So if I am "the great catch" then....

[dudewut]

Am I still supposed to approach girls? If I am such a catch then would that mean that I shouldnt even try?

What is the point of asking them out then? Why go to a date? What is the goal of that date? Like, is there a point as to why I should do that?

wouldnt they (the women) ask you out?

 

[Iceberg]

Women don't have balls. And it takes balls to ask someone out.

Some girls can muster up the courage to make a move on a guy they like, but I damn sure wouldn't expect it routinely. They drop the hints, we pick them up and take action. That's just how it is. Testosterone. Estrogen.

 

[dudewut]

I am talking about outright not texting back, at least they would text back to the great catch right?

 

[Iceberg]

I am talking about outright not texting back, at least they would text back to the great catch right?

Well, not if they don't like you, they won't.

I mean, no matter how great a catch you think you are, you're not gonna win 100% of the time.

This thread is confusing because it seems like you're talking about a specific situation without letting us in on the details. So I'm gonna use my imagination....

You're saying that you asked a girl out, she didn't respond, and you don't see why she wouldn't respond, because you're a great catch.

Well, maybe the girl doesn't think you're a great catch. You're selling a product. And your product has two values. It has the value that YOU think it's worth. And there's the value that SHE thinks it's worth.

And I'm sorry if I'm totally wrong on what you're trying to say. But like I said, you need to be clearer in whatever the hell you're getting at.

 

[PDubb75]

Just because the DJ theory states that you should be "the great catch" to be a true DJ, doesn't mean you automatically are.

It is a mindset, a lifestyle that you need to adopt. It takes work to get to that point. Just because you read threads on here saying that, doesn't simply make it true. It is mentioned as a goal and how you should view the situation.

If you don't believe it to be true, you won't come off as a great catch to her. She's not going to simply see you and automatically think that when she feels that she is actually "the catch".

That last fact is exactly why approaching is still needed. Along with what Iceberg said. You need to show her that you are, in fact, a challenge to her, and something that she needs to win over. Not the other way around.

 

[Xanthus]

Iceberg is right.

I've pondered about that in the past. I would wonder that if a lady is interested in me, why doesn't she just ask if I'm available to go out sometime. Now that I look back, I've been thinking in a way of how easier that would be. Less effort on my part. You know, going the path of least resistance.

That's not a good mind frame to have. Truthfully, if you think you're 'the great catch', then the better way to prove that would be to go and approach those ladies you say may be interested in you and set up some dates. THEN, others will notice and pursue you.

In the end, you have to go for it. You can't just expect them to flock to you with their phone numbers in their hands.

Xanthus

 

[PapiChulo]

Women might not have the balls to ask you out, but they are always keen on making themselves available and putting themselves in situations or places where they are around you. If she doesn't do it she has no real interest in you. I had AWs giving fake IOIs but showing no real interest in what I do or where I hang at. Keep that in mind. So it's actions before words, and they should be interested in your person and making herself available. It doesn't take balls to simply have a friendly convo with a person, does it? Believe me, they can make it pretty obvious for you or simply drop a hint. It's only some really high value women that won't do it or extremely shy insecure b!tches.

 

[sstype]

Women might not have the balls to ask you out, but they are always keen on making themselves available and putting themselves in situations or places where they are around you. If she doesn't do it she has no real interest in you. I had AWs giving fake IOIs but showing no real interest in what I do or where I hang at. Keep that in mind. So it's actions before words, and they should be interested in your person and making herself available. It doesn't take balls to simply have a friendly convo with a person, does it? Believe me, they can make it pretty obvious for you or simply drop a hint. It's only some really high value women that won't do it or extremely shy insecure b!tches.

Good post man. God, I hate hearing this "women don't have balls" cop out in order to justify female arrogance, insecurity, and poor flirting skills.

I have had women approach, give initial IOIs, and make the first move on me before. I have seen it happen plenty of times with guys i know. Don't be fooled into thinking women are helpless creatures that need constant hand-holding from us guys all the time. They are perfectly capable of taking initiative and being assertive. If its not already blatantly obvious just look at higher education and our workforce today.

More female doctors, lawyers, young professionals, and yet they are utterly incapable of showing interest to a man?

Do you not see how pathetic women become around famous celebrities and musicians?

"Women don't have balls"
100% grade A bullsh*t.

Women are not stupid. They know a great catch when they see one, and act accordingly.......so if you're not getting that kind of response then you're not as great as you think you are.

 

[sstype]

double post

 

[dudewut]

Thanks for the replies, but I am actually saying that according to the theory your mindset should be that you are a great catch if that is the case then you shouldnt have to do anything and women should instead approach you, however DJs also preach that you should approach a girl.

I am kinda confused on how you should rationalize approaching if you are a great catch. Its kinda the opposite of being a great catch if you approach them and ask them out, because again, what is asking out a girl for if you are such a catch?

Example; I see a girl, I want to talk to her BUT how do I do so while still being a great catch? To me you kinda lower yourself (thus not being a great catch) when you go over there and approach a random woman and eventually ask her out.

 

[cablecow15]

Good post man. God, I hate hearing this "women don't have balls" cop out in order to justify female arrogance, insecurity, and poor flirting skills.

I have had women approach, give initial IOIs, and make the first move on me before. I have seen it happen plenty of times with guys i know. Don't be fooled into thinking women are helpless creatures that need constant hand-holding from us guys all the time. They are perfectly capable of taking initiative and being assertive. If its not already blatantly obvious just look at higher education and our workforce today.

