"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Social Support

Oni

Senior Don Juan
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I realized that having the support of those around you, your friends, can lead to a high confidence. However, as time progresses, it seems like my friends are no longer very supportive. We still hang out together but a lot of times, they will do things without me. I know the best thing i can do is ditched these so called friends and find new ones, but with only 2 months left of high school, there is not much that i can do. Meanwhile, without anyone supporting me, life is incredibly hard when it comes to having confidence. How may i overcome this obstacle?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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mastersF

Don Juan
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Hello there. You can hang out with me then =) i only charge $5 per hour of hangout time. nah the waiting list is too long already.

I think you got to realise that your happiness should not be derived from others. With of without the company of your friends, you should be seeking to make yourself happy. Friends, like women, come and go in our lives. and we shouldn't become too possessive over them. i.e. wanting to do everything with them. Give them some breathing space, take the initiative to ask them out for some activities sometimes.

On a side note, I do have some friends who told me that they ask me out less often cause I always seem to be busy. On top of that, when they hang out in school with me, they are daunted by the sheer number of people who say hi to me, quote "It's almost as though you are a superstar". Maybe you can think along those lines and find out if there are any faults on your side. Just a suggestion though, don't become too self critical.
 

organizedconfusion

Master Don Juan
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if you are strong in a group, are you strong without them?
if not, then i suggest you become stronger on your OWN instead of relying on others for strength.
 

Oni

Senior Don Juan
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Well, in my point of view, it seems high school is all about friends. In college it will be different but right now those without friends seem to be a loner or conceited. So i have friends, but just not very great ones.
 

organizedconfusion

Master Don Juan
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having good friends and enjoying their company is totally different from the guy that NEEDS the validation/approval, social support of a group in order to form and feed his identity.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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