Smiths Journal

[smithersonb11]

What up, smith here.

Time to finally start a journal to try and force myself to get better faster. Going into senior year (again) in 3 weeks. Most people know of me, girls mainly, but don't actually know me. I'm not going to have a ****ty year, I gotta meet people, make new friends, get new girls. 3 weeks is a very short time. My only goal in the next 3 weeks is to get a stronger frame, I'm going to leave this year a legend.

About a year ago my friend introduced me to Keys to the VIP. Got interested, stumbled across mystery, read The Game. Instead of running out and painting my nails black, I just got a pink boa and went with some friends to a costume party as a male stripper. I realized pretty quickly the whole PUA stuff wasn't for me, too much to remember and to me it took the fun out of interacting with people. It did give me the motivation to atleast try though.

Show up to the party, talk to a few people. Quickly find myself in a group of friends I know well. Get drunk, realize playing it safe wont get me anywhere. Turn around, see my friends girlfriend. She's hot. Talk to her for a while, have her crying in laughter. Go to the washroom, meet some girl. Call her my bathroom buddy. Hit on tons more girls, most have boyfriends (they never mention them, but they're all at the party). Im sitting down with some old friends when bathroom buddy sits next to me, then on my lap. Constantly leaning in close to my face, sharing drinks, rubbing my leg, etc. Guess what? I did nothing. Could have dragged her out of there right then and there. Or atleast made out with her. Still an improvement from a month earlier where I sat at a table with a bunch of people, barely said a word, acted bored, while the hottest girl there started hitting on me. She basically proposed sex. I did nothing. Not the first time either.

Point of the story? Alcohols a massive crutch to me. It really is liquid confidence. Without it I'm quieter, less direct, more boring, less hilarious. My main goal is to be able to hit on girls as easily and well while I'm sober. Not saying I'm going to quit drinking, I love having a good time, but I want to limit it to occasional, as of right now its way too much. I'm thinking its just basically man the **** up and do it sober, a little while of that and It'll become normal. If you have any advice on this though let me know? It's by far my biggest issue.

I plan on updating this journal daily (or whenever I go out, hopefully daily). When school comes around I want to be confident af. I'm here to learn.

 

[smithersonb11]

Might as well start off with yesterday.

Went into the city with a friend. Pretty uneventful day. Last time I went I got over 10 numbers just for self amusement, one hit me up to be FWB, it's too far though. Hour trip each way, nobody else wanted to go. I wasn't going to sit around all day in the suburbs. Drop some M, then pickup some much better stuff from my usual source. Head to the city, hot girl on the train staring, I just say hi. Just as I arrive it hits me. Quickly realized whatever I took was cut heavily, not grabbing from that friend anymore. I was more down than up. Tired, and anti social. Not at all what I was expecting

Walking down the street towards the mall, tons of people everywhere. Hot girl handing out free samples of deodorant. Offers one to me. "You trying to say I smell bad? That's rude. You just lost my business." Flirt a minute, continue on, boring. Get to the mall. Being checked out left and right. *****ing out left and right. Buy some things, grab some drinks. Leave after a few, head to buy a bottle of booze for later, drinks are too expensive. Get confused, ask these two blondes where the liqueur store is. They say they'll take us there if we'll buy them booze. Both 16, not that cute, whatever, we agree. Flirt a little, friend goes in while I wait with them. Gay guy hits on me. Ends up not being able to get the booze. Oh well, I ask this group of girls later if they'll buy for us, they do, invite us to jays game with them. Only one of the three is hot, we pass.

