"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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So yeah wassap homies?

DrBeard

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Dr Beard droppin by to giv shouts to the DJ massiv!

Been busy as fock lately man. Got my own gang and we go up the pub and pull birds and get into fights and shiat.

I got a whack in the balls the other day tho man! This chick was checkin me out and stuff but she had a bore friend with her so I go over to her and say "yo! Drop that chicken dinner and get with a winner" like right in front of his AFC ass. He's laughing and shiat and being a total ponce. He aint even standing up to me so I like grab the girl by the arm and try to take control like a real man. I tell her she is coming with me for a shag over the park but she punches me in the bollocks! The AFC loser told me to piss off and they left.

I swear I wud hav knocked that skonner on his tail but my balls hurt too much. I was worried after cos I dint get no stiffy all day but this hot milf biatch walked past me. She was like Liz Mcdonalds from coranation street and I could see her tits bouncing and I got a major boner. IT was so bad! I should have asked for a titwank but I jerked it myself at home instead.

I got a bit of flu now so I am sitting at home mostly playin playstation 2 and my mum's pelvis was playing up again so she's been home and we watched TV together.

I will catch yo boyz soon! Peace Out!
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Jariel

Master Don Juan
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DrBeard said:
my mum's pelvis was playing up again
:eek: What the fvck have you been doing to her, you sick freak!?!

Only kidding. Always good to see you around here, even if it is just a flying visit.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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comic_relief

Master Don Juan
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You got H5N1, the bird flu? Best of luck man!

comic_relief
 
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