"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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skilld djs please help

duttylove

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ok hypothetical here (actually my situation)

your in a long relationship with a girl and you are attatched to in a certain way. if you broke up you know you can pick up pretty much any other girls you wanted to. when you break up how do you stop that AFC nagging voice in the back fo your mind that says

"i hope she isnt screwing any one else"
"i wonder who shes with"
"did i make a mistake breaking up with her, she means so much to me"

you are well aware that she will be screwing other people, and that is no longer your concern because your not together any more and you do not want to get back together. but that voice is still there.

if you understand what i mean please help me out i need some advice badly
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Pimp-sicle

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Your mentally over the relationship, sounds like you set sail a long time ago, but your emotions are stronger than ever. The way you get over that voice in your head is to eliminate her completely from your life. You shouldn't still call/accept her phone calls, no hanging out "as friends" move on. Go take care of yourself and find a new girl.

It takes time, and its hard but you'll get over it completely the sooner you point your head in the right direction.




PIMP
 

Veracity

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You're in denial

Why would you give a fig if she is sleeping with someone else if you don't want to get back with her???

Stop lying to yourself about your feelings.

These things take time. Keep yourself busy with other, more positive things.

Only time will resolve your feelings.
 

duttylove

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alright thanks guys

i havent actually broken up with my girl, but it is something i want to do.

the only reason i havent is because of that silly little voice. when we break up it will be on good terms and we will probly remain friends but from what ive learned on these boards, eliminating her completely from my life is the best option.
 

CraigMack

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You must be able to be free in your attitude towards women enough to be convincing in the fact that you don't give a F*ck what they do, and that means believing at least somewhat inwardly that down deep you really don’t give a damn if the girl you are f*cking with or used to f*uck with is ****ing someone else.


So what you need to do to play this game is you have to be able to control the natural feelings of jealousy which arise in a man over his possessions - ie..your woman or your ex woman.

As one author wrote don’t end up like O.J. looking through the window while his freaky ex-wife was giving a blow*j*ob to a man on the living room couch while the kids were upstairs.


In other words what I'm saying is keep your emotions on a tight rein. Let it go. Accept the fact that yes she will be f*ucking other men pretty soon and probably sucking his d*ck too.

You don’t want you mentally f*cked up and unable to concentrate at the next day just cause your ex didn’t call you last night or when you freaked out and tried to call her in the middle of the night, you couldn't get through cause all of her phones were turned off.

Don't be like many of the guys on this site and wonderin what she’s doing? and why are her phones shut off!” Stupid, she’s getting f*cked that's what she is doing, just hope that that other ass*hole isn't better at it than you are!


The sooner you get used to this idea the easier it will be for you. She used to be your possession but like a old car that you have sold it's no longer yours.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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nonstop

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So what if she's with some other guy, you're the catch! she'll probably be thinking of you.
 

Dominant

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mASF advice. Go **** 10 other women. You won't give a **** after that.

Been in your position man.

1. No contact at all.
2. Go meet tons of other chicks. Bed as many as you can.

Other than that it just takes time.

-Dominant
 

iCanDoThat

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i am in your exact situation, exact! i am about to break up with my g/f, and have that voice too. it really sucks. well i guess i should say i "HAD" that little voice. over the last couple of weeks, i have been trying to get rid of that voice because i have been talking with other girls and want to date them.

So first i started by hardly ever calling her, and making sure that when we did talk, that it was not a fun or interesting convo. second, i try to hardly every think about her(it is hard) and when i do, i make sure that i only think about our bad times together, lol. im constently associating her with negative thoughts in my head. also a good way to not think about her is to constanly talk to other girls and have other girls on your mind. But most of all, you just have to be really good at lieing to yourself. i'll be honest, i still have feelings for her, but i have made myself 100% believe that i have no feelings toward her and dont give a crap wether she hooks up with ten thousand guys a night. i now also talk to every girl with the mindset that i dont give a flying fvck what they do!

there you go thats my two cents. i hope it helps

peace
 

JonJack

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Those voices you get are called irrational emotions. I believe most people have experienced it before. I too have heard them in my head.

Like what others have said, the best thing to do is occupy yourself with other things. But then, this won't stop it from coming back again in some other situation.

The way I went around this is by asking myself lots of questions and forcing myself to answer them honestly. When I got the answers, I hated it. I couldn't believe that I got so messed up because of it because it was so shallow.

So, start questioning yourself.
 

zolo

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I read you post dude, and that voice is not about you wanting her, it is about your ego.

You hear that voice because eventhough you dont want her, you still want her to want you. you cant accept that she could want someone else.

Chances are if you knew she would sit at home and wait for you, you wouldn't give her a second thought and you would be out dating every chick you see.

Get over the ego, and cut her loose
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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