"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Smoothe sailing tonight!

Armand

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I was at dinner rally earlier this evening, a political-type function. Now, I went there specifically for that purpose, but when I got there - politics was the last thing on my mind. I never would have expected that many 20-25 y/o women there, compared to the same lot of men. (BBJ-Looked to me like it WAS about 4:1 ratio in the room, in my age group) Five or ten minutes after getting there, a (22-24) redhead (my weakness) walks by casually and..

Me: "Hi" with a smile
Her: "Hi" returning a warming smile.
Me: Have you met [The Candidate's Name] yet?
Her: I haven't had the pleasure yet, but I do hope to meet him.
Me: Pause for a moment of silent eye contact and a bigger smile
Her: a bigger smile
Me: What's your name?
Her: Big smile- I'm [Pretty Hot Redhead].... And you are...?
Me: I'm [DJ Armand]
Her: It's a pleasure to meet you DJ

I started to ease my way into the DJ by asking about her interests in the party functions, why she's there tonight, college, where she's from, etc, etc. I pretty much had her talking 80-90% of the time once I got her started.

By the time I was getting ready to ask for her home phone number (about 1 hr, hour and 15), she was sitting closely doing the "forearm touch" each time she laughed out loud - which was quite often. Well, to make a not-really-that-long-of-a-story short, I said (in a tone that let her know I was wrapping up and moving on for the night): "Well [Pretty Hot Redhead], I enjoyed meeting and speaking with you
" and before I could really get any further she had her hand in her purse grabbing a pen out of her checkbook. After securing the # and closing, I then made my exit directly.

There's another party on election night (Tuesday) that i'll probably call her on and ask if she'd like to go. I think her interest was high enough to warrant calling a day or two sooner than usual. After that, I think I should give her a little while to marinate, so to speak.
Maybe calling the following monday for a wednesday evening bite to eat and coffee. By then, provided things continue as plotted, her interest should be through the roof in two weeks because:

1) I did not and will not appear too eager, hungry, desparate, etc., but scarce.

2) I'm only asking her out on weekdays for the next 2 weeks = mystery and challenge, she's going to be wondering why i'm only asking her out on weekdays evenings. Soon enough, she should start hinting around about the weekends.

3) I did not respond to her initiating touch tonight = self-control.

4) I made her laugh the entire time we were together tonight - emotion

Any imput, anyone?


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Definition Of Insanity: Doing what you've always done and expecting things to change.

[This message has been edited by Armand (edited 11-04-2000).]
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Anti-Dump

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Perfect Don Juan.

This should be in the Hall of Fame.

Her "forearm touch" said that you hooked the big fish.

All the nice guys here should paste this to their bed post and start DREAMING this stuff.

The woman should follow YOUR lead. Later, down the road, you work together and things become mutual.

Interested women WORK with you in the very beginning.

AD
 

Poet

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Nice goin Armand, you played it well.....but in response to the touching, as a sign of interest I (personally) really don't read a lot into that cause some women touch all the time. I mean I was talkin to this barmaid that was on break last night & she touched (grabbed) my forearm to emphasize a point & we had only known ea. other for 5 minutes!

I work with women all day long (lot's of them) so I see their social interaction skills / techniques frequently & there are women who are very comfortable with touch & use it a lot. But I think you are playin it right she sounds interested....keep us posted.....Outa here, Poet
 

XCMan

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You are da man!
 

BigBadJon

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Just goes to show that sometimes the least obvious places can be your best bet.

1.The guy/girl ratio couldn't be better.
2.It was a social function, but I would assume that most of these women would be relaxed and not have the b1tch sheild up.
3.You had a ready made conversation topic.

Now I'm jealous!

Pat yourself on the back for me.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Armand

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Thanks everyone, for your comments


It feels great not finishing last anymore


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Definition Of Insanity: Doing what you've always done and expecting things to change.
 

Armand

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Originally posted by Poet:
Nice goin Armand, you played it well.....but in response to the touching, as a sign of interest I (personally) really don't read a lot into that cause some women touch all the time.
You should, though. Women only touch men they are comfortable with, but you have to take into account everything else - not just the touch.


I mean I was talkin to this barmaid that was on break last night & she touched (grabbed) my forearm to emphasize a point & we had only known ea. other for 5 minutes!
Well there you go, she was engaged with the conversation and wanted to emphasize her point. You have to consider the woman, though - her body language, tone of voice, etc. A barmaid is in a unique position, she's used to conversation after conversation with men in that social atmosphere - she's probably more comfortable with light touching of hands and arms than most women, in that environment.


I work with women all day long (lot's of them) so I see their social interaction skills / techniques frequently & there are women who are very comfortable with touch & use it a lot.
In that work environment, everyone knows most everyone, and usually for quite some lenth of time. So the level of comfort there is mostly very high because of familiarity.

If you have doubt about a particular one, watch her for some length of time and see how she interacts with other men. If she displays light touching with many of them, THEN I would not consider it a buying signal towards me.


But I think you are playin it right she sounds interested....keep us posted.....Outa here, Poet
Oh, I know this one's interested.


Thanks for the imput Poet.

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Definition Of Insanity: Doing what you've always done and expecting things to change.

[This message has been edited by Armand (edited 11-04-2000).]
 

bashful

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Question: how come everytime i do everything that dude did it never works for me?

He just talked about the basic rules of the game.

How come it never works for me.

Also,i find it quite convenient that,that "hot redhead" just so happened to be single.

( dont you guys think thats luck on his part?)
 

bashful

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How the freakin heck are yall doin it? I do all that stuff still nothing for me. i mean seriously...i gotta know lololol
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Serg897

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I love this post. This is a textbook example of what the perfect initial interaction with a woman should be. This one was a promising candidate from the very beginning.
 

Topstarclub

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yeah! how many that!
 

Topstarclub

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:cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
 
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