"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

So how do i know if i'm in the friend zone?

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
There's this girl that i really like and i think she really likes me, but i can't really read her. For instance she beggs me to go to church w/ her even though i tell her i can't and she still persists. Another situation would be when were flirting she always puts a right.. at the end of it.
a conversation would go like this.
her: my day was pretty bad but now it's going a lot better
Me: it's cause your talking to me right ? :D
Her: exactly, lol jk
Is she really jk? She does this all the time and always initiates conversation. I barely know this girl. Would it be a good idea to ask her to go to a movie w/ me or something? And if so how?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

WC2

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 29, 2006
Messages
1,700
Reaction score
69
Location
New York City
How do you know? Next time she says "right" you tell her you are right and go right in for a kiss close. This is a sure way to see if you're in or out of the friendzone. Doing rather than thinking is a good motto when it comes to women.
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
see this would work if the only place where i see her isn't at church...... Idt it's a good idea to do that there. I talk to her on the phone and through facebook mostly. So if i'm not in person what do i do
 

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
Yeah,it would be odd to start making out at church.If you want to find out if you are in the friendzone,ask her out on a date.If she accepts,and she knows that it's a "date"date,then there's your answer.Another way to tell is if the 2 of you have been spending a lot of time together with nothing romantic happening,or if the 2 of you talk a lot on the phone,and she talks about her feelings,other guys,or if she tells you how nice and sewwt you are.
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
well those two things haven't happened yet. And like is said she constantly asks me to go to church w/ her and told me i should take her to my church. But isn't that like friend-zone stuff???? Or does it mean she wants me to actually take her out. I tend to **** around like an idiot
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
I would just straight up ask her out.The instant you do that,you'll find out where you stand.I don't think her inviting you to her church is friendzone stuff.She may be inviting you because she does like you.Maybe her inviting you to her church is her way of asking you out.You see what I'm saying? she might be too scared or shy to ask you out on a date,so instead she invites you to church.
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
lol, i'm sick of being an afc. Next time she calls i'm asking her out. if i don't i want you guys to shun me forever
 

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
Bingo!!!!
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
I'll fill you guys in on how it goes. What exactly should i say? any ideas?
 

Scars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
2,126
Reaction score
1,002
Age
36
Location
Phoenix
WC2 said:
How do you know? Next time she says "right" you tell her you are right and go right in for a kiss close. This is a sure way to see if you're in or out of the friendzone. Doing rather than thinking is a good motto when it comes to women.
QFT.

You wanna know how you know if a girl likes you or not? You take action. If she rejects you, then no. Big deal. If she doesn't then yes, congrats. :)
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
whoah dude wtf is this about.
She was talking about what the sermon was about and i asked this.
Me: what exactly was said about romantic dating
Her: it makes things awkward for friends and

break ups are messy

and it causes a lot of heartahce

and basically the same stuff i figured out form experience

which sux

wow i just blew it...
 

Scars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
2,126
Reaction score
1,002
Age
36
Location
Phoenix
Or maybe she's just really insecure and looking for reassurance.

Stop over analyzing every damn thing she says. Take action!
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
dude well i think i just f#### up. What do i say?? I don't want to sound like an idiot
 

Dink

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 23, 2001
Messages
182
Reaction score
0
Location
Central Illinois
you are sounding like an idiot now. grow some nuts and do something. you can only embarass yourself if you feel that you are embarassed. you are only a f**k up if you feel that you are a f**k up. plain and simple. put those stupid thoughts aside and just go for it. a friend of mine for 4 years i actually started hitting on her and eased into hitting on her. she bit on it hook line and sinker. She even gave me the "are you hitting on me? lol" line and i replied with "Yes, do you like it?" and what i got was in return was "Yeah I do so when do we get to hang out?". I mean things fall into place so easily it'll make you sick and realize how easy a situation really can be.

forgot to mention another time I used the worst line possible on a girl. I was fairly drunk and i'm sure made the situation more at ease for me, but i blurted out to another girl "wanna make out?" and she was all about it. sometimes man stupid stuff or ridiculous things you dont think are going to work do. it's all about how to present yourself to the girl. so in conclusion it doesnt always pertain to being confident have a goofy sense of humor or good presentation of words helps too. you need to work on your own technique find what works for you. first things first though. stop worry about what might happen and go for it. =)
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
i asked her out.... Calm down dink...... I got rejected though lol. She said something like she actually "likes" me alot, but isn't ready for a bf. W.e this is prolly just an excuse. But at least i tried, and i don't feel bad about it
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Dink

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 23, 2001
Messages
182
Reaction score
0
Location
Central Illinois
I apologize if you thought i was being a bit intolerant with you. I wasn't. What she said was probably a easy way out for her so you dont take it the wrong way. so basically yes she did say no. any reason beyond that was to soften the blow if there was any.
 

r0cky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2008
Messages
1,046
Reaction score
30
Hey man you should always go for the kiss before you ask them out. Now she thinks you're just some chump who falls in love with any girl that flirts with him. If you had kissed her then you could've sparked some attraction in her and it also shows her you have the balls. But libe and learn.
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
lol man i wasn't in love. But i tried and that's more than some people can say. At least i put myself out there
 

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
Right on,Jokerisk. You are 100% right. I couldn't agree more. I'm proud of you man. I guess when you said that you were tired of being an afc you weren't joking around. Hey man,don't let thiis one girl get you down,and yes,that line about how she's not ready for a bf is a load of crap,too. Hey man, if I were you, what I would do is examine the time where you asked her out to see if you made any errors or mistakes anywhere.
To be honest though,the best thing to do would be to examine everything from the moment you met her up until when you asked her out. Trust me,you'll want to find out if you screwed up somewhere,because if you did screw up,but don't know where it was or what it was,it WILL happen again.Over and over again,until you find it and fix it.And believe me,you don't want that to happen. I know this from experience.It sucks to fail over and over again and not know why. And when you do finally find out what the problem was,it turns out that it was something easily correctable.So yeah,congratulations. Some might say,"Why are you congratulating him,he didn't get the date. He struck out". Imo,you can't "strike out in dating". The only people who lose at dating are the ones who give up.They are the only ones who lose. Even afcs have girlfriends.Even they have relationships.Even they have some women interested in them at times.The only difference is that when they are successful,they stumbled into it.They did the right thing by "accident".They don't know what they did right.That's it.So my advice to you?Examine this interaction,learn from it,then come out swinging again.
 

Jokerlsk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
646
Reaction score
5
i honestly want to know why i'm always the "friend"? I swear to God i don't even act afc. It's like all of the normal girls like the jackasses and all of the *****s like me. I don't want a ***** for a gf. Damn, i'm so sick of this. The only girls i can get are the *****s!!!! And i don't even talk to them! They hit on me! I'm not a bad guy, i don't do drugs, i don't have sex....... Maybe if i start i won't be just the friend anymore.......
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Top