"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Slapping my face playfully still disrespectful?

Deadly_Ripped

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Been seeing this girl for a little over a month. Was at a Halloween party and wispered some dirty stuff into her ear about what I'd like to do to her in one of the other rooms if it was empty. She playfully slapped my face with a smile/shocked grin on her face (no force but very quickly) and I just smiled and sat back in the couch. This was in front of some mutual friends, and they might've noticed but she clearly wasn't upset and neither was I.

She did it again when we were in my room because I made some ****y and dirty comment towards her again. Then, I told her that she was the only person so far who could hit my face without me getting instantly angry. She immediately apologized and said she wouldn't do it again, but I insisted that normally I would freak out but for some reason it didn't phase me, so I told her that it's not something she should avoid doing if she feels so inclined.

I said something else later that night to warrant it, and she did it again. I think she kinda likes it haha

Do you guys let a girl playfully slap your face or your arm? I don't see it as detracting from my dominance, but I'm curious to hear what you all think.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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omega05

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i don't know if i would tell a girl to feel free to slap me when she wants
 

Tyson420

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That would start to get annoying, to be honest. the arm whatever is fine but I don't want to be slapped in the face.
 

Deadly_Ripped

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Yeah, but she kinda freaked out when I told her that normally I get instantly angry. I just figured that it was better than telling her not to do it anymore, because to be honest it definitely made me feel like kind of a macho guy to let her slap me and just smile back at her like "yeah, I did just say that to you, and I'm not apologizing, so go ahead and slap me because it's all you got"

edit: she freaked out by apologizing sincerely and she got a worried look on her face... she kinda hangs on everything I say.

It's totally playful and I don't feel like she's doing it in a disrespectful way. I always figured that women like to be able to slap a guy or punch him without it phasing him because it demonstrates how tough he is and how weak, by comparison, she is.
 

Ridingthelightning

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No sir. I hate that and I've told multiple women off. I've never had a girl hit me in such a way that it actually hurt, but plenty have hit/slapped/punched/etc me in such a way that the act made my fight or flight reaction kick in. I just don't like it and women that think its ok to hit me like that aren't cool in my book.
I've had girls do it and get really upset when I tell them to stop and never do it again. Funny, they get upset as if I did something wrong to them, but I'm just telling them something I don't like and they're not allowed to do it.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Semtex

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^^ If its a playful slap and you act all annoyed then yeah, they have every reason to get upset because they realized they've been wasting their time being playful with a big, sensitive baby.

Seriously, a little playful slap shown to feign 'alarm' or offense (and in anycase, a demonstration of kino) makes you feel like your dominance is in question? You're that insecure?
 

Deadly_Ripped

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I FEEL comfortable with it, but I was curious to hear how other people feel/think about it. I accepted a long time ago that I might not always have the right perspective, so I was seeking some.

But yeah, I'm pretty damn insecure once I find a girl whom I don't instantly lose respect for after the first few dates. It's pretty rare and this one keeps surprising me with new and impressive ethical and personality traits that make her HB8 that much more attractive.
 

Ridingthelightning

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No, Semtex, I am quite secure.
A playful anything is different than a punch/hit/jab/slap/etc. Have you never had someone at any point in your life throw a little too much gusto into a physical movement directed at you that rubbed you the wrong way?
I've had plenty of girls love tap my arms/chest, and even push me in a playful manner which I didn't mind.
But there is a threshold, and I've had women cross it. Such as a girl who slapped me across the face and then 5 minutes later knee'ed me in the junk for no reason. She thought it was funny and laughed about it. I got up and walked out when I didn't feel like puking anymore. Was that the action of a big sensitive baby, or someone who doesn't wanna get knee'ed in the balls? Another f'buddy of mine invited me out on her birthday. She had gotten very drunk already. At some point and time she hit me in the chest a little too hard and I said something to the effect "You better watch it, I hit back" but in a very joking matter, hoping she'd not do it again. She then proceeded to punch me 3 more times, hard enough to leave bruises on my arms and chest. No, I didn't hit her back, just made her feel bad for it and left. Is that the actions of a big sensitive baby?
 

Snow Plowman

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It all depends on YOU

I've personally had a chick doing a 20 hit combo to my chest. All she does is punch me in the chest when I flirt with her. I actually like it alot!!! Just so longs she doesn't cross YOUR BOUNDARIES. In the case of this specific girl she once was grabbing up my face an I had to cut that off because it had crossed the line.

This isn't a question you can really ask a forum since it is all based on YOUR PERSONAL BOUNDARIES. I know guys who would curse out a chick even if it was playful.
 

DonJuanit0

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This is what people do when hearing/feeling something weird and it's called humor! Which actually happened since you told her ****y words! She simply didn't know how to react to those things you said and the easiest thing to do (cause she liked what you said) was to have some humor out of it!

Haven't you guys had a pillow fight, with a girl, for example and then end up having wild sex? It's absolutely normal and not disrespectfull! It would be disrespectfull if you two had a serious convo or an argue!

Have fun with it! :)
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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horaholic

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Pillow fights are WAY different than a slap to the face. I dont mind if chicks bite, pinch, arm punch or whatever, but something about a face slap, I cant stand. Its not an insecurity thing either. I'll bet James Bond wouldnt put up with that. I consider it disrespectful.
 

Deadly_Ripped

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horaholic said:
something about a face slap, I cant stand.

horaholic, I would have agreed with you 100% a five days ago. But this girl has done it three times to me, and it doesn't phase me in the slightest. I think it has to do with a few things:

I am attracted to this girl on physical, emotional, and intellectual levels.
She slapped me without any significant force, such that I had no redness or stinging sensation.
She did it with a smile on her face, and as a direct response to my ****y and fairly lewd comments.


I think that the next time she does it when it's just the two of us, I'm going to spank her.
 

Nexus Polaris

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I would imagine a better show of dominance would be catching her wrist all quick and ninja like before her hand reached your face and looking her straight in the eye with a devilish grin. This way she knows you're in control, it's still playful, AND you don't get your face slapped. Seems a lot more suave to me than just sitting there and taking it.

I will say this, though. Not to raise a red flag here or anything, but any chick that will joke around like that playfully has a good chance of doing it for real when you really do pìss her off since she's already used to you not responding to it. Just something to think about.


I can't help but think how this type of situation might go down the other way around, though. Like if you kept jokingly slapping her in the face as part of your còcky and funny routine.
 

WC2

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Playful slap in the face = Take both my hands, throw me onto the bed and show me who's boss.

Most of a woman's actions is perpetuated by her expecting some kind of response back. She is HOPING that you can respond by giving her a little playful slap in the face. Being that men don't slap women, she's expecting something a little different.
 

Deadly_Ripped

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San Jose, while I appreciate your feedback, I don't appreciate being called a b!tch for asking a question on this website.

No need for that.

You're absolutely right that I didn't really know how to react, but that doesn't make me a b!tch. I didn't feel offended, and my inaction wasn't a function of passivity, submissiveness, or fear.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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