simplifying all of this

[frivolousz21]

ive been with her now for 6 months.



im saying we started havign sex at 2 months.


we were friends before that for 2 yrs.

we dated for 1 monhth 2 yrs ago...well over 2 yrs now...realized then we were at diff stages in our life...we kept in touch.

then started talking religiously for about 4 months..then met up one day in May and it took off from there.


thats not a negative observation...i know where you are coming from.

thats a good repsonse..I repsect that..

but so many people have only seen life half empty instead of half full.

if im not in love with her by now...then I might not be able to handle caring for someone more than this.

 

[WestCoaster]

It's all a crapshoot anyway ...

Good that you know her already, a foundation of friendship and trust is important, even if the LJBF is a four-letter word here and kiss of death for women (despite that women hypocritically say they want to marry their best friend).

My best friend lived with a gal for three years before marrying her, now he's terribly miserable; another good friend lived with his now-wife for four years, been married 15+ and he's miserable and a married AFC. Other guys I know got married very quickly and they're happier.

There doesn't seem to be a magic formula for marriage. Some live-in before marriages work, most I know do not; some elopements flow, some actually work; some quick engagements work, some do not.

My theory: It's all a crapshoot, you don't know what you're getting.

 

[frivolousz21]

yea everyone has diff circmstances.

when we met..we had attraction and friendship.

but at that time...she was this very conservative catholic girl..and I was smoking pot like it was water.

not a good combo.

over a period of 2 yrs..she opened up and changed..

I cleaned up and changed.then we found ourselves standing a lot closer in the middle.

and that attraction that was there..combined with the frienship.....sky rocketed emotions and it took off.

 

[Egoist]

pregnant???

:crackup:

good luck and everything. that's all i'll say, you dumbass

 

[Squid]

frivolous

I understand what you are trying to say, and you may have been flamed a little excessively, but you have to understand that nomatter how much experience you think you have, your only 23 years old. I'm not trying to demean you, it's a fact.

What you posted is nice and warm and fuzzy, but to post that to older guys who have lived as advice from a 23 year old is ludicrous and insulting to say the least. I will be perfectly blunt, how can you tell me what love is and how to have a perfect relationship when you haven't been with this woman for even a year? How does this make any sense to you? I can guarantee that you haven't seen a fraction of what many of these guys have.

I will agree with you that some of these guys are a little too jaded, certain people post the same negative comments over and over in every thread, but what you need to do is sit back, listen and separate the good comments from the crap, don't preach like you've lived for 40 years.

By the way, I wish you the best of luck, I hope things work out for you.

 

[Kaine]

Are you both in the position to be good parents?

Having a child is life changing, life is hard enough being a responsible citizen.

You need to sacrifice many of your freedoms that you take for granted now, if you can, can she?

Your view of the world becomes more long term as you grow older and mature. When you are young your relationships are measured in days... How can one be so sure based on a length of time measure in months?

Can you imagine yourself 5 years from now, 10, 15 having made such sacrifices. The both of you?

I would personally consider abortion over anything less then the very best for my child.


Kaine

 

[Nighthawk]

Congratulations! Be a good poppa.

 

[Crowes]

Originally posted by frivolousz21
why do you guys always think and look for the most NEGATIVE POSSIBLE SITUATION?

It's a fallen world bud, at 23 I didn't grasp it either.

I am not a pessimist, I'm a realist.

Life WILL teach your young ass this lesson, I assure you. But I wish you well, as I said. My gripe is actually ALOT more w/ men than women. Women are simply exploiting the opportunity men open themselves to. The fault is on the male.