Sit down for a bit near a tour bus area, friend goes to find food. Tons of asian girls. Lots of them staring and pointing and giggling. I do nothing, not cool. I offer a jolly rancher to this hot blonde, she declines. Who the **** says no to free jolly ranchers? Decide we'll drink on the streets until the clubs start opening up. Turns out the venue we planned on wasn't all ages this night (it is sometimes). I tried to talk my way in, had the bouncer laughing and about to let me in, manager or owner or something comes down. Oh well, theres other places

Quickly stop in the movie theater. Really hot girl working the tickets. She's behind one of those glass walls with the speaker and ****. Ask where the popcorns at, before she even answers tell her she has a super attractive face and is the "epitome of my type". Shes all smiles and loving it. Her coworkers see what's up and go into the back. Joke about how she works at a movie theater so she must make great popcorn. She says she does. I tell her she can make us some awesome popcorn and we can cuddle up to my favorite movie, the notebook. She's 19. (I'm 17, allowed a 3 year age difference when under 18 in canada). I tell her thats perfect, a year older and she couldn't legally have sex with me. It'd be rape. You don't want to be a rapist, now do you? She's laughing. I make fun of her for her name being spelt wrong on her nametag. Tell her my names spelt wrong (it is), we have so much in common. Slide my phone under the glass where the money goes, she adds her number. Tell her I'm taking her on a romantic date to mcdonalds, or at the very least, next time i visit the city, we'll hookup. I would, she's crazy hot. (By this point, I was buzzed)

Find out that we dont have a ride back unless we take the next train. Overall, boring night.

Bachelorette group of girls gets on the train, all early 20's. I was all, oh **** we're on the attractive people train, whats up attractive girls. The ones who heard laughed. Chose not to get up and sit with them, stupid. Missed out.

Drop half what I did before of the M from my usual source. It's amazing. Oh, forgot to mention. I asked probably 20 people for weed, was funny. By the time I found it I figured might as well wait until I get home.

Get home, at around 3-4am I get a text from my friend I haven't seen since the graduation party. She's drunk. Starts rambling about how she's had a crush on me since grade 9. Complimenting me, etc, etc. Not at all interested in a relationship right now, and she's not that attractive. Quickly turn it around into being awesome friends. One thing though, she has a car, most of my closer friends don't. She also has a hot friends. One of which also likes me, wanted me to go to prom with her, again, not all that attractive (to me, lots of guys think she is though).

Question - This seems pretty long to me. Too long and detailed or what? Also, I won't be posting word for word conversations, they're too long, just the highlights. I also dont remember them.

 

[LearningSlowly]

So even your day game is on drugs? Try going sober for a little.

Other than that, great work. Youre ballsy, but I think you're suffering from the same problem I often have. Stop putting on so much of a show, tone down your outgoing-ness and add more normal conversation so people can actually see you as being part of their lives in the future. Good stuff though.

 

[smithersonb11]

So even your day game is on drugs? Try going sober for a little.

Other than that, great work. Youre ballsy, but I think you're suffering from the same problem I often have. Stop putting on so much of a show, tone down your outgoing-ness and add more normal conversation so people can actually see you as being part of their lives in the future. Good stuff though.

Yeah I self-amuse too much, need more intent if anything. Another part of it is these girls live pretty far away, so the chance of something coming from it is pretty slim to begin with. Definitely true from when I'm in my area though.

Friday night - Pretty boring. Just a night in the suburbs. Looked for parties, nothing happening. Just smoked some weed and chilled with friends pretty much all night.

Girl texts me asking me to come out to where she lives. I met her a month ago, she lives about 40 minutes away in a touristy area I go to kinda often. I approached her, turned out she was only 15 (looks older, pretty hot). She texted offering a place to stay the night so I figure its pretty much on if I choose. At the same time shes 15 so im on the fence about it.


Saturday - Go to soccer game with a friend who's really shy. On the way into the stadium I hit on some girl giving out coupons.

After the game there was a huge festival going on around, so decided to check that out. One of the girls working a carnival game said she'd let me play, for free, and would get me a prize even if I didn't win. Flirted a bit.

Went to a mall, got considered for a job at A&F. Hit on one of the hot cashiers, no point in grabbing her number, lives too far away.

Girl texted me again offering the place to stay, saying anytime this week. Easy lay. Still not sure about it since she's on the younger side. Will see though

 

[apocolipto]

Bro I'd fvck her.If she turns you on. lay her.