So a random girl from drunken night 2,000 hunts me down and says shes having my kid..

[Moofahsa]

Bout two months ago I got a little toasted at a friends house, shacked up with this girl...left and went along with my business. Never knew anything other than her first name. She lived over 2 hours away and was here for a family event and it was understood it was what it was.

Flash forward to now and I get this weird phone call from a girl saying to call her at this number on my voicemail. I didn't recognize the voice and she actually had to explain to me who she was. I got the "I am pregnet...*CRY* *CRY*" Needless to say I drove 2 hours to "make sure" since I learned from her friend she already has a kid and is on welfare...at 19...and her friend told me she is a money grubber hardcore. (My family is very well off)

I took a home preg test with me and ask her take it, sure enough it was positive. We had a short conversation, I said I'd pay for an abortion if she was okay with that and she said "no". Hm...

I told her I have no problem paying for a paternity test while she was still pregent (quoted at $900) and she said she have to look into it...and ended up tossing the idea because the complications that can happen...which I understand.

Basically I'm pulling my hair out here, she is not someone I want to have a kid with.

Anything I can do here? Or am I just gunna have to man up and wait the next 7 months in agony and shame my family?

 

[Interceptor]

You shouldn't even think about doing anything without a Paternity test proving you are the father.
A Paternity Test or nothing. Non Negotiable.

 

[sexybeast]

You shouldn't even think about doing anything without a Paternity test proving you are the father. A Paternity Test or nothing. Non Negotiable

Agreed.

F*cking girls!!!

 

[Shivastorm_88]

Agreed with those guys. Without a paternity test there is NO WAY to prove you are the father, so until you have done it, you do not owe her ANYTHING... not even the abortion (then again the abortion probably costs less then paternity test so it would be the best option to chose since if you do the test it'll cost you 900$)

 

[Obsidian]

abortion is wrong, imo, but you definitely should get a paternity test before you become the daddy

I don't really know how those tests work tho. You might need to wait 'til the child's born like she says.

 

[Bible_Belt]

You won't owe support until the kid is born, anyway. If your family has money, they can get you a lawyer who can probably put the child-support bill on hold until the test results come back; also the attorney should be able to force a test after the kid is born if she refuses. There's a very real possibility that you are not the father, and she is just picking the richest guy out of the bunch. You just have to wait and see.

 

[socalrunner]

shouldn't have called her number!

 

[speakeasy]

shouldn't have called her number!

LOL!

Yeah, never pick up the phone at 4am and never call back some random girl you slept with months ago!

 

[Analytic]

You din't use protection with this girl?

 

[Alphamale1821]

just wait 7 months and put in a call to the maury show. They do free paternity all the time on his show.

 

[penkitten]

1. tell her to call you when it is time to have the baby because you want to be present.
2. if she calls, go and when the baby is born, see if she will consent to a paternity test right then. if yes, you get your answers, if not, tell her your attorney will be serving her papers to get this dna test done asap.
3. when dna testing is completed you will go to court to establish custody/ visitation and support if the child is yours.

4. STOP doing chicks that you do not want to have calls like this from.

 

[penkitten]

just wait 7 months and put in a call to the maury show. They do free paternity all the time on his show.

sheesh thats low.

 

[Obsidian]

STOP doing chicks that you do not want to have calls like this from.

Seriously...Have a little respect for yourself, man.

 

[Serialized3]

Man, Moofahsa, with all the drama in your life you need to get your own reality show.

 

[B4IFURU18?]

Whether or not the abortion is right or wrong is a whole other topic that probably shouldn't be discussed.

I know I'd want her to get one, and I'm not so sure it's the right thing to do.

As for the pat-test, she owes that to you, especially if you're paying it. It's EXTREMELY selfish of her to decline. As of now, you owe her nothing. For all you know, she got knocked up by one of the other 5 dudes shes raw dogging...

I wish you luck.

 

[socalrunner]

yea seriously man....the kid might not even be urs....if shes had a kid before that probably means she has sex with alot of other guys...

no glove????????????

 

[theunflushables]

My ex's dad refused to sign birth certificate in case he didnt stay with her mom. Maybe rules have changed though.

Anyways, if it is yours fight for custody. If she's on welfare and you can support the kid, you'd be more fit to be the parent.

In case you find yourself in this situation in the future. Use the best protection there is: a fake name! :crackup:

 

[The Juan and only]

So not only did you not use any protection, you gave her your fvckin details as well? The fvck dude?

Bottom line, you're fvcked. You'll just have hope the kid isn't yours (which it very well could not be from the sounds of it).

Sadly the family courts are heavily gender biased in favour of women. Force her to get that pat test and pray, else say hello to outrageous child support payments for 18 years.

Good luck dude, I hope it turns out the best for you.

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

she said she have to look into it

There is nothing to look into. I am not a doctor but I am assuming a paternity test is relativley painless and conclusive, and if you are paying, then it should be a question of her saying "when" she is going to take it not "if" she is going to take it.

The sooner you have her take it the better. If you are not the father, forget her, and let her deal with her own problems. If you do turn out the be the father, then you'll have to start thinking about what you'll do then.

But if you aren't even sure, GET SURE, and then proceed. Don't let your head get filled up with b.s. thoughts and feelings in advance that will cloud your judgement. If you aren't the father, she may be counting on your clouded judgement to not question the baby and do what she wants you to do before you realize it.

And the law in the US is messed up so much so that if down the road many years later you find out you are not in fact the father, you will STILL be liable for child support past, present, and future. (ex: you will still have to continue making child support payments to a kid that you have now confirmed is not your own!)

Your to-do list should be simple for the next few days

1. Get her to take the paternity test.
2. Get results as quickly as possible.

I know what you may be going through right now as I've had some close calls myself (late periods, not actual confirmed pregnancies), I doubt you will be in a state of mind to do anything else but the two things above.

 

[Ken785]

Is there laws that say you ABSOLUTLY have to take responsibility if you get a girl pregnant? i mean if both sides cant agree to having a baby...why should the man have to suffer 18 years of child support? what if you knew she was a golddigger that just trapped you on purpose? i know some girls out there take responsibilty even though they barely knew the person that knocked them up...like in that new movie Knocked Up, while others are like fvck it...give me your money for 18 years theres no way im staying with you (which i feel is irresponsible on their part)