Social Life = huge part of life

[escobar04]

so I signed up over a year ago, absorbed everything I could, changed my life and havent visited in a loooong while (thanks sosuave)

but here's the problem:

first off Im great with chicks and thats outta the way but I seriously have no male friends

Im 19, have money, time, work out super hard, have an 04 Mercedes, also work as a "model/brand rep" over at a local Abercrombie but I have no friends

outta like 50 comments on myspace only like 5 of them are from my boys.

some of you would think thats a great life and all but Im totally misarable, its summer and I sit at home and play video games all day, no one calls me, no one invites me over to parties, no one wants to kick it. nothing

I used to have a friend who always knew of a party and always had something to do so my life was good, but now he joined Coast Guard and Im stuck at home all week and weekends. the misery Im in right now doesnt even let me work out. I havent felt that bad ever since I joined here

I mean, I have a coupla of friends but they're either in deep relationships or video game geeks who dont go outside

so what should I do? should I move to a different city? should I move out of my parents house and get some roommates? should I join some kinda Star Wars convention? should I just try to submit a tape to be a paricipant on Real Wold? how should I improve my social life?

please help bros!

 

[Permission]

you work as a model?

Anyway, if you're great with chicks then why do you spend all day playing video games?

 

[rocky_mtn]

Get a hobby that involves getting outside. Be the man that other people want to hang out with. Get some interests and go out and do it, you will find others with the same interest to hang out with.

no one calls me, no one invites me over to parties, no one wants to kick it. nothing

Call someone, don't wait for them to call you. Have a party, invite some of the neighbors and/or people from work.

Sounds corny, but sign up to volunteer somewhere like the animal shelter or helping disadvantaged youth or whatever you would find interesting. You'll feel better about yourself and you be with other volunteers you can make friends with.

 

[PRiSM92289]

why areny you in college?

 

[DonMEgaHoss]

Why is it that everyone has the idea now that you HAVE to go to college?

Just an overpayed long summer camp where you party at your parent expense. Me I dont have that privilage. I had to leave high school work full time and finish schooling all when I was 16/17 so... yeah....


I only have a good guy friends the rest are those who come around when they want something like devan said.


But the my co-workers like the entire cooking crew are all homies


But the higher a monkey climbs the more you see his ass. And people will try to screw you over. Seeing that a$$ lol

yeah the more you improve apon yourself the more people resent you for they are still stuck in their pitiful ways.

 

[escobar04]

you know, since some of you brought it up, I do feel that some people are just jealous of me

not to be ****y but after I meet some cool dude everything is fine, but then he sees my Benzo then ****s different

Im not ****y, I dont rub **** in people's faces, Im a good kid but I loose "homies" pretty fast

I do go to school, a community college for one more semester but it isnt a social scene at all

Thanks anyways for all the replys

 

[unreal-guy]

what the ****

you just have to show off

Im 19, have money(rich parents), time(the get the **** out of the house and find something to do, a nice walk and meeting hotties), work out super hard(does it work? oh are you just overweight), have an 04 Mercedes(i wish i have rich parents to buy me a nice car), also work as a "model/brand rep"(so now your saying your a scenester, but yet you have no friends) over at a local Abercrombie but I have no friends

maybe you should think about each thing i underlined

 

[escobar04]

see, thats exactly what Im talking about

the dude above me already hates me without even getting to know me, I put up with this typa stuff everyday

no, Im not showing off, I dont do that. I listed the things you underlined just to show what kinda situation Im in and Im far from overweight and my job doesnt do **** for me. its not as fun as you'd think, anyways, if you cant help out then there's no need to reply

but thanks anyways

 

[DarkLight]

Sell your car... get a pinto.
Quit going to the gym... Order a Pizza.
Quit your job... take up pro-gamer status.

lol.

Bro... just get yourself into more social scenes.
I just got a job at a restaraunt 5 days ago... and its fvckin ridiculous.
Seriously... I have like 15 new friends. Like the DonMEGA said above... all the dudes in the kitchen are the homey's. Straight up! Same w. me. I highly reccomend trying out for a waiter or bartender position. Its MAD social, get to meet a load of people, forever refine your social charm, communication, meet a load of new/different people daily, and all the peeps that already work there. Its such a scene, in a positive way.

Anyways... another perspective on this is. Sounds like all the friends DevanE lost were petty chumps anyways. Your story sounds like you got your ego so polished in regards to being sexually attractive to the opposite sex, that other dudes just feel inadequate and hate on you, before they get a chance to feel the deeper equal coolness.

So go get yourself into some new networks, with sincere interest to meet some equally good peeps. They're out there... just got to sift through a good amount. Thus the value in very social jobs, etc.

 

[realsmoothie]

Guys are jealous fvcks too.

