CapedCrusader, you are now probably going to receive last piece of advice that will be directed to you in a humane fashion:
Stop posting, start reading.
Browse through the Archive of this forum, as well as the tips section. Read the posts that are linked in the DJ Bible. Read the posts by Pook and Anti-Dump. Do a search for The Book Of Pook and download it. Much wisdom that one contains. Buy some self-help books whose titles you find recommended in the posts you encounter. And read them.
Then get off the forum and go out there and experience life. Don't use all the tricks you just read about, just do what you think is right. Fall flat on your face many times you will, and this is good. You will learn from it. You'll soon recognize what is said in all the material you just read and you'll change.
This will take a year minimum. Expect it to take two at least. Maybe three.
Hey, what can I say? Change takes time. If you aren't willing to change, then you better start being happy as you are now. Is that what you are? Happy?
But the key is: stop posting here and stop asking for help. It's of no use anymore, people aren't going to help someone who doesn't show signs that he's helping himself. You'll just attract more flak and flame. And rightly so.
Now, whenever you feel down and confused, come here and read inspirational posts again to elevate your spirit. But don't post. You're on your own. That's an important lesson you must learn:
Expect nothing from anyone but yourself.
Depend on nobody but yourself.
You create your life because everyone else is busy creating theirs.
Go out, live your life, make it the life you dream of and report back when you have done so.
Or get professional help. A counselor or a coach, to guide you. You won't really find that here.
DO IT.
Good luck.
