"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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single forever...

kutbaf

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Hey guys,

so, I can't seem to attract girls, or i always seem to lose the attraction. Usually things start off well with a girl, but in every situation they always lose interest, and i get the feeling i just annoy them, or whatever.
It is horribly frustrating. How can I found out what I am doing wrong?

thanks :)
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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betheman

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How old are you? give us some background? looks personality, job/student?
 

kutbaf

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well, i'm 20 years old, a third-year archaeology student, i work part-time in a supermarket in the fresh goods section. i am an enthusiastic person, and i basically go around doing whatever i like (i often get called interesting, or weird, but in a good way). i like talking about tons of things, and can go on about a subject for hours. I can sometimes be a little bit withdrawn, or a bit daydreamy, like when i've got my music on.

well, as for looks, here's a pic: http://img704.imageshack.us/img704/6826/img2722o.jpg
I also work out regularly (cardio every morning, chest exercises in the afternoon) both to feel and be healthy, and of course to look good.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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MurdocNiccals

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Girls lose interest after a little while if the dynamic is tipped too much in their favour, i.e. you are trying too hard to impress them. Also you should take things up a notch ASAP, however you are most comfortable doing it, be it through real life or through a phonecall, or through a screen with words on it.
 

Huffman

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Looks are ok. Generally if your looks are not HORRIBLE then you can get some.

You say things start off well, so you passed the looks test already. Rest is about mindset I would say... read some of the stuff flying around here.
"I can't attract girls" is not very specific, and it's what everybody says when they get here ;)
 

kutbaf

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Huffman said:
Looks are ok. Generally if your looks are not HORRIBLE then you can get some.

You say things start off well, so you passed the looks test already. Rest is about mindset I would say... read some of the stuff flying around here.
"I can't attract girls" is not very specific, and it's what everybody says when they get here ;)
yeah, i can understand, it's just so frustrating not knowing where the **** it goes wrong
 

S0LID

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Buy a new shirt and get a haircut.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Huffman

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kutbaf said:
yeah, i can understand, it's just so frustrating not knowing where the **** it goes wrong
If you have no idea, then read some material on how attraction works. Book of Pook is good. It's the perfect newbie reading. Also Senor Fingers is good. Once you know recognize what went wrong you can start working on it.

Bout the looks: you can definitely make it more clean, you look kind of unkempt, maybe shave off the stubble. Stubbly really only looks good if it's short and dense, not long and sparse. As undergraduate student you can get away with messy hair, but in the long run you might think about it ;)
But it's not THAT bad. If you feel self conscious about it, change, otherwise keep it.

Better work on your mind.
 

RSanders219

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what's wrong with being single man? You can date multiple women at once and it's not a big deal! haha. You just gotta chat up some girls at your school and before you know it you'll be able to get multiple dates per week. Trust me dude, i've been down the path of feeling sorry for myself and all that bull.. Didn't go on one date for a year and a half or get any action whatsoever, but I read a lot on this site and in such a short time (maybe 2 months) I've all ready been talking to multiple girls at once. It's all in the attitude just be confident and collected. And definitely read all the DJ bible has to offer!
 
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