"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Some basic questions

Pozitron

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The basic question here is : How to look approachable? The fact is that I don't know how I'm perceived by others. How to be that kind of person that girls would be interested in?
Another thing I think I do is I neg too much- not really giving any girl value. It's like teasing, but maybe too much... Does this even work in HS? Is it better to show interest? How should you act with classmates(girls)?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Nino-Tk

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Well I would say don't concern with what women think of you, if they approach you...good, if they don't...well still good! Its not their job anyway, YOU have to APPROACh them.
Well, in this forum you will realise theres two philosophies, the DIRECT and INDIRECT...I am Direct which means I go straight to the point, no bull****, no games, I am just HONEST about my desires and intentions, choose the philosophy you want.
 

Pozitron

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By Direct you actually say your intention using words or through action?
 

NorwegianDJ

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Dude, Nino is brutally honest. However stilll disagree with expressing thru words. I There is no black/white.

For your questions,

You do the approaching. Its not natural for girls to approach.
Just smile and spread good vibes.

Girls are interested in confident guys that can give her a wide range of emotions. In a simple form, yeah. Value + emotions.

Neg too much? Observe yourself for a few days and see if its true. If it is, stop doing it for a week. And start giving some sincere compliments.
Teasing is good, but dont do it constantly, or seeking a reaction. Try doing it sparsely for a week.

DO show interest. Noticed how you're attracted to girls that like you? (Atleast when you have a scarcity mindset, which is common).

Joke around with them, talk, be authentic, have fun.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Pozitron

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That was grea. One more thing.. how to show or have VALUE? I may guess some things but it's better to be sure.
 

YoYoRocks

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Its like saying how do you show confidence? You show confidence by being a confident person.

Being confident in yourself isn't something you turn on like a switch. Its part of you.

So how do you show value, by being a high value dude.


So what is a high value person to you? Everyone has different opinion.


Either think it out or write out, what is the ideal man. The guy that I'd kill to be.

Here are a few examples;

Gets a lot of girls, attractive ones
Goes outdoors a lot
Has a nice body
Gets good grades
Rich
Good social life

etc.


You can break it down some more, nice body that girls wet themselves over.

How do you get a nice body;

Start educating myself on nutrition and exercise.
Start to apply the knowledge(adding calories till I have an excess every day, working out)
Sticking to it till I get results, getting the ideal body doesn't happen in months, but years.
 

Jmac21

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You can't wake up and go to high school thinking of a mental checklist of "does and don't's" full of things like "negs" or other techniques. It's just not a natural you, girls can also tell when your trying too hard and they hate that. Just try to be more flirty in general whatever your 'way' of flirting is.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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NorwegianDJ

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Pozitron said:
What's that?
Scarcity = A shortage of supply, or less than ideal.

A scarcity mindset is when you believe that you dont have many girls to choose from. Usually combined with low self-esteem and oneitis.

An abundance mindset is when you believe you can get any girl you want, or that you know you got several options. Usually combined with high self-esteem and experience.

Scarcity mindset will make you more outcome dependent, see higher value in girls and easily cause oneitis.

Solving it? Get reference points. Go get some plates, it's really not that hard.

Abundance mindset will allow you to take greater risks, laught at outcomes and you will put less value on the interaction and a girl.

What I meant with you can use a scarcity mindset is HS is:
By showing interest in a girl, she will often become attracted to you, because she has a degree of a scarcity mindset.
 

Pozitron

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So it's good to work on having an Abundance mindset while using other's scarcity mindset (as you said) in your advantage.
 
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