More female doctors, lawyers, young professionals, and yet they are utterly incapable of showing interest to a man?

Do you not see how pathetic women become around famous celebrities and musicians?

"Women don't have balls"
100% grade A bullsh*t.

Women are not stupid. They know a great catch when they see one, and act accordingly.......so if you're not getting that kind of response then you're not as great as you think you are.

having a good job doesn't mean you have balls , by the logic you have just shown, all doctors and lawyers are great with women. Having a good career and being educated do not equal balls lol balls are more likely found in the trashy trailer park women.

 

[MainDroite]

Thanks for the replies, but I am actually saying that according to the theory your mindset should be that you are a great catch if that is the case then you shouldnt have to do anything and women should instead approach you, however DJs also preach that you should approach a girl.

I am kinda confused on how you should rationalize approaching if you are a great catch. Its kinda the opposite of being a great catch if you approach them and ask them out, because again, what is asking out a girl for if you are such a catch?

Example; I see a girl, I want to talk to her BUT how do I do so while still being a great catch? To me you kinda lower yourself (thus not being a great catch) when you go over there and approach a random woman and eventually ask her out.

Because being a great catch includes not being afraid to talk to anyone - including that girl. Because when you are a great catch, you are fearless.

 

[Xanthus]

Wow, now I see how I got to be careful how I word things here.

To Sstype, when I said Iceberg was right, I was agreeing with the gist of that statement he made. Yes, it's true that society is moving towards things being on a more level playing field between the sexes, working careers being a prime example. But throughout time, the woman expects the man to take things to that next step. We may have more bold women now than ever. If they're in the high paying fields, that alone may have given them the boost they need to go after who they want. But for your average, nature is still nature.

To Dudewut, re-read what PapiChulo wrote. I'm not putting you down when I say this, but just standing there thinking you're 'the great catch' isn't enough. It's like you're expecting them all to run after you. In order to get closer to that belief, you've got to create that vibe during interaction. Then just ask her out and see what happens. Don't let the rejection get to you though. If you feel you're worthy, keep that vibe alive and try again on a new prospect.

Xanthus

 

[Veridin]

The grocery store around the corner has customers entering all the time, looking for its goods. Why should the personnel go out to try to woo new customers when they don't have to? But they keep the door open and display the goods prominently.

 

[dudewut]

In order to get closer to that belief, you've got to create that vibe during interaction. Then just ask her out and see what happens.

BOLD: see now, its a lot clearer! oh and thank you veridin and iceberg as well

The grocery store analogy helped make it a lot clearer.

 

[Xanthus]

Very good analogy Veridin. I'd like to elaborate on that a bit. I think Dudewut is trying to reason with being 'the great catch', but is starting from scratch. If you're new, then thinking you are isn't enough.

Let's go back to the supermarket theory. Let's say Shop-O-Rama has been in business in town for the last fifty years. Of course there will be established clientel. Just recently though, Food Fest has set up shop a few miles down the road.

Here's a new store that has the same amount of goods as the tried and true Shop-O-Rama. Many people are hesitant about shopping there, so Food Fest runs commercials on radio and TV, starts sending out weekly circulars in the local newspaper and has hired food sample preparers to get folks interested in what's being sold in store.

What I'm saying to Dudewut is that he has to be out there and make his rounds by being social and interactive to get attention in return. After awhile, he'll be established and by then will already know he's got 'the goods'. He'll have his pick of women because he's proven his worth.

Not a prob Dudewut. Glad to help. Keep your cool knowing your own worth. Just don't overdo it, meaning don't pump ego. If she doesn't like what you're offering, then that's her loss.

Xanthus

 

[PapiChulo]

It all boils down to value and ability to properly display it. In reference to Icebergs post, this value thing is a double aged sword. On one hand, your self-worth or self-esteem or whatever you want to call it differs from what women perceive. You may stare in the mirror at yourself with a smile thinking: "Boi, I love this guy. He is cute, honest, has integrity, has will, has two degrees and artistic talents" or whatever you think makes you such a catch.
But let’s not forget that women are far shallower than that at the beginning of a potential hookup. What she sees is this:"Ok. He looks decent, possibly cute. Is he truly confident or does he simply put on a show? Has he style? Do other women notice him? What is his earning potential? Does he stand out among other men? How can he make my life/social status/economic status/emotional and sexual life better? Can he control me? “ In other words, it is all about her and what you can do for her, not you, because women are inherently selfish and jealous creatures. I could pretty much point out that women don't really give a f^%k about your personality, values, originality and coolness at first. And smarter women are also able to determine whether you are just posing. There better be a prove for that high value you are trying to pass.

Here is how I put a value on a woman, as probably the better half of men do as well: 1.Looks. 2. Personality, because I want to have an illusion that she is original and good, quality in comparison to the rest of pus$y. It is all simple, and they know their worth, because every cute young girl who is a 7 knows that she is in the group of the desirable ones. But would you be able to honestly say that you are a desirable man yourself? Such as being in elite shape, having financial stability, being a master seducer, being popular such as an artist or a musician, having charisma/experience, having character?
Well, it depends on a woman and this cute girl, who may not even be as cute as you are, may actually think that you are somehow below her - and the funny thing is that she actually has grounds to feel entitled to certain quality of men according to her logic. So being cute does not cut it anymore-you better be freaking built. Yet, a cute Swiss guy will easily get an attractive American woman because western women perceive them as "rare" - thus more valuable.


Buyer's price and seller's price are rarely on par. If it is not selling itself, you gotta learn how to sell it.