"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

So after 5 years I think I've finally figured it out

Demystify

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I've had so much trouble getting girls over the past 5 years and I've been really frustrated and angry lately. So I've really been taking a look back at what I've been doing wrong. Now I think I've got it all figured out as to what I need to do.

- It's a numbers game, the more girls you approach the better.

- Don't get stuck on one girl, if you even feel close to stuck, move on. Also, if you start arguing with her, forget it and move on. Arguing with a girl will NEVER lead to better things. You can't argue your way into bed.

- Only pursue girls that you know for CERTAIN are definitely interested in you. I capitalized certain because some girls are really good at faking interest. So only pursue girls that are DEFINITELY interested in you. If you aren't sure whether they are faking interest or not, move along. Don't put any effort in girls that aren't interested.

- If a girl is a b1tch at all, run the other way and ignore her COMPLETELY. I've noticed that girls that I've had the most frustrations over are the extremely b1tchy ones. So if I avoid the b1tches I'll have less frustrations. And I mean COMPLETELY IGNORE them.

- Don't compete with another guy until you've gotten really good with women. If you see her with another guy and she looks really interested in him don't bother until you're an ultimate Don Juan. Competing with another guy and losing is more frustrating than not competing at all.

- Work out. I've been kind of against working out because the guys I see with girls are NEVER muscular. But I think working out is more for mental reasons than physical reasons. Working out makes you more positive and takes away frustration, anger and jealousy.

- Don't rely on drugs or alcohol. I need a clear mind to be a ladies man.

- Get her completely alone. This one is kind of obvious but doesn't always seem very clear. Being with more people offers more opportunities for other guys to c0ckblock. Being with more people also means more opportunities for you to screw up. By inviting a girl to hang out alone at your place, you are testing her level of interest. A girl more than likely won't go over to the house of a guy she really dislikes. And if she doesn't put out by a few visits to your house then move on.

- Never ask for her number. Let her give it to you. I've never had luck with the girls whose numbers I've asked for. I have had luck with the girls who have given me their number first.

- Stay positive and act like you've never gotten rejected.

- Aside from eye contact, body language, and posture, DON'T focus too much on your appearance. You're never going to look like Brad Pitt so don't go out of your way to try.

Like I said, this is all from past experience with women that was really bad. It's pretty much what I've learned from my mistakes, you could say. I'm still really awkward and a little negative, but I think working out and not pursuing girls that clearly aren't interested in me will help with that aspect.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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TKool

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Demystify said:
- Only pursue girls that you know for CERTAIN are definitely interested in you. I capitalized certain because some girls are really good at faking interest. So only pursue girls that are DEFINITELY interested in you. If you aren't sure whether they are faking interest or not, move along. Don't put any effort in girls that aren't interested.
Do you wait for girls to say "hey, I'm interested in you. Come talk to me!"

How do you know when they're definitely interested?
 

teacha

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- Only pursue girls that you know for CERTAIN are definitely interested in you. I capitalized certain because some girls are really good at faking interest. So only pursue girls that are DEFINITELY interested in you. If you aren't sure whether they are faking interest or not, move along. Don't put any effort in girls that aren't interested.
Never pursue a woman. I dunno maybe you used the wrong wording there.

Don't compete with another guy until you've gotten really good with women. If you see her with another guy and she looks really interested in him don't bother until you're an ultimate Don Juan. Competing with another guy and losing is more frustrating than not competing at all.
Never compete with another guy over a particular girl even if you reach 'ultimate don juanism', rather it should be the other way round, women should compete for you.

Never ask for her number. Let her give it to you. I've never had luck with the girls whose numbers I've asked for. I have had luck with the girls who have given me their number first.
Some girls will not offer you their numbers because of different reasons (she may be shy etc), so you gotta ask for their number ALWAYS. Like you said earlier, its a numbers game and if she says no its on to the next one.....
 

