enough.

Dont look down at your shoes, look at people. When someone is walking straight towards you try to look at their eyes in a relaxed manner. Dont walk like your in the military, casually look at people that are walking by, make eye contact. Practice in the mirror and analyze your own expressions.
 

MacDiddy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2004
Messages
1,070
Reaction score
2
Location
Down South. Between the Y junction.
It's a sad state of affair when this forum begins to attract this kind of posting...... and equally some dudes willing to reply....

Its got very little to do with seduction.... and this guy clearly has a problem which his local doctor/psychiatrist could fix....
 

Climax

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
2,329
Reaction score
5
CONFIDENCE!

Originally posted by MacDiddy
It's a sad state of affair when this forum begins to attract this kind of posting...... and equally some dudes willing to reply....

Its got very little to do with seduction.... and this guy clearly has a problem which his local doctor/psychiatrist could fix....
His problem is a problem that has to do with
confidence, which is a vital ingredient in the process of seduction... hence making this guys problem a SoSuave issue too. If he gets enough confidence to WALK with confidence, then he is 1 step closer to being able to approach women, with confidence.


Laterz...
 

MacDiddy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2004
Messages
1,070
Reaction score
2
Location
Down South. Between the Y junction.
His problem is a problem that has to do with confidence
I'm not a mind reader and neither are the majority.... maybe if you posted something like "I keep scratching my ass, how do I stop... its a confidence issue" I might take you more seriously...

It seems that a guys ultimate goal is to find a mate... so anything leading up to that can be deemed relevant despite being so Fcking trivial??? You gotta be kidding me!!!!

Maybe we should have a subforum title "Quircky behaviour"
 

griffon65

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2005
Messages
154
Reaction score
1
Originally posted by MacDiddy
It's a sad state of affair when this forum begins to attract this kind of posting...... and equally some dudes willing to reply....

Its got very little to do with seduction.... and this guy clearly has a problem which his local doctor/psychiatrist could fix....
Way to take his post out of proportion..... He never asked about "how to walk to attract more women" He just wanted to learn how to walk more comfortably. Walking is a social skill just like talking, he needed to improve it so he got some advice. Theres nothing sad about that.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

DjDreamer

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 6, 2003
Messages
574
Reaction score
3
Age
47
Location
3rd rock from the sun
You want to know how to walk? Walk with a sense of purpose...walk with style...walk with confidence...

That's all...
 

MacDiddy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2004
Messages
1,070
Reaction score
2
Location
Down South. Between the Y junction.
Way to take his post out of proportion.....
Every post gets the same level of "fair go" from me....

To cap things off, his problem goes beyond style, so the correct and BEST place for his problem is not on this forum but in a clinic where he can get proper treatment. I just don't see how this forum can fix it...
 

DjDreamer

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 6, 2003
Messages
574
Reaction score
3
Age
47
Location
3rd rock from the sun
MacDiddy you're right...his problem is beyond style...he has to develop good bodily rhythm before he can establish a style...

Flintstoner I bet you don't dance...I bet you don't jog...I bet you don't do anything with your feet that involves intricacies of rhythm...
 

MacDiddy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2004
Messages
1,070
Reaction score
2
Location
Down South. Between the Y junction.
It's not a medical problem
Duh!!!!

Thanks for stating the obvious.....I suppose everyone thought that he had to go to the doc and have his legs put in a sling.....

Now grab your crayons and go to the corner and draw something...
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

omizzi

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2005
Messages
49
Reaction score
0
Age
40
Location
Chicago
MENTAL--------PHYSICAL
PHYSICAL--------MENTAL
MENTAL--------PHYSICAL
PHYSICAL--------MENTAL
MENTAL--------PHYSICAL
PHYSICAL--------MENTAL
MENTAL--------PHYSICAL

