"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Smack Me

T

TopDeadCenter

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I was seeing someone for a while, but it wasn't a great relationship. During that time I met a really great girl, and I got the idea she and I could have some potential.

She worked in another part of the building, and one day she disappeared. Someone told me she got another job, and they told me where.

After that my relationship ended.

It has been a few weeks now, and this girl has been on my mind. The only way I can reach her is to call her where she works, remind her who I am, and see if she is interested. I just feel like a bit of a freak doing it.

I would have asked her out in a snap if she was still there where I could see her in the office. Now I have to jump through this extra hoop, and I'm not sure I have the nerve to do it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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D

DoctorLW

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Just do it. No harm in trying. Even if it is weird, what's the worst that can happen? Nothing serious I can think of. It's just your basic fear of rejection.

Just go for it man.
 
T

TopDeadCenter

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It's kind of weird how my state of mind shifts. Sometimes I'll hunt a girl down using the least little clue as to who or where she is, not caring what anyone including her thinks about it. And I'll get a date out of it. Then there are other times when I'm as timid as a little mouse, and wouldn't ask a girl out if she had my name printed on her shirt with hearts.

I'm always waiting for those times when I'm unstoppable, but they don't come when I need them.
 
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