So I meet this girl Friday night....

[Zunder]

and get her number.
Call her next day and set up a get together on Sunday.
Pick her up take for a bit to eat and a couple beers.

All goes well, good rapport, she leans in and kisses me passionately when I drop her off.

Call her home number Tuesday and not home.

She texts me that she is out with a friend "catching up".

I text back saying I will take her out Friday night.

She texts back that "she would like to" but "I am catching up with a girlfirend Firday night, how about another night?".

SO I text back saying " I don't play second fiddle to a girls girlfriend, postpone it with her or work both in".

As yet no reply.

I am using the premise that if her interest level is REALLY high enough, she would postpone with her girlfriend and short of a death in the family or a nuclear war she would see me.

As yet no reply so I take it that her girlfriend is more important than seeing a man, so her interest level is just not high enough to see me again.

Any thoughts.........

 

[Tazman]

It seemed too much like an ultimatum. I would have said "maybe some other time" and left it at that. If she never called back or counter offered I would then leave her alone.

 

[scorpio1138]

hhmmm. she did make a counter offer.

but since you said what you did, I would not contact her.

Let her do it. Just stick it out and if she's interested she will contact you.

 

[synergy1]

She counter offered, and you shot back with a insecure girl response. Should have said np and gotten another time to hang out. Plain and simple. She clearly had plans w/ her friend and would have been disrespectful canceling them. To me this is the signs of someone with some integrity.

 

[cordoncordon]

Seemed rather harsh to me. Girls don't like possessive guys, and that is how you came across here. If I was a girl and a dude said that to me when I really was seeing a gf catching up? NEXT would be the term that would come to mind.

 

[jophil28]

SO I text back saying " I don't play second fiddle to a girls girlfriend, postpone it with her or work both in".

Zunder, that reply was way too harsh and demanding.

She is a new woman, and you are NEW to her too. She will have several G/fs in her committee ,and her relationship with them are long established and very important to her.
DO NOT ever challenge a woman's relationships with others like you did.. A new woman willl eventually prioritize you automatically as you become important to her. This process takes time - it takes more that one date and some kissy face in the front seat.

Ironically, you can bet that YOU were going to be the main subject of their conversation on Friday night.
Probably they will still discuss you but not in a way that you would like.

Live and learn.

 

[squirrels]

What Jophil said. How can you expect to pull a power-play like that?

 

[Zunder]

She texted me before and said she is easy going and is not used to my sort of behaviour.
I relented and said sorry did not mean to upset you I wont contact you again.
She texted back saying she will call me tonight and tell me why my texts were so wrong.

Either way, I have apologised, ceded her the upper hand, and I think any relationship with her will be doomed.

I thought I was being strong, but what you guys have said, I was being weak.

All I needed to say was "yes OK, how about next week sometime".
Yet I go in hard and give her an ultimatum.

I have fvcked up yet again.

But, I will let you know what she says after she calls tonight.

 

[cordoncordon]

She texted me before and said she is easy going and is not used to my sort of behaviour.
I relented and said sorry did not mean to upset you I wont contact you again.
She texted back saying she will call me tonight and tell me why my texts were so wrong.

Either way, I have apologised, ceded her the upper hand, and I think any relationship with her will be doomed.

I thought I was being strong, but what you guys have said, I was being weak.

All I needed to say was "yes OK, how about next week sometime".
Yet I go in hard and give her an ultimatum.

I have fvcked up yet again.

But, I will let you know what she says after she calls tonight.

Don't be so hard on yourself, you seem really emotional for a guy. First with her, and now with yourself.

If you talk to her, just say you were having a bad day and you will make it up to her. But stop overreacting to everything. If you have ever seen Entourage, try and act like Vince did before he got involved with a porn star and drugs. Just relaxxxxxxxxxxx.

 

[Zunder]

Don't be so hard on yourself, you seem really emotional for a guy. First with her, and now with yourself.

If you talk to her, just say you were having a bad day and you will make it up to her. But stop overreacting to everything. If you have ever seen Entourage, try and act like Vince did before he got involved with a porn star and drugs. Just relaxxxxxxxxxxx.

Yip will do.

Guess I am over-reacting because first women I met in a while that wasn't displaying weird behaviour.

A long time since a woman has kissed me that passionately without me initiating, then she holds my jaw and says "you are so, so....." then she stopped short and got out of the car.... don't know what she meant to say but figured it was going to be a compliment.

Then the text drama last night.

I hate cell phones and the ability to text...doubt I would have said what I did over the phone.
I have a track record of fvcking up with texts...thats why I feel like slapping myself because I knew she was into me.

 

[Warrior74]

She texted me before and said she is easy going and is not used to my sort of behaviour.
I relented and said sorry did not mean to upset you I wont contact you again.
She texted back saying she will call me tonight and tell me why my texts were so wrong.

Either way, I have apologised, ceded her the upper hand, and I think any relationship with her will be doomed.

I thought I was being strong, but what you guys have said, I was being weak.

All I needed to say was "yes OK, how about next week sometime".
Yet I go in hard and give her an ultimatum.

I have fvcked up yet again.

But, I will let you know what she says after she calls tonight.

See the part in bold. Now why do you think she would do that? If you offended her, she wouldn't call, and if she's such a massive bytch that she wants to dress you down you should move on...but if she comes off somewhere in the middle...there is your interest. Don't wuss out. Don't try to be a boss yet. Find some balance between dominate and polite. Personally, that line suggests 'gina tingles warring with feminist/girlfriend talk. How you play determines which side wins.

 

[jophil28]

She texted back saying she will call me tonight and tell me why my texts were so wrong.

Either way, I have apologised, ceded her the upper hand, and I think any relationship with her will be doomed.

If she calls you tonight and calmly explains why your texts upset her then she is willing to give you another shot and is ok with getting past this after a "chat" . My take is that she has a higher level of INTEREST than her level of resentment, so you have done some good work so far. Her 'gina is still tingling in the background but she is hurt/ confused about why you worded your texts in such an aggressive way.

However if she calls and gives you some femi-nasty rant and plays 'victim', then just hang up - it is done.

BTW, there is a huge difference between being dominate and being domineering.

 

[SweetDannyJ]

My bad. Wrong thread

 

[Young Juan]

bros before hoes, chicks before ****s...that's basic with a chick you haven't fvcked yet. Once you fvck her, you can get her to go out with her girls, get a little twizzy and then come to ur place for drunk monkey sex.