"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Situation: Need YOUR advice

LiveStrongNY

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Hey everyone,
I met this girl online. Long story short. I get her #, and i give her a call tonight. We are talking a few minutes, i get into topic of lets hang out this weekend. She says saturday night works for her. So instead of saying where we should go, i say where should i pick you up, whats your address. After this remark she says hold on. Then 5 seconds later the line dies. I try calling her back, one ring, and then voice mail. Leave her a VM.

I then go online to AIM, she's there logged in. I ask what happened, she says her phone is messed up, saying the server is busy when she tried calling me back. I offer to call her again, she says go for it. I try, one ring, and voice mail. I then ask her if she has another line, she says she doesn't have long distance (we're not exactly next door neighbors). I then ask her again, do you want to go out saturday, and she says yes. She then suggests we meet at the mall, and I agree. We set a time. I make sure to tell her that I will call her before hand (set for 8:30 pm, so i figure call at 3 or 4??) to confirm that it's still on.

My question is, with all the flakyish activity above, do you think she'll even show up. On AIM conversation, she is not very big on elaborating on responses. Lots of one words, mhmm and ok, yes, no. But i'm not trying to chew her ear off online, i just want to set a date. I'm worried about her not showing up though, with all i already explained. I'm thinking maybe of bringing a friend along, in case she bails, i'll ahve someone to hang out with.. or is that a self fufilling prophecy?

Thanks for any response.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Grimple

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Could be the case.. but doubtful. I guess you wont know until you see her. If she does show up though, then you need to be on your top A game to make up for all the flakeyness from earlier.

Good luck.
 

LiveStrongNY

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I'm also worried she won't pick up my call for the confirmation.. Maybe i shouldn't have suggested that.


O god my game.. well to be honest, i've kind of never been on a real date... I'm kind of a late bloomer.. And i'd say she's an HB 7..

I'm like more concerned with her actually showing up, that i don't know if i'm gonna put any prep into this..
 

Grimple

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Just keep telling yourself she will, because I don't think she is uninterested. Her phone may have genuinly fvcked up.

If she doesn't show then just forget about her, she is obviously a b!tch anyway.

But use the experience (either way it goes) and learn from it. Even the greatest DJs wouldn't know everything they know without failure. Read up on the articles though, especially ones that are date related. Possibly even encorporate some kino. My biggest concern for you is acting too clingy, which is what I think you pretty much accomplished with all the phone bull****.. so don't be an *******, but don't be her lap dog either. If you know what I mean.
 

Phyzzle

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with all the flakyish activity above, do you think she'll even show up?
FUKK. NO.

That is an ironclad guarantee.

But hey, if the mall is close, why not go?

In the future, always ask to meet at a neutral location. I'm not saying that would have made such a big difference here, but you guys are strangers until you meet, so it makes sense to meet elsewhere.

Oh, and none of the "call to confirm" crap.

If she wants to cancel, she can call right? So why call and say "are you canceling?" She can cancel from a payphone if her "phone spontaneously dies" again.
Her phone may have genuinely fvcked up
Talk about the blind leading the blind!!!

She says "hold on" just as her phone dies. Hold on for what? How did she know her phone was just about to -

Oh, nevermind. 500 posts! I've gotta break for a while.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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LiveStrongNY

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I agree, i should not have said that. I think my underlying goal is a hook up here, so i figured pick her up in car, more likely we can end up somewhere secluded. Rather than, we meet somewhere, drive seperately.. where do we go to hook up..

But yeah, the only reason iw ant to call to confirm is that we set the official plans over AIM and to me that is just not concrete.
 

Cod3r

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95% leaning towards a no-show...

Desperate, desperate, desperate... a phone dies, well its her loss, I don't do callbacks or hop online like a little crack junkie wanting another hit of conversation. Confirmation call ?? Can you say 'chump', get the girl to give you a confirmation call, not the other way around bro.

Live and Learn, Live and Learn

PS
Here's a nice little trick tho, since she's def. not gonna show up, call her and cancel that sh*t, that way you can have a little power and integrity. It's like the pre-emptive strike, the BUSH as I like to call it... same thing as LJBF'ing a girl before she LJBF's you, she'll tink... 'wat i was gonna blow him off ?? he's a loser, he can't blow me off' and then wait and see her reaction, i'm sure it'll increase if not who gives a damn



-Cod3r
 

OBSYDYN

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I've been in this situation a couple of times.

Every time, the broad never showed, or even notified me for that matter.

Usually if a girl gives a damn she will let you know.
 

Shiftkey

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You sounded too needy to me. Huge turn off. But I'm not as convinced as these other guys that she will flake - it is entirely possible that she really did have phone trouble (I know I've had it, my cell sucks). I really can't say without seeing your other interactions with her. Though even if she does show up, you've already lost points.

Here's a nice little trick tho, since she's def. not gonna show up, call her and cancel that sh*t, that way you can have a little power and integrity. It's like the pre-emptive strike, the BUSH as I like to call it... same thing as LJBF'ing a girl before she LJBF's you, she'll tink... 'wat i was gonna blow him off ?? he's a loser, he can't blow me off' and then wait and see her reaction, i'm sure it'll increase if not who gives a damn
lmao I recently did this. I agree, it's a good tactic.
 

Scorched

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...

She hung up because you asked for her address... No ifs ands or buts about it...

You met her online, got her number, called, asked her out and asked for her address all in one night? Were you going to tell her you loved her on the first date? Sorry if I am being a d*ck bro... But you have to play hard to get some... Just for the first 3 weeks... Present her with a challenge... etc...

The good news is you found this forum early in the game.
I spent the past year 1/2 going through about 25 girls before I got a good grasp on the game. The first few owned my ass... Talk about learning stuff the hard way... I'm not saying this forum will turn you into a pimp, but at least you'll learn from others mistakes. As said above, read read read...

Good Luck
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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LiveStrongNY

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this actually did not happen over the course of 1 night. I met her "online" like monday.
 
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