*Sigh* What the hell is with all these games?

[Jhcl4000]

Had an awesome date with a girl on Tuesday. Seriously, it was a really good date - great conversation, lots of laughs, quite a bit of making out, I even kissed and bit her neck. Texted her yesterday..

Me: Hey *name*, I seem to have a bottle of wine here with our names on it.. How about you help me drink it this Sunday night?
Her: Depends on what kind of wine..
Me: Tell you and ruin the surprise? That's no fun.
Her: I don't think I can handle the anticipation :/
Me: *drum roll* ..Cabernet sauvignon!
Her: Oooooohhhh... Ahhhhhh... Wow! What time are you thinking?
Me: Ahaha around 8.

Last text (the one from me) was around 6pm yesterday. No response since then saying yes OR no.

????

 

[Who Dares Win]

Her name is on the bottle cause that bottle have to be broken on her head not cause u have to give a free drink to a cheap b1tch who doesnt even reply to a message.

 

[The_411]

Had an awesome date with a girl on Tuesday. Seriously, it was a really good date - great conversation, lots of laughs, quite a bit of making out, I even kissed and bit her neck. Texted her yesterday..

Me: Hey *name*, I seem to have a bottle of wine here with our names on it.. How about you help me drink it this Sunday night?
Her: Depends on what kind of wine..
Me: Tell you and ruin the surprise? That's no fun.
Her: I don't think I can handle the anticipation :/
Me: *drum roll* ..Cabernet sauvignon!
Her: Oooooohhhh... Ahhhhhh... Wow! What time are you thinking?
Me: Ahaha around 8.

Last text (the one from me) was around 6pm yesterday. No response since then saying yes OR no.

????

You may have had an awesome date, but never assume she did.

Your text exchange went wuss very fast. You opened reasonably but you caved.

She's already tossing negative frame on you by saying what type of wine. It's a test. She's trying to make you qualify the type of wine which how you fail the test. Her wanting to spend time with you has nothing to do with type the wine.

You then do the right thing by not giving up the wine because the type isn 't important.

However, you fold like a house of cards by telling her shortly thereafter. There's no surprise or mystery left a this point.

Then she asks for time you tell her but it's all left hanging.

Here's one way to do it.

Me: Hey *name*, I have a bottle of wine here with our names on it.. Why don't you help me drink it on Sunday night?
Her: Depends on what kind of wine..
Me: What kind?!? Are you a sommelier or wine critic? It's good and flowing and it's going to come out of a bottle? Is that good enough for you, Ms. Kathryn Kennedy
Her: I don't think I can handle the anticipation :/
Me: Well you're going to have to handle it because the only way you'll find out what kind of wine this is in my apartment at 8pm on Sunday.
Her: blah blah blah.

 

[Jhcl4000]

You may have had an awesome date, but never assume she did.

Your text exchange went wuss very fast. You opened reasonably but you caved.

She's already tossing negative frame on you by saying what type of wine. It's a test. She's trying to make you qualify the type of wine which how you fail the test. Her wanting to spend time with you has nothing to do with type the wine.

You then do the right thing by not giving up the wine because the type isn 't important.

However, you fold like a house of cards by telling her shortly thereafter. There's no surprise or mystery left a this point.

Then she asks for time you tell her but it's all left hanging.

Here's one way to do it.

Me: Hey *name*, I have a bottle of wine here with our names on it.. Why don't you help me drink it on Sunday night?
Her: Depends on what kind of wine..
Me: What kind?!? Are you a sommelier or wine critic? It's good and flowing and it's going to come out of a bottle? Is that good enough for you, Ms. Kathryn Kennedy
Her: I don't think I can handle the anticipation :/
Me: Well you're going to have to handle it because the only way you'll find out what kind of wine this is in my apartment at 8pm on Sunday.
Her: blah blah blah.

I told her because I didn't feel like having to out-wit her about a bottle of f*cking wine lol. I just wanted to set up the date.. "Went wuss" because I told her what kind of wine I was bringing? Interest level drops because I told her what kind of wine I was bringing? That sounds.. Utterly ridiculous... -_-

Not arguing, just saying..

 

[bigneil]

Interest level drops because I told her what kind of wine I was bringing? That sounds.. Utterly ridiculous... -_-

No, interest level was already low if she insisted on an '82 Lafite Rothschild in order to see you.

 

[floydb25]

No, interest level was already low if she insisted on an '82 Lafite Rothschild in order to see you.

That's what I was thinking. This girl wasn't interested in you, OP, but what you were willing to provide for her. In this case, wine. It had to be a good kind, or she wasn't going to bother. She HAD to know what kind it was before deciding. You alone weren't good enough for her, and neither was an ordinary wine with you. She sounds like a high maintenance **** who's difficult to please, and can't be satisfied with the status quo. She was also qualifying you, and put you in pursuit mode. You contacted her, you set up a date, you had to prove it was good enough for her - while she did all the deciding. She's probably a taker, as well. Chances are, she's waiting for you to contact her again, so she can maintain the control and make you do everything.

