"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Some really general questions...

blueline

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A lot of PUA theories seem to start with the assumption that you can build attraction where there wasn't any to begin with. Is this a correct assumption? It almost seems as if they conceive of women's attraction as starting as a blank slate provided that you do everything right you have control over.

If some fat fuck who lives in Mom and Dad's basement can bang almost any chick he wants by utilizing the general PUA frameworks, then is the average women even seeking after looks to begin with? Do good looks just happen to highly correlate with a right way of moving and talking, and what women are really attuned to are the stereotyped right ways of moving and talking imprinted on them by their cultural experience?

What brought me to this is that I've seen two dudes I personally know become shredded lifting weights, and basically looking like fitness models, yet neither of these guys have girlfriends. In fact, one of them is always complaining about getting stuck in the friends zone and the other is a 26 yr old virgin who has never done anything physical with a girl. Both of these guys have degrees and good jobs, too, so it's not like their entire lives are broken, they just are clueless on how to act.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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King Turi

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The muscly dudes just don't know how to act and probably don't have much confidence in regards to picking up women.

I personally know a couple of muscly dudes who are no good with the ladies it's just their own little problem, I know for a fact they are attractive to women, because I know a few chicks who think they are hot, but they never pick up since their personalities are way too nice-guyish.
 

Commandante

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Look, in my understanding it´s all about balance. Yeah, I know, it´s pretty boring. Because already the ancient greeks ... but it´s still about balance.

You have to work on your look, self-confidence, social skills, financial background, life-work balance and everything else at the same time. The most people focus only on a small set of important issues. They may seem to be OK, but they don´t. And there are easy-to-boos skills. You can take pills to have big muscles, but you svck if you stop taking them (and there are some nice side effects on the libido as well...). You can by an expensive car or house on credit (I know it´s common in the USA but not everywehere), but you loose it if you don´t work yourself to death. You can by nice clothes but then you have only one pair of everything. You can drink 3+ beers to be the funniest guy of the night but sober during the day you are boring like a dead fish. The most people aren´t patient enough, so they boost some of their skills and forget about balance.

Keeping the balance in a natural way is really hard and that´s why the most people svcks! Like your buddies.
 

Mike32ct

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I agree that it is about balance. At the end of the day, everything matters to SOME extent such as looks, personality, etc. But it's the sum total of your qualities that determines your overall attractiveness.

There are some great looking, really built guys that are very shy. Unless a really aggressive girl goes after them, they don't get laid. I knew a guy who was 6'4", incredibly buff and had girls eyeing him in the club, grinding on him etc. But he just stood there with his "unreactive" frame. Needless to say, he went home alone.

On the other hand, there are some so so looking guys that are very outgoing, confident, funny, etc. While the girls aren't terribly impressed with his looks, given his charm, they are willing to give him a chance.

In this very competitive game, we should seek every edge we can get. Work out, dress well, and also work on your personality, confidence, career, etc.

It's like building a resume. If you want to land your dream job, do you want just one positive thing on your resume, or a whole page of impressive credentials?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Commandante

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Mike32ct said:
It's like building a resume. If you want to land your dream job, do you want just one positive thing on your resume, or a whole page of impressive credentials?
Good example!
 
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