Social Proofing in HighSchool

[TheRat]

i was the biggest geek back in da freshman days of highschool and so i didnt make alot of popular friends
well now im a totally changed person and i want to be part of the social group since i realized my friends are BAFC's (holding a girls hand is a big deal to them) anyways i have a GF now and all and i wanna join up with them
the problem is its kind of HARD getting accepted if you were a pretty big nerd, im 'friends' wid the popular kids meaning they dont hate me or anything but were not close and like they dont really wanna be seen around you if you were the biggest nerd.

So just wondering how i should go on about getting in the circle and avoiding/letting them tell me off due to my past

ex. i walk up to one of them: "how long did u spent on ur cmop yesterday" (i spendl ike 2 hours now, before it was around 10 atleast..yea) but anyways any tips/advice on 'GAINING/JOINING up with the alpha crew' would be apperciated. (ive already read the dj bible)

 

[Vigilante7]

Search the High School articles in this database...

basically

1) Talk to and respect everyone
2) Change your style, whether it be clothes (if u dress bad) or attitude
3) dont be clingy
4) Since you want to change, you have to make the move

 

[TheRat]

my style is great i think thats the only reason im friends wid the alpha crowd, cuz i dont dress in tight pants etc

anyawys *lookin for details

 

[TheRat]

its just that ive got that bad rep from before and i dont wanna get rejected by the alphas which might make my worsen my image in front of the girls.

 

[TheRat]

anymore advice?

 

[seveneleven]

Changing people's views take a long time. I'm finding this out the hard way. The best way to become better friends with people is to joke around, imo.

 

[DJoneday]

Is your girlfriend part of the alpha crowd? Cause at least at my school, if you have a girlfriend from your school who isn't part of the cool kids crowd, then it'll make it that much harder to fit in. Why exactally do you want to be in that crowd though?

I've been there, and most of the guys are pricks and will do anything to get ahead, I met a few good guys and stayed cool with them, and picked up buddies from other groups too. For example, I have a friend who's a complete punk rock kid, wears the torn clothes and has the piercings n all that - he's one of my best buddies. I also have some preppy kid friends who wouldn't give the punk rock kid a second chance, even though he's fvckin awesome.

Being part of the alpha crowd could get you some social proof, but don't restrict yourself to that, as it can make you pretty blind to the rest of the world.

I'm not saying not to expand your horizons, because by being in your group of friends you're doing exactally the same thing as if you joined the alpha crowd. Try to be a guy that everyone gets along with, who can drift into any crowd he wants and be accepted. Just joke around with everyone and stay laid back.

 

[tactic]

Changing big is the key. Once you've changed into anothe person, you have more advantage of getting more social proof.

 

[TheRat]

well so far, i can hang with almost every social crowd except with like this crowd...and i dont want to seem like a looser if i just start trying to hang out with them.

 

[tactic]

They known as the loser group or something?

 

[Porky]

Don't become friends with the popular kids.

BECOME the popular kid.

 

[tactic]

Porky,

I don't know why but for some reason your posts are just so right, if you know what i mean.

Therat, you don't have to hang out w/ the popular ones... Just be popular yourself.

 

[Porky]

Ha, thanks.

The popular kids aren't worth sh1t if they don't treat everybody with respect.

Maybe it's just me, but I think it's better to be friends with 50 decently cool people than 10 super-popular people. More parties that way.