"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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So this is what it feels like.

confusedstate

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I feel like I'm in control of my life for the first time in years. Sex (at least without a connection) means absolutely nothing to me. Keeley Hazell could be standing in front of me naked right now and I wouldn't care.

It's not that I don't look at women or don't find them attractive...it's that I'm thinking with logic over hormones.

I know this is what a lot of people on the site don't want to hear, but that's the true meaning of happiness. You don't have to be abstinent like me, but those who are spinning plates or constantly looking for a new woman for sexual purposes will never be happy.

I felt like there was a demon inside of me. I was interested in very boring/snobby women just because they had a good body. The women I masturbated to, if they knew me in real life, would want nothing to do with me or most guys.

I feel like a lot of the guys on here are supplicating to women by learning tactics or strategies to be more "alpha." Even if it works...you're just supplicating to the power of the p***y and giving her more of an ego boost and making it harder for guys who actually want to date her...because either she becomes arrogant, or she's paranoid that you're some guy that's going to hump and dump.

Let me also clarify, I'm not advocating "love" or anything like that either. You don't need a woman in your life, romantically or sexually, to be happy. If a woman came into my life that had a face that was my type, was reasonably in shape and our conversations actually went somewhere and we had similar lifestyles, I'd welcome it, but I don't need it.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Chickfight

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I feel you about the overemphasis we put on sex. It empowers the women too much. I'm a victim to it as much as anyone, but I make an effort to not use it for my own gratification, but as a tool to get her attached to me, if I like her. My end goal isn't sex, it's for something that transcends sex, if that's even possible.
Sometimes I wish I could turn my sex drive off, just to make me more clear minded and focus more on things that are really important. Too bad I can't do that aside from castrating myself :D
 

Tesl

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You post a lot of rubbish on this board. But:

confusedstate said:
You don't have to be abstinent like me, but those who are spinning plates or constantly looking for a new woman for sexual purposes will never be happy.
I do this and I'm mega happy. Couldn't be happier infact.

I don't plan on dating lots of girls forever, but until I'm mid thirties why wouldn't I? If I happen to meet the perfect girl in that timeframe then of course I could choose to be exclusive, but I'm putting myself under no pressure for that.
 

confusedstate

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If you're not lying and really do bang a lot of women...you're either just doing it for quick pleasure or because you feel validated and wanted and "cool" by having sex with many women.

If sex wasn't as "taboo" as it is and hot women just knocked on a guy's door and had sex with him like in porn and didn't want anything out of it, would it mean as much to most guys on this site?
 

Deadly_Ripped

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What's wrong with doing it for quick pleasure? As long as one isn't misleading about it, how can that be bad?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Big Overseas 1

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To the OP -

Yeh, good point you made. A lot of guys who spend a lot of time on seduction sites instead of self improvement sites end up one sided a lot of times. They can get just as addicted to chasin' ppusssy as girls get chasin' attention.
 

confusedstate

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Deadly_Ripped said:
What's wrong with doing it for quick pleasure? As long as one isn't misleading about it, how can that be bad?
For me it hasn't been satisfying. The only time sex was good for me is when I slept with one of my exs, but that was because it was more of a bond and not the getting off.

The handful of one night stands/flings I've had have been dissatisfying.
 

Packers2010

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@ op

you make a good point. i feel the same as you tho i haven't had sex yet. lol. decided to wait. witch is a most people will think is a mistake but in the end it will mean more to me.

Big Overseas 1 said:
To the OP -

Yeh, good point you made. A lot of guys who spend a lot of time on seduction sites instead of self improvement sites end up one sided a lot of times. They can get just as addicted to chasin' ppusssy as girls get chasin' attention.

this is true.
 

confusedstate

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I want to clarify that I'm not anti-getting women or anti-sex and am not trying to convert anyone into sainthood.

I just realize that 90 percent of the problems on this board would be solved if the guy thought with the right head. Guys chasing women that are otherwise low quality just because they think she's "hot." Guys putting up with drama just to get p***y. Guys trying too hard to get sex for the sake of having sex as a notch on their belt. Guys thinking they're cooler than everyone else because they pursue casual sex and thinking all men that don't are AFC.

Average Frustrated Chump has the word frustrated in it for a reason, and that's what a lot of guys are on this board, frustrated, over not getting p***y, having to put up with b.s. to get p***y, not getting a girl they otherwise wouldn't want if it weren't for their hotness.

I just think a lot of guys associate getting a lot of women or having sex with a lot of women as "making it in the world" since it takes a certain amount of skill (or alcohol) to even get a slvt as even slvts are picky.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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confusedstate

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I think a lot of guys on here are just caught up in the chase and the conquest...more so than actually wanting sex with any girl.

Sex, from my experience, with women you aren't into, is just blah...and usually comes with drama anyway.

Sex with a connection (and I'm not even necessarily talking about being in love) is much better...at least the one time I experienced it.

A lot of guys on here just want sex with lots of women because it represents power or a challenge. This isn't the 1970s where people streaked and the world was one big orgy...so guys think "Wow I'm cool because I'm talking a slvt into having sex with me."

I just get frustrated when I read all these posts and 99 percent of the time it's obvious that the guy is just thinking with his d*ck and going after some low quality woman and then complaining about the ensuing drama.
 
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