"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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So word is spreading about me and my oneitis...

C

cali4nialove

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I need some advice. I've always been told and have learned that its never good for the girl to know you like her unless youre right about to gf her. I know your supposed to show interest in a girl you like, but not to let her know you fully like her cus then its not a mystery anymore.

Well, I have 4 classes with my oneitis and talk to her a lot. We havent really been on a date yet (we both tried but never found good times, she even called me for one once) but now I hear word spreading about me that i "really like her" and wanted to know how to respond to that. My friend just texted me saying "You like ****** ;)" So I dont really know how to respond to it.

convo between my friend:

HER: You like ***** ;)
ME: I never tell that stuff to anyone, not even *****(my best friend)...so yes no maybe so(;
HER: Shut up. I know you do, its obvious.
ME: Hows it obvious? Ive never said anything or done anything?
HER: I know you do. So dont rtry to play it off (;
ME: Haha you dont know anything...yet (;
HER: You're gay. Stop I already know, so just admit it.
ME: I cant say yes, I cant say no...cus youre a bigmouth.
HER: Well I already know so its ok.

I dont know what to say after that.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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C

cali4nialove

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BPH said:
Chumpy as hell. Admit that you like her when people ask you that crap. You shouldn't care, you shouldn't feel like you have to hide it.

If somebody asks me if I like a girl and I do I'll just say "yeah, she's pretty cute". None of this little back-and-forth he-said-she-said crap.
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fuuuaarkkkkk now I regret all those damn texts. Should have just ****ing said that. :(
 
E

Eph

Master Don Juan
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If your friend and your oneitis are friends, then your oneitis might just be trying to figure out if you like her or not by using friends. Take it as a good sign, and if your friend texts/talks to you later about it just be straight up about it. Personally I'd play around with the idea a little if one of my friends tried to pester me about it by saying something like,"Don't worry when your balls drop you'll start liking girls too". But yeah like BPH said just be straight up.

And yeah, you could have done better than "I never tell that stuff to anyone...". But its live and learn.
 
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Mindgamez

Master Don Juan
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You're overthinking it. If you like her, that's great. Let her know. Letting her know you like her isn't a big deal. It doesn't mean you're in love with her, that she won you 100%. You can still keep a bit of mystery...

Just admit the truth, people will respect that.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Nino-Tk

Master Don Juan
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I will agree with most, look man, I've learned something and that is, your words aren't important at all, what's important is your intentions. So you might be trying to keep some 'mystery' with your words but your intention is always shining through like bright neon lights. Girls being intuitive as hell will pick up on this, I've never understood mystery to be honest because to me, there's no better aphrodisiac than being desired and all girls want to be desired! Whether by you or somebody else.
 
L

LearningSlowly

Master Don Juan
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Whether or not you're honest to this friend doesn't really matter, she knows either way.

But once gossip starts spreading, the girl you like will be embarrassed to flirt with you the same way you have been. Take her on a date NOW and make things happen, it's critical.
 
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