Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Sissy Boy

suki

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Hello guys. I'm new here and what I am about to describe may disgust you and turn your stomach, so I'm giving you fair warning to back out if you do not want to read this. I'm posting my intro here because I am in my 50's and hope that other older gentlemen with a good heart will accept me.

I am a sissy boy. Not going to lie to you. I've been feminine most of my life and wonder if I even should have been born a male. No I'm not gay, I love women. Ever since I was a little child I had feminine traits about myself. The way I walked, gestured and even talked you would have thought I was a girl. Was always a follower whenever playing with my male friends. They made the decsions and I followed. Did not play with dolls or anything like that, I still played boy stuff, you know all army men, cowboys and indians, cops and robbers. My passive nature was a big henderence in meeting girls or even talking with them for that matter. A very quiet person. Always was teased by girls and boys for being so quiet.

When I was a teen my passive nature increased and all throughout high school I did not have even one girlfriend at all. Yeah I had friends but even they did not want much to do with me since I was so quiet. This is the time when I started really questioning about my gender and if I really was suppose to be a boy or a girl. Grew my hair long at this time and many people would think I was a girl. They would come up to me and say "excuse miss". All through my high school years I was Mr. Nice guy with people I met. Always agreeing with whatever they said. I was brought up to be nice to everyone. There was not a bad bone in me. I even babysat the neighbors kids because I had no social life.

I managed to get through high school and attended college. In college I met one girl and ended up blowing it with her. I was too nice to her and she said we could be friends. During college I kept to myself and only had one other friend who was just as bad off as I was. Took a part-time job in a resturaunt and the waitresses would say that I was such a nice boy. None would go out with me. At this point in my life I felt like killing myself. I had no need to live anymore. Took up running to ease the lonliness and pain I was going through. Was still very nice to everyone and had those feminine traits about me.

When I left college and started working I had to do something about my social life. Took a job with a trucking company and noticed a girl there that I liked. Finally had eneough nerve to talk to her. I asked her out and she told me she was not interested in me that way. Mr. Nice guy does it again. I was in so much emotional pain while working there that I left. Moved to another part of town and took on another job. All this time I was still very quiet and kept to myself. Many times when I would walk home from work people in their cars would laugh at me and whstle because of the way I walked. I was constantly being called gay.

To sum this up I am stil a very quiet man. Was married once and that is because the woman liked submissive, weak men. She found me and we maried. She thought she would be able to change me. That did not happen and we ended up getting divorced. As I was saying I am still a very quiet man, living alone and not saying much to anyone. My neighbors do not even talk to me. I am here becasue I want to better myself and to become a real man. I ask you men that have experience and are older, do I have a chance? I've been nice and a sissy almost all my life, is there any hope in reversing this? I've read the DJ bible countless times and all the other ebooks that are out there. I also work out in the gym but never gain any muscle mass. So my question is, do I remain a sissy boy or is it possible to become an Alpha Male? Thanks. Please be kind in responding
 

iqqi

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First of all, stop labeling yourself.

You are a quiet man, there is nothing wrong with that. Why are you quiet? Answer that first.

Second, you walk funny. When you say you walk and talk funny... that is something that you CAN change. Why don't you? And when you say you walk funny, do you mean like with a switch, and a sway, like the "stereoptypical" gay guy? Do you talk with a lisp? Do you have a deep voice?

Why did you grow your hair long?

When you were married, did you enjoy sex with that woman at all, atleast in the beginning?

I will help you. Answer those questions first.
 

suki

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iqqi said:
First of all, stop labeling yourself.

You are a quiet man, there is nothing wrong with that. Why are you quiet? Answer that first.

Second, you walk funny. When you say you walk and talk funny... that is something that you CAN change. Why don't you? And when you say you walk funny, do you mean like with a switch, and a sway, like the "stereoptypical" gay guy? Do you talk with a lisp? Do you have a deep voice?

Why did you grow your hair long?

When you were married, did you enjoy sex with that woman at all, atleast in the beginning?

I will help you. Answer those questions first.
Thank you iqq.
Ok, I'm not a sissy boy, I sure feel like it though. I mean wouldn't you if you lived like I do? For the first question. 1. I'm quiet because I usually have nothing to say after hi. My short term memory is not the greatest anymore so when I do read something interesting in a magazine or newspaper that might be good for conversation, I lose it. It escapes my memory. I can do small talk and all but that is it. I tend to bore people alot, thus I remain quiet. I'm also not very quick witted so trying to be funny is out of the question. 2. I've tried to change the way I walk. Watched other guys and how they walk and tried to imitate the same but to no avail. I still walk like a girl. Yes the swaying and all. I'm not gay. No interest in guys at all. No I do not talk with a lisp and I do have a deep voice. 3. I grew my hair long because that is what was popular in my teen years. Most guys wore their hair long. 4. In the beginning I did enjoy the sex with my ex.
 

iqqi

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OK. I know some effiminate men, heck I slept with one once. He was very sensual. I thought he was gay at first, but he wasn't! LMAO...

