"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Social Experiment 3

Reyaj

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Ok here is the 3rd experimen in my Social Experiment series.

I will try and be "friends" with a girl I met while out on the town. I took her out on a few dates but nothing really happend, and the fact that she talked about her ex a lot turned me off. But anyway rather than just throw this girl to the side like I normally do with girls that piss me off, I decided to keep this girl as a friend on the side. After I started ignorning her she has called me a lot more (typical) and we talk on the phone from time to time.

Well today I needed a date for a wedding, so I asked her to come. My plan is to keep this girl as a friend and a friend only. I want to see what benefits one can have by having a female friend. One minor note, this girl may actually be interested in me (not sure) but regardless I will track my progress with her and report it here.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Reyaj

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Definitely right.

Well we actually ended up being late for the wedding, so I decided to take her to dinner. (I sometimes treat my friends to dinner/drinks so this isn't an AFC move)

Well we talked and she definitely opened up to me a lot.

When I went to drop her home, she fumbled around in my car looking for her keys after I kissed her on the cheek. I think she may have been waiting for me to make a move. I didn't though....


So far, friend zone!
 

Reyaj

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Ok well this girl got mad at me for not calling her this weekend to hang out. When I told her I went to the beach she got mad at me and said "you never want to hang out with me"

I am actually seeing another girl so I think I will let her know this. I will let her know that I want to be solely friends for now. Let's see how she reacts.
 

Reyaj

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just an update:

This weekend I spent the day at the beach with her. She even bought me lunch at burger king.

She looked kind of good so I was tempted to try something but I didn't... no kiss goodbye either when I dropped her off.

She did scratch my arm when I said it itched while I was driving home. I also joking through pebbles on her back while on the beach and she did the same to me.

She has called me twice afterwards and I have been basically treating her as a friend.

Although tonight I said "you know you looked pretty for a second I was thinking things but I controlled myself"

She laughed.


I mentioned us helping each other pick up members of the opposite sex but she seemed opposed to it.

I will keep you updated on this experiment.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Reyaj

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I hung out and went shopping with her this weekend. She looked kinda good as I noticed myself starring at times, so I tried to catch myself. She helped me pick out some nice clothes to go out with. She would drag my arm at times to go into a store when i wasn't paying attention so some kino going on there.

She buttoned my shirts for as I was trying stuff on in the dressing rooms.

Still I didn't do anything.

She is going to try and set one of her friends up with one of mine and we will all hang out.

Stay tuned.
 

Cod3r

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Interesting experiment...

I've had a few female friends in the past before and can lend you some insight into what it will offer you. First one kinda found me attractive, I kidna found her attractive but nothing so strong we couldn't resist. She had bf.. i had gf... but we would hang out and discuss our relo's and eat together, walk together, it was pretty fun...

advantages

1. Never bored, always something to do with a cool person
2. Sexual tension was exciting eventho we wouldn't act... just exciting
3. Proof, hanging out with females adds to your attractiveness

The next one was pretty damn hot... I'll post pic later... and ALOT of guys wanted her. So walking around and chillin with her brought ALOT of proof. I brought her to company xmas party and helped further my career (internship was sposed to be done a year ago... i'm STILL here muahaha) My boss even congratulated me on tappin that ass and said i better keep her or he'd hit !! Also was alot of fun, we'd talk and hang out... never bored... partner in crime. Almost a best friend actually... i was attracted, she wasn't so it ended... to keep going its gotta be mutual either both not attracted or both attracted, any difference and eventually it ends...

Advantages

1. Never bored
2. MUCH social proof

It's good actually, I need to make another one. Haven't had one in about 6 months and I miss it... purely friends is good... juss don't become attracted


-Cod3r
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Ashigaru

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Nice keep this up. I would like to see where it goes.

I actually have a few hot females friends and it really does only good things for you. But anything over 10 good female friends makes you just a homo.
 

Reyaj

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Ok so yesterday I invited my friend to this party my other friend (who is female also) was having.

Only I got to the party first and it sucked, so I called her and said don't come this place sucks.

Well she was pissed.... She's like "what the ****! I got all dressed up and youw are telling me to stay home"

I was like

"sorry.. I can pick up you later and we can hang out for a bit if you wan't"

she is like

"ok you better"

anyway it was already late and I was so tired and had a few drinks that even though I was horny and probably would have made a move on her. SO I called her back

"hey its kinda late i think we hsould do this another time"

she was like

"forget you.. I hate you... you always do this to me... dont call me anymore"

I was like apologizing and whatever... saying I'd make it up to her but she was just mad....

Not sure if I should call her today or not....
 

eminence

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do you treat all your friends like that, male and female?
 

Phyzzle

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Dammit Jayer! :cuss:

I don't even let hot babes get away with making plans with me, and just blatantly chaning her mind later.

And, what's worse, you're not even a hot babe.

Do you let your friends treat you like that? Flake out on you and squander a whole night?
 

Reyaj

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So last saturday we went clubbing in the city. We definitely did a lot of kino (a little dancing, playful flirting) but I did not make a bold move and niether did she. I'll admit I was tempted as I was drinking but I picked her up from a home where she had family so if anything I didnt really have the opportunity. The next day she said she had a good time. Not sure if she likes me or if wonders if I like her. But so far its great having a female friend.

I hope to keep it this way.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Charm

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Hey having a friend isnt bad, just dont forget to pursue other options or you'll go to AFC Hell
 

Reyaj

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hung out with her and some other friends at a club this weekend. a lot of kino going on but i refrained from doing anything. its great having friends that are girls!
 

Obsidian

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w/e Jayer

I don't think any amount of social proof is worth perpetual psychological torment
 

jaymo

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Obsidian said:
w/e Jayer

I don't think any amount of social proof is worth perpetual psychological torment
Well it's not like attraction is a choice for us guys, esp when we're doing things with girls that would (in any other similar situation with a cute girl) get us attracted to her or amplify that attraction within us.

Heck. I have a female friend who was hot, but after hearing about the 10-20 guys she was with over the past year and how "easy" she was I decided to keep it just friends. Of course, that was the original plan. The girl was being incredibly flirty with me, getting to the point to where she was flashing me in front of her friends while I was looking away. If you looked at some of the pictures of us together, you'd think we were together or something (there one of her sitting on my lap). That sort of thing. And this girl's an 8 if not a 9, and 5 foot 3.

Anyways, sh!t like that screwed with my head, but I was able to keep it under wraps for the most part until her friends put me up to getting her a valentine's day gift. Long story short, she found out ahead of time, and it turned out to be a very AFC thing to do. She put me into the LJBF zone, but then I told her that I originally had no intentions of being with her and that her friends put me up to it. I avoided her for a few weeks to allow my head to clear.

As it is, we still hang out, and people are always asking if we're together, so I know the whole social proof thing is working.
I still treat her like any other girl, but only with the exception that I have no intentions with being with her. The way she acts sometimes still affects me, but it's not something I can really help. I just recognize what happens for what it is, and keep disqualifying her in my head as to why she would make a sucky GF.

I suggest you do the same if you want to keep your sanity in all of this. Wandering if she's really attracted to you or not by what she says or does is only going to screw with your head if your only intentions with her is to just be her (real) friend.
 
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Vypros

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Jayer said:
"forget you.. I hate you... you always do this to me... dont call me anymore"

I was like apologizing and whatever... saying I'd make it up to her but she was just mad....

Not sure if I should call her today or not....
You're social experiment is causing her to like you.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

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