MENTAL AFFECTS YOUR PHYSICAL.... THINK ABOUT IT. IF YOU'RE HAPPY, YOUR FACE HAS A SMILE OR YOU WALK WITH MORE ENERGY.
IF YOU'RE SAD, YOU FROWN. WHAT YOU NEED TO TAKE CARE OF FIRST IS ALWAYS YOUR MENTAL BECAUSE ONCE YOU TAKE CARE OF THAT.... YOUR PHYSICAL IS ALREADY TAKEN CARE OF. YOU CANNOT CHANGE A PHYSICAL HABIT LIKE A WALK BY JUST DOING IT.... FIRST YOUR BRAIN HAS TO BE HAPPY WITH IT AND ACCEPT IT TO SHORTYLY MAKE THE TRANSITION. I RECOMMEND THINKING ABOUT SOMETHING TO GET YOUR MIND OFF YOURSELF. TRY TO DO YOUR HOMEWORK IN YOUR HEAD OR REMEMBER FUNNY MOMENTS THAT WOULD MAKE YOU SMILE. IF YOU WALK WITH A SMILE, GIRLS WILL WONDER WHAT SECRETS YOU HAVE. TRY MY ADVICE AND KEEP US UPDATED.
 

jean laurent

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 5, 2005
Messages
39
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by Dingus
You're so nervous and anxious about making a good impression that you're thinking about every movement you're making, which in turn makes you feel that you're awkward because walking is usually second-nature to you.
Yeah, it begins with the anxiety. No doubt this is the case with you, as you stated you have no trouble hanging around with your friends (a non-anxious environment for you).

Omizzi, you are right, mind and body affect each other. (But why DO YOU HAVE TO SCREAM IT?)

The awkward walk can be corrected by focusing on more empowering things in your mind, ie rather than thinking about (focusing on) how you're looking to everyone else, focus on something else, anything else, that helps you feel better. (You can decide for yourself what that is.)

And an anxious frame of mind can also be (at least somewhat) corrected by a more "positive" body posture/stance. It's much easier to feel like a worthless dweeb if your shoulders are hunched over and you're staring at the ground (try it!), but a lot harder if your shoulders are pulled back, chest out and chin up (try it!).

You might feel physically awkward walking in a new way, but that's normal. It's new to you, so like anything else it will take a little time to become comfortable.

MacDiddy, I guess you don't suffer from similar anxiety? Lucky you. Some people do, and if it's affecting their game, is it really such a crime for them to seek advice here? In any case, can one thread in what, five thousand, really be regarded as "reducing" this forum to anything? Come on man, have a heart -- not everyone is da shyt as you are.
 

Alpine

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 21, 2004
Messages
1,576
Reaction score
3
Location
south west, uk
Flint,

Yeah, like many are saying, it's self consciousness that is making you think about what is an autonomous action. When people who have been driving for years are asked to THINK about every action, like depressing the clutch cahnging gear etc. it's almost impossible.

So what's the answer.

Well a quick and simple one is distraction. What I mean is, if your brain is focussed on something else and has a task to do, it's going to have to leave walking to auto-pilot.

By far the best thing is to focus on your breathing (another function normally automatic) focus on deep, slow breathing from your belly. This has the additional benefit of reducing heartrate and general anxiety.

What you must do is practice this. Go to tha mall, get into the state you were in when you feel all akward, then start focussing on your breathing and I mean really focus so everything else is secondary.

You may also notice that your posture improves automatically, your head goes higher, your shoulders relax down and a slight warm smile of ease comes over you.

Practice this it's useful in lots of other situations as I'm sure you can imagine.

To all those who don't know what this kids problem is. Think of something, whatever it is, that gets you scared, a fight, heights, snakes, rats your Dad, whatever it is that's what it feels like, so give him a break.
 

Flint Stoner

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2005
Messages
23
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
New York
Thanks for the tips guys! I'll give em a shot.

For people with similiar problems I read somewhere that thinking of yourself as an 'observer' is helpful too.

For the record, I do act as if I am 'the ****' and I do smile/make EC frequently I just can't get a good comfortable rhythm(I kind of have an awkward body type, 6'6' 190lbs, tall and skinny)
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Top