Oh, I'm a girl, Suki. Why did you pick the name Suki? It is kind of girlish?

Anyways. So you are quiet because you have nothing to say. SO you have absolutely no interests? No passions in life?

What interests you? What do you think about and do all day? What motivates you?

Most conversations are overrated. As long as you are good at small talk, then that's good! Most people who are talking are reminiscing on mutual memories, or sharing personal stories, or gossiping, or exchanging information. That is what talking is, for communication. Don't think everyone around you is having some deep life changing conversations that lead to sex and relationships. And don't force it. Small talk is good. And then when you meet someone who shares some interests and passions, you may find yourself in a more passionate discussion, yourself. Hasn't that ever happened? Besides that, as long as you can do the every day chit chat thing you are ahead of most people. Is this correct?
 

Survivor

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I have another question for you, suki.

Do you have any male friends?

If so, ask them for help. If not, deal with that issue first before seeking any relationship with any woman. You need some mature, understanding, masculine men, who understand your plight and will mentor you, and help develop a more attractive, more masculine persona.

Changing personal behaviors is hard for older men, I'm not going to lie to you. But it sounds like you need to change some things about your appearance, demeanor and mannerisms such that people respond to you more favorably.

Google up some articles about western masculinity and developing good male friendships.

Hope that helps, bud.
 

suki

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Thanks for your advice Survivor. Yes I do have some male friends and believe it or not they are just as feminine and Mr. Nice guy as I am. Not a good example for me to follow at all. I will need to find some masculine men as friends this is true. Will try googling the Western Masculinity as well.
 

Latinoman

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iqqi said:
OK. I know some effiminate men, heck I slept with one once. He was very sensual. I thought he was gay at first, but he wasn't! LMAO...

Oh, I'm a girl, Suki. Why did you pick the name Suki? It is kind of girlish?

Anyways. So you are quiet because you have nothing to say. SO you have absolutely no interests? No passions in life?

What interests you? What do you think about and do all day? What motivates you?

Most conversations are overrated. As long as you are good at small talk, then that's good! Most people who are talking are reminiscing on mutual memories, or sharing personal stories, or gossiping, or exchanging information. That is what talking is, for communication. Don't think everyone around you is having some deep life changing conversations that lead to sex and relationships. And don't force it. Small talk is good. And then when you meet someone who shares some interests and passions, you may find yourself in a more passionate discussion, yourself. Hasn't that ever happened? Besides that, as long as you can do the every day chit chat thing you are ahead of most people. Is this correct?
I hope you realize that you are giving advice to a person that might be of Japanese heritage (for all we know, he is from Japan or other Asian culture/country) and who is potentially dealing with people of his own culture.

But then again...I don't expect you to figure out that he probably picked the name "Suki"...because he might be Asian? And it might have a meaning in Japan?

Never mind.
 

iqqi

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I just asked. Why would I look up someone's user name when I could just ask? I swear some of you just jump on a chick because you have nothing better to do. He isn't Japanese, LM. Guess how I know? Cuz I mofo'n ASKED, and he has already replied. Good job on offering the man advice, though! :rolleyes:

Suki, you know where to go. :)

I'm out.
 

ElChoclo

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If you are in fact 53 and not a troll you deserve some response. Do you have a chance? On the limited information, very hard to say. Hard to change a personality at your age though.

You need to persist with the gym. Muscle mass can be built/maintained at your age. The exercise will increase your testosterone. You probably have low levels though. You would need to go easy on the running if you want to build up. It is not rocket science though. Increase protein, increase weight amounts. If nothing else you will build strength.

I suggest that you take up a martial art. You will probably cop a beating due to a lack of aggression but it could help with self confidence.

Instead of trying to completely change your personality, you should work with it. Understanding oneself is the first step to self control.

Take up some hobbies which probably don't feature in your current collection. I suggest that you join some hunting and fishing clubs. These are traditional male activities.
 

kingwilliam

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I personally think you should see a phsychologist. What if there were medications that would help improve your social anxiety?

Perhaps clinical depression has played a role in the way you have perceived yourself?

I know people who at one time had similar characteristics to you, and with therapy made drastic improvements in the their quality of life.

If you were in a social setting and had a couple of beers, would you be more interactive? This is not a relevant question, I am just curious.
 

slaog

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suki said:
Hello guys. I'm new here and what I am about to describe may disgust you and turn your stomach, so I'm giving you fair warning to back out if you do not want to read this. I'm posting my intro here because I am in my 50's and hope that other older gentlemen with a good heart will accept me.