I noticed that ever since I started to turn myself around a couple of years ago, a lot of my old friends didn't want to hang around with me any more. I could tell that my successes... no matter how small, were making them feel badly about themselves.

My suggestion? Don't flash your own success too brightly with other guys.

 

[escobar04]

folks like DarkLight shall have their own TV shows

thanks man, I knew sosuave wouldnt let me down

good lookin out

 

[PeterNorthisawesome]

I had a similar problem I had to deal with, when I lived in Japan for 15 years I went to a small private school. I had a problem of lying which pissed kids off, I didn't realize this until 6th grade when I decided to change it and repaired my reputation by apologizing to everyone. Since everyone knew from kindergarden they forgave me and I was able to be friends with everyone in the school.

Still most weekends I would hangout alone and just talk to people on instant messaging. Pretty soon I got fed up, so my last year at the school I decided to change. I got ppl's phone number, flirted with hot chicks from other schools, got a girlfriend, and decided to start asking people to hang out with me after school to play basketball or go clubbing over the weekends. Pretty soon I had a clique of 10 guys who stayed after school and talk/ joke around with me, soon I had 3 best friends! One for academics, one for sarging / clubbing and one for working out/ sports! That was probably the best year I ever had. I didn't sit back and wait for those kids to call me I called them or sent instant message for what to do and stuff and they listened and followed me. So if you want to get a social life YOU got to do it, trust me those friends of yours isn't trying to exclue you but they're busy people too so do them a favor and CALL/ INSTANT MESSAGE THEM. Also make sure that when your hanging out with them that you all have fun!

 

[red_headed_stepchild]

You need to work on your social skills, Bro. You come across as conceited on your posts. I dunno if you are or not, but you come across that way. I'll bet you're doing the same thing in public. Take the focus off yourself, and what you have. If anyone asks about it, shrug it off.

Get involved with something you enjoy. Go get a hobby that puts you into a social setting. Join a band, perform in a community play, join a Brazillian Jujutsu class, volunteer your time, whatever. It doesn't really matter what you do, just do something you enjoy. You'll meet people.

 

[PeterNorthisawesome]

PeterNorth, I have to agree with you throughly, but the thing is that you get tired of that shiat when people don't reciprocate back. They either say sh*t their gonna do and don't come through and leave you hangin or they just don't wanna chill with you period. One thing I hate, I utterly hate is when people say that their going to do something, your on time etc etc and their is no sign of them, I mean if you didn't wanna do it why didn't you just tell me and not waste my time.

For example, I talked to tons of people last semester I'm talkin TONS!!!!, talked a couple of dudes and told them Im gonna be in the gym lifting or playing ball etc etc, "...yeaa Imma come through.." don't even show up, after a while they even stop picking their phones up. After a while I got tired of always trying to initiate things I mean for how long can you keep doing it. The reason I would tell them is that I always heard them talking to their friends how they should ball and things like that, so I tried to be a part of it too but I guess I just wasn't cool enough.

Im not trying to bit*h but in college apparently it;s a lot harder to make friends then high-school so this summer Im just doin my own thang by myself.

Sorry to hear that, from my experiance you gotta actually talk and become somewhat connected/ create rapport first and then start things out slowly. If you still do that and they don't respond then it means they're just not friend material so drop em and find some new ones. At least you and me have it easier since we got a hobby to make connections with other people. Also don't tell em you'll be shooting around or be lifting weights ask them to meet them to come alond with you and meet them somewhere, if they don't call em and see what the deal is.

 

[DarkLight]

folks like DarkLight shall have their own TV shows

thanks man, I knew sosuave wouldnt let me down

good lookin out

lol... Cheers Bro'

 

[escobar04]

You need to work on your social skills, Bro. You come across as conceited on your posts. I dunno if you are or not, but you come across that way. I'll bet you're doing the same thing in public. Take the focus off yourself, and what you have. If anyone asks about it, shrug it off.

Get involved with something you enjoy. Go get a hobby that puts you into a social setting. Join a band, perform in a community play, join a Brazillian Jujutsu class, volunteer your time, whatever. It doesn't really matter what you do, just do something you enjoy. You'll meet people.

see, thats where this site kinda screws you over, you learn all the ****y and funny and then you become ****y and funny

I seriously almost got my ass beat for "joking" with one of my friends (a huge monster on steroids)

I dont mean to come off as conceited but sometimes I cant help it and probably dont even realize what Im doing

no one ever tells me that, I just wanna have a normal life but people always call me "a$$hole" "jerk" etc. I mean its great with girls but its hard when it comes to homies

 

[HOSS83]

have an 04 Mercedes, also work as a "model/brand rep" over at a local Abercrombie

How in the world did you pull that off? I used to be a brand rep at A&F and with their minimum wage paychecks could barely afford to put gas in my car..