Solid Advice Needed

[J_Lexis_Bulova]

Im in search of an answer here.
Me and my ex have been together for 6 years now. To make a long story short the problem I was having with her was keeping her attraction level to me. That problem arises because on and off I was having to deal with either financial issues or family issues, and that did affect my confidence and had me being pretty needy. I realized my mistake and I'm working on getting my life in order now as we speak.

2 months ago we broke up, she said she wasn't attracted to me anymore and wasn't in love with me anymore. At first I tried rationalizing with her letting her know I understand why she wasn't attracted to me and that I was planning on getting things together but led to no avail, then everyone told me to do no contact because she broke up with me so thats what I've been doing no contact the same she has been doing to me also.

Now on my birthday she called me to wish me a happy birthday and we had small talk then she asked if it were comfortable with me would I file her taxes for her ( I'm a tax preparer) I told her I would and that I was over the break up. I have not contacted her yet about filing her taxes, I'm still taking my time to figure it out because that will be our first time seeing each other since the break up.

I have a problem here, I do love her and I do care about her, I just have not always known better, because If i have I would not be where I am today.
How do I gain her interest back, our past relationship is broken and I take that as a blessing. How can I sweep her off her feet again and begin things new the right way?

 

[Cremasta]

She is over you, plain and simple.
Right now, all you are to her is someone she knows with a useful skill.

You say you are working on getting your life in order? That's not important to her. She doesn't seem to want someone who is sorting themselves out. She wants someone who IS sorted out.

Walk away, don't try to contact her at all, find someone better!

Good luck

 

[VladPatton]

I agree with Cremasta. I wouldn't do her taxes. Why go through the agony of seeing her again. There is no such thing as getting her back in reality. To "win her over" again is to surrender your power completely.

Please insert balls into purse and step to the left.

Once a woman looses interest, it's over. As harsh as that sounds, it's for your own progress. You need at least 6 months of being single to get over her completely and to get your head back. No cutesy phone calls, emails, or texts in the meantime, over means over, done.

Only then will you be able to gain your own self confidence back and realize you don't need anyone but yourself to be healthy. Work on yourself so you never fall into this trap again.

 

[BadNews]

Forget about her. Do your own taxes and worry about your own sh!t. It is time to move on to bigger and better things my friend. I ended a 6 year relationship a couple years ago, and you won't start feeling better until you focus on yourself and decide to move on. You're never going to make someone else happy if you can't make yourself happy.

 

[vatoloco]

Me and my ex have been together for 6 years now.

Six years is a long time. Not trying to put you down bro but, I am sure there were signs of her dropping Interest Level (IL) that you missed...

2 months ago we broke up, she said she wasn't attracted to me anymore and wasn't in love with me anymore.

Once a woman says this, it's over forever.

Go back and read the above sentence again. Ingrain it into your brain.

Now on my birthday she called me to wish me a happy birthday and we had small talk then she asked if it were comfortable with me would I file her taxes for her ( I'm a tax preparer)

So she dumps you and still wants to use you!? Gee, this is outrageous and unheard of!

I told her I would

WHY DID YOU DO THIS!!?? This girl dumps you (and is probably fucking another dude or 5 already) and wants to use you.

Sorry bro, but you can stick a fork in this relationship. It's done. Finito.

I know you love her but you have to keep the No Contact (NC) and eventually kills those feelings you have for her. Once you meet another girl, this one will just be a distant, fond memory.

Trust me.

 

[seethehoop]

I disagree with the above, I think you should do her taxes...at your usual hourly rate.

But move on buddy, its done. Concentrate on improving and you well get a better women.

 

[Vantagepoint34]

Once interest level dips under 50% there's no way to bring it back. Unless you win the lottery, don't count on it. Start over with a different girl. She's out there trust me!