I am a sissy boy. Not going to lie to you. I've been feminine most of my life and wonder if I even should have been born a male. No I'm not gay, I love women. Ever since I was a little child I had feminine traits about myself. The way I walked, gestured and even talked you would have thought I was a girl. Was always a follower whenever playing with my male friends. They made the decsions and I followed. Did not play with dolls or anything like that, I still played boy stuff, you know all army men, cowboys and indians, cops and robbers. My passive nature was a big henderence in meeting girls or even talking with them for that matter. A very quiet person. Always was teased by girls and boys for being so quiet.

When I was a teen my passive nature increased and all throughout high school I did not have even one girlfriend at all. Yeah I had friends but even they did not want much to do with me since I was so quiet. This is the time when I started really questioning about my gender and if I really was suppose to be a boy or a girl. Grew my hair long at this time and many people would think I was a girl. They would come up to me and say "excuse miss". All through my high school years I was Mr. Nice guy with people I met. Always agreeing with whatever they said. I was brought up to be nice to everyone. There was not a bad bone in me. I even babysat the neighbors kids because I had no social life.

I managed to get through high school and attended college. In college I met one girl and ended up blowing it with her. I was too nice to her and she said we could be friends. During college I kept to myself and only had one other friend who was just as bad off as I was. Took a part-time job in a resturaunt and the waitresses would say that I was such a nice boy. None would go out with me. At this point in my life I felt like killing myself. I had no need to live anymore. Took up running to ease the lonliness and pain I was going through. Was still very nice to everyone and had those feminine traits about me.

When I left college and started working I had to do something about my social life. Took a job with a trucking company and noticed a girl there that I liked. Finally had eneough nerve to talk to her. I asked her out and she told me she was not interested in me that way. Mr. Nice guy does it again. I was in so much emotional pain while working there that I left. Moved to another part of town and took on another job. All this time I was still very quiet and kept to myself. Many times when I would walk home from work people in their cars would laugh at me and whstle because of the way I walked. I was constantly being called gay.

To sum this up I am stil a very quiet man. Was married once and that is because the woman liked submissive, weak men. She found me and we maried. She thought she would be able to change me. That did not happen and we ended up getting divorced. As I was saying I am still a very quiet man, living alone and not saying much to anyone. My neighbors do not even talk to me. I am here becasue I want to better myself and to become a real man. I ask you men that have experience and are older, do I have a chance? I've been nice and a sissy almost all my life, is there any hope in reversing this? I've read the DJ bible countless times and all the other ebooks that are out there. I also work out in the gym but never gain any muscle mass. So my question is, do I remain a sissy boy or is it possible to become an Alpha Male? Thanks. Please be kind in responding
So you have trouble getting friends and relationships as well as talking to people. The answer is obvious when you think of it... if you want people to like you then you must first like yourself. It doesn't happen the other way around you have to change your thoughts.

Start off by accepting yourself , the way you are and then try and improve things. By constantly trying to change yourself and thinking about how you are what you're doing is fighting against who you are and that won't help all that will do is make you dislike yourself even more. So accept yourself first then it'll be easier to change things.
 

wjh

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Maybe some synthetic testosterone would do the trick... Definitely think you should see a psychologist.
 

Latinoman

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iqqi said:
I just asked. Why would I look up someone's user name when I could just ask? I swear some of you just jump on a chick because you have nothing better to do. He isn't Japanese, LM. Guess how I know? Cuz I mofo'n ASKED, and he has already replied. Good job on offering the man advice, though! :rolleyes:

Suki, you know where to go. :)

I'm out.
Go get some ****tails and drinks. I bet you were drunk when you posted in here too.
 

hithard

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suki said:
I've read the DJ bible countless times and all the other ebooks that are out there. I also work out in the gym but never gain any muscle mass. So my question is, do I remain a sissy boy or is it possible to become an Alpha Male? Thanks. Please be kind in responding
How deep are your pockets???

Psychologist probably the way to go to get an idea of what you’re up against. If you go to the gym get a personal trainer (human contact). Join a few clubs toast masters or something similar and in things you enjoy. There’s plenty of these dj boot camps around just explain your situation. While it sounds gay a Fashion consultant can do wonders to how you look as well. If you’re in the U.S they seem to have a consultant for everything and while it can cost big $$$ I think you might learn faster from an uncomfortable real life environment then just introverted cyber and reading.
Glancing over your background I think you need to be forcing yourself into social situations more to stop being self conscious. The way you view yourself also has to change along with your habits and social fears but a shrink would give you a better plan than I.
 
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