"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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So I Choked

scrouds

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I guess twice.

Went to the doctor's on tuesday, needed a cup of coffee, so someone at the office recomended going across the street, so I went. Chatted a little with the HB behind the counter of the cafe, kind of a 3 way conversation with her and someone she knew, with me joining in. I didn't have much time to stick around (Excuse #1), so I left.

Went back to the hospital for a chest x-ray, decided I'd go back across the street for more coffee. Started joking with her about the coffee, saying she made the coffee, down to roasting each individual bean (ok it was funnier in person). Fixed up my coffee, she was talking about thank god its friday, and that's where I should have did something. But I didn't. Paid for my coffee and left. She told me to have a good weekend.

Damnit.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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eaglez1177

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Go back there another time and see how it goes!
 

scrouds

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Yessir. I will go back wednesday (taking mon and tuesday off). I guess girls working in shops, idk for whatever reason have always been harder for me. Some mental block.

I want to work myself up to 100% when I see someone I like, cause if you don't try, you don't get it. But this one is getting to me. I mean massive eye contact.

I'm thinking I need to set up some type of structure, to have something to fall back on, a routine, even if that is distasteful to the way I like to do things.
 

zekko

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The problem I have with girls working in shops is they have to get hit on all day long. If you go in somewhere it just seems the default to flirt with the girl behind the counter. Then again, a lot of girls work in shops, so I wouldn't exclude them.
 

eaglez1177

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If you're thinking of coming up with some plan or routine on what to say to her, give up now cuz that will never work. You already know this chick has something for you, so that in itself should give you plenty of confidence when approaching her again, rather than having to be a chicken and come up with a "plan".
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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