This is definetly my biggest flaw. I have a hard time picking up on girl's interest and most of all showing them that I am interested. I can have a convo with a chick fine, but I'll find out later that she still doesn't know if I like her or not. A girl I was talking to last week said that she would never show interest unless a guy did so to her first. Saying "Hi" just doesn't get it done because they don't know if you are just being friendly or not. Any ideas?
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
So what are some good ways to show interest without going overboard?
- Thread starter SamMalone
- Start date
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Just ask her to meet up with you somewhere.
WC2
Master Don Juan
The best way to show interest and not go overboard is through humor. If you're interested in a woman, don't talk seriously to her. Poke a little fun and be light hearted about it. If a woman still can't get your drift by then, simply tell her you and her should do something.
Dongfu
Banned
- Joined
- May 22, 2007
- Messages
- 943
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Intentionally erotic/playfull eye contact
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
You might be waiting a very long time.Stéphane said:NEVER show interest until the girl shows interest. Get her hooked on you, and then show interest.
The best way to show interest is to ask for her number or suggest that you do something together. When you do it that way you know, that she knows, that your interested. If you don't "ask her out" there is a chance that she can figure out that you are interested in her, but you may not know that she knows.
A very important thing is to kino them. Touching a girl shows her that you are a sexual being. If you don't touch girls they won't really know that you like them. I've made the mistake of going out with a few girls in the past but I never touched them. Needless to say, I never got anywhere with them.
One thing that I'm not sure of, is if I should find out if a girl has a boyfriend or not before. I'm not in the mood to waste time on girls with BF's. I figure that if I ask if she has a boyfriend, I'll get a quick answer and know whether to move on or not.
Interceptor
Master Don Juan
WHnever yuo show INTEREST too early, women will pick up on the break in the flow. They will then start to realize that you aren't too experienced wuith women, have few options,and are in fact, needy and desperate.
INTEREST from YOU is EARNED.
You only SHOW INTEREST to a Woman who has EARNED IT.
You can show ATTRACTION, but not INTEREST.
You are a heterosexual male, it is normal and natural to be sexually attracted to women.
Acknowledge it. Accept it.
Show it through your interactions.
"Look, I like you. But I don't know you that well. I want to get to know you better."
Then, if she is attracted she will reciprocate.
If you have built RAPPORT and COMFORT she will be more inclined to be INTERESTED in you.
Likewise for you.
If she HAS something that you want other than the pvssy (very funny. very spiritual, very attentive and affectionate, has the same exact outlook on life as you...) , then you can show you INTEREST in THAT.
But only when you have something that she gives you.
you: "I like Yoga."
Her: "Oh really! That's awesome. I like yoga too! I think you're a cool guy. I haven't met many guys like you! I love your smile. You seem like a good person..yada yada..."
you; "Hey, I feel the same way. You seem sweet, intelligent. I like that. That's sexyAnd you have a deep spirtual side. I'd like to get to know you better. Come have a drink with me.." yada yada
Most guys go in looking FOR APPROVAL.
This is WRONG.
Most guys DO NOT Qualify their Women.
This is WRONG.
Most guys ONLY LOOK for the HOTTEST women, without REGARD for their CHARACTER.
This is WRONG.
Most guys are too desperate and needy.
This is WRONG.
most guys attach too much MEANING and IMPORTANCE on a woman who is actually a stranger to them.
This is WRONG.
Most guys think that a strange woman is OBLIGATED to GIVE them what they NEED.
This is WRONG.
INTEREST from YOU is EARNED.
You only SHOW INTEREST to a Woman who has EARNED IT.
You can show ATTRACTION, but not INTEREST.
You are a heterosexual male, it is normal and natural to be sexually attracted to women.
Acknowledge it. Accept it.
Show it through your interactions.
"Look, I like you. But I don't know you that well. I want to get to know you better."
Then, if she is attracted she will reciprocate.
If you have built RAPPORT and COMFORT she will be more inclined to be INTERESTED in you.
Likewise for you.
If she HAS something that you want other than the pvssy (very funny. very spiritual, very attentive and affectionate, has the same exact outlook on life as you...) , then you can show you INTEREST in THAT.
But only when you have something that she gives you.
you: "I like Yoga."
Her: "Oh really! That's awesome. I like yoga too! I think you're a cool guy. I haven't met many guys like you! I love your smile. You seem like a good person..yada yada..."
you; "Hey, I feel the same way. You seem sweet, intelligent. I like that. That's sexyAnd you have a deep spirtual side. I'd like to get to know you better. Come have a drink with me.." yada yada
Most guys go in looking FOR APPROVAL.
This is WRONG.
Most guys DO NOT Qualify their Women.
This is WRONG.
Most guys ONLY LOOK for the HOTTEST women, without REGARD for their CHARACTER.