Demystify

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teacha said:
Some girls will not offer you their numbers because of different reasons (she may be shy etc), so you gotta ask for their number ALWAYS. Like you said earlier, its a numbers game and if she says no its on to the next one.....
Well, I think it's a good way to weed out girls that are just attention seeking. Plus I've done better with girls that have given me there number first instead of me asking for it.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Jhcl4000

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Demystify said:
- Never ask for her number. Let her give it to you. I've never had luck with the girls whose numbers I've asked for. I have had luck with the girls who have given me their number first.
I don't agree with this one.
 

Maxtro

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Overall a good collection of information.

Teacha, how do you expect to get a girl if you never pursue them? Do you think they would approach you, get you interested, get your number and then try to make plans with you?
 

Demystify

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TKool said:
Do you wait for girls to say "hey, I'm interested in you. Come talk to me!"

How do you know when they're definitely interested?
I don't know. I just kind of get this vibe from girls that like me. I've noticed a good way to tell is to compliment them. I'm not saying you should worship them or anything, just a light compliment. If they crack a smile at all when you compliment them, they're usually interested. If they keep a straight face and they don't react at all when you compliment them, they aren't interested. But like I said, I make the compliment really light and not so generic.
 

Ease

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TKool said:
Do you wait for girls to say "hey, I'm interested in you. Come talk to me!"

How do you know when they're definitely interested?
Yes, thats what they are saying when they give you an IOI.

Thats what the OP is saying. Eye contact is the best thing in most cases. Its usually the most common invitation.

She will never say those words, but she will lock eyes with you for a second across the room.

Id say i disagree with the number. I think getting the number, initiating the conversation, first kiss, escelation are all for the man to do. You should be leading, you will feel more comfortable and she will feel more attracted, to me it feels more natural. If you're brad pitt she may hand you her number, but even brad pitt loses a small number of points for not pushing forward and asking for the number.

^Taking the lead is completely different from chasing. You should never let her get comfortable or show too much interest, thats what kills it.
 

Demystify

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Well, maybe not so much that you shouldn't ask for the number, but you shouldn't ask for the number like you need it and you shouldn't act like getting her number is a huge deal. Like if she's about to leave and she's walking away don't chase after her and say "HEY, LET ME GET YOUR NUMBER." Needily getting a girl's number shows that you don't do that well with girls. Ladies men don't make a huge deal out of getting a girl's number. That's why I like to let her give me the number first so I come off as not needing her.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Lexington

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Some girls won't make it obvious at all that they're interested even if they are. Some girls are just shy. If you get obvious signs of rejection, move on. But not all girls will make it obvious that they want you. They want you to be a man and to take the lead. Make the ho say no.

I think the most important think is to not give a fvck about rejection. If it doesn't bother you, then you have no problems hitting on a TON of girls and really playing the numbers. If you seriously hit on a 1000 girls, chances are, you would land a SERIOUS hotty even if your game isn't super tight....it's simply due to the laws of probability.
 

Demystify

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Lexington said:
Some girls won't make it obvious at all that they're interested even if they are. Some girls are just shy. If you get obvious signs of rejection, move on. But not all girls will make it obvious that they want you. They want you to be a man and to take the lead. Make the ho say no.

I think the most important think is to not give a fvck about rejection. If it doesn't bother you, then you have no problems hitting on a TON of girls and really playing the numbers. If you seriously hit on a 1000 girls, chances are, you would land a SERIOUS hotty even if your game isn't super tight....it's simply due to the laws of probability.
Well, I think going for a girl that you thought was interested, but wasn't interested AT ALL is the worst thing that can happen. To me that's way worse than a simple "no" rejection. So I try my best to weed out the girls who might do that.
 

teacha

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Maxtro said:
Overall a good collection of information.

Teacha, how do you expect to get a girl if you never pursue them? Do you think they would approach you, get you interested, get your number and then try to make plans with you?
im just saying, I DON'T CHASE HOES. im too lazy for that ish and i got better things to be doing with my time.
 
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