This is WRONG.
Most guys are too desperate and needy.
This is WRONG.
most guys attach too much MEANING and IMPORTANCE on a woman who is actually a stranger to them.
This is WRONG.
Most guys think that a strange woman is OBLIGATED to GIVE them what they NEED.
This is WRONG.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
Now I'm just confused.
How are attraction and interest different?
I don't mean to be an ass or anything but your example isn't probable.
Odds are it happens like this
you: "I like Yoga."
Her: "Oh really! That's awesome. I like yoga too!
you: ...
How are attraction and interest different?
I don't mean to be an ass or anything but your example isn't probable.
Odds are it happens like this
you: "I like Yoga."
Her: "Oh really! That's awesome. I like yoga too!
you: ...
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Interceptor
Master Don Juan
Attraction is more related to physical attraction.
Interest is more related to making an emotional investement.
My example was just an example out of the air. It can be of a woman with high IL.
The fact that your using "probable" for an imaginary event with a million different variations shows that you need to get out more and live.
Women with high IL do talk like that.
But your own self limiting belief won't let you even acknowledge that it exists.
This is why for now, you will never see it.
Interest is more related to making an emotional investement.
My example was just an example out of the air. It can be of a woman with high IL.
The fact that your using "probable" for an imaginary event with a million different variations shows that you need to get out more and live.
Women with high IL do talk like that.
But your own self limiting belief won't let you even acknowledge that it exists.
This is why for now, you will never see it.
WC2
Master Don Juan
Awesome post.Interceptor said:WHnever yuo show INTEREST too early, women will pick up on the break in the flow. They will then start to realize that you aren't too experienced wuith women, have few options,and are in fact, needy and desperate.
INTEREST from YOU is EARNED.
You only SHOW INTEREST to a Woman who has EARNED IT.
You can show ATTRACTION, but not INTEREST.
You are a heterosexual male, it is normal and natural to be sexually attracted to women.
Acknowledge it. Accept it.
Show it through your interactions.
"Look, I like you. But I don't know you that well. I want to get to know you better."
Then, if she is attracted she will reciprocate.
If you have built RAPPORT and COMFORT she will be more inclined to be INTERESTED in you.
Likewise for you.
If she HAS something that you want other than the pvssy (very funny. very spiritual, very attentive and affectionate, has the same exact outlook on life as you...) , then you can show you INTEREST in THAT.
But only when you have something that she gives you.
you: "I like Yoga."
Her: "Oh really! That's awesome. I like yoga too! I think you're a cool guy. I haven't met many guys like you! I love your smile. You seem like a good person..yada yada..."
you; "Hey, I feel the same way. You seem sweet, intelligent. I like that. That's sexyAnd you have a deep spirtual side. I'd like to get to know you better. Come have a drink with me.." yada yada
Most guys go in looking FOR APPROVAL.
This is WRONG.
Most guys DO NOT Qualify their Women.
This is WRONG.
Most guys ONLY LOOK for the HOTTEST women, without REGARD for their CHARACTER.
This is WRONG.
Most guys are too desperate and needy.
This is WRONG.
most guys attach too much MEANING and IMPORTANCE on a woman who is actually a stranger to them.
This is WRONG.
Most guys think that a strange woman is OBLIGATED to GIVE them what they NEED.
This is WRONG.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
I still don't get it. How would I show interest vs. showing attraction?Interceptor said:Attraction is more related to physical attraction.
Interest is more related to making an emotional investement.
My problem is not that I don't believe that it exists, it's that I've never talked to a girl who has such a high interest level in me. I've had girls respond with "thats cool" or "sweat" when I tell them something I've done. I've never had a girl actually talk about me.My example was just an example out of the air. It can be of a woman with high IL.
The fact that your using "probable" for an imaginary event with a million different variations shows that you need to get out more and live.
Women with high IL do talk like that.
But your own self limiting belief won't let you even acknowledge that it exists.
This is why for now, you will never see it.
That I guess answers my question. Interest is when somebody says something about the other person to them. "I like how you...", "you are..."
Then how do you show attraction?
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
Interest:
Attraction:1. the feeling of a person whose attention, concern, or curiosity is particularly engaged by something: She has a great interest in the poetry of Donne.
2. something that concerns, involves, draws the attention of, or arouses the curiosity of a person: His interests are philosophy and chess.
3. power of exciting such concern, involvement, etc.; quality of being interesting: political issues of great interest.
If you can understand the differences you will understand!!1. the act, power, or property of attracting.
2. attractive quality; magnetic charm; fascination; allurement; enticement: the subtle attraction of her strange personality.
3. a person or thing that draws, attracts, allures, or entices: The main attraction was the after-dinner speaker.
4. a characteristic or quality that provides pleasure; attractive feature: The chief attractions of the evening were the good drinks and witty conversation.