 

[Jhcl4000]

No, interest level was already low if she insisted on an '82 Lafite Rothschild in order to see you.

I just figured that was teasing at the time.

She DID pay the bill when I got up to go to the bathroom before we were about to leave though.. (my one beer and her two) That's usually not a good thing in my experience.

 

[Korrupt]

Text her tomorrow afternoon and see what's up. Her response, or lack thereof will give you your answer.

 

[loveshogun]

Text her tomorrow afternoon and see what's up. Her response, or lack thereof will give you your answer.

This.

For what it's worth, I didn't see too much worth reading into either positively or negatively in your little non-versation. Maybe she's into you, maybe not. Won't hurt you to follow up with her tomorrow and ask what's up.

 

[Robert28]

If you can ever get her to come over, have a bottle of Thunderbird, Ripple, or any type of box wine and two Dixie cups waiting on her. that'll show her ass.haha

 

[Jhcl4000]

Texted her about it today. She said: "I'm having dinner with my family tonight. I will call you when I'm done!"

 

[sighsigh]

Lol @ some people here jumping to a conclusion and just 'trying' to come up with something, absolutely anything, to explain it.

It could be anything. But it's very unlikely to be anything bad if you feel you had a good previous date. Korrupt gave the best answer. And you didn't even have to text; you could have just waited.

 

[bigneil]

It's sad when we get real time updates of text messages on the forum.

 

[Mike32ct]

Would this "wine date" have been your second date?

I agree that her interest level was marginal, but I think she got turned off when she fully realized that you were inviting her to drink at your place. In other words, she's gonna be in a position where she will probably have to put out.

I wouldn't invite a chick over quickly unless I got REALLY high interest level from her. I would have moved slightly slower with this one and maybe invited her over for date THREE, rather than two.

 

[Jhcl4000]

Would this "wine date" have been your second date?

I agree that her interest level was marginal, but I think she got turned off when she fully realized that you were inviting her to drink at your place. In other words, she's gonna be in a position where she will probably have to put out.

I wouldn't invite a chick over quickly unless I got REALLY high interest level from her. I would have moved slightly slower with this one and maybe invited her over for date THREE, rather than two.

Ugh.. This girl is turning out to just be a b!tch.. She texted me at 11 last night:

11 pm - Her: Hey I'm so sorry just got done with my family! What are you doing?
12 am - Me: Hey, had drinks with a buddy and have been chilling at his place. What nights are you free next week?
Her: Work till 11 tues-sat
Me: Let's do tomorrow night
Her: I should be free

4pm today - Me: I have a few things to get done this afternoon, so I'm thinking like 8 tonight.. That cool?

It's now 7:15 and I've gotten no response. F*ck this chick..

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

You can tell if a girl is going to flake by the response she gives. If it is anything but yes, ok, or sounds good then she will probably flake.

I should be there = I probably won't be there.
Maybe = I won't be there.
I gotta see what my plans are = I won't be there

You guys have to have a third eye and JH I'm pretty sure you seen this coming.

 

[Who Dares Win]

You can tell if a girl is going to flake by the response she gives. If it is anything but yes, ok, or sounds good then she will probably flake.

I should be there = I probably won't be there.
Maybe = I won't be there.
I gotta see what my plans are = I won't be there

You guys have to have a third eye and JH I'm pretty sure you seen this coming.

Such a simple concept yet one does not simply get it till many crappy flakes.
Rep for you pretty

 

[floydb25]

Yeah, she has low interest. It's pretty clear. Could be that you're a bit eager on seeing her, and she knows it. As soon as you contact her, or vice versa - you jump right to the next date plans. I like to let them want to see me - after building some rapport. Or set it up after its been built. Nothing wrong with talking for a little while, and having her excited to see you. Gotta build some anticipation - not just jump from one date to another. By no means does this mean talk for hours and hours.

It's kind of like meeting up with a distant friend. You'll probably talk for a little while, get reaquainted, share some laughs - then set something up. It flows naturally. Doesn't seem forced or pushy. You want to seem interested, but not over-eager.

This is a tactic users and players use, as well. They lure themselves in, and try to act all nice - like they care about you - until they get what they want. They don't just storm into your space. They make you feel comfortable first.

 

[st_99]

You may have had an awesome date, but never assume she did.

its true, some people will still be fun, happy and generally in good spirits even if they have no sexual interest in you. so yeah, you can't assume.

you may simply not be her type, you never know, maybe she likes thugs or jersey shore types, or nerds or guys with big tats,
who the heck knows..

 

[The_411]

I told her because I didn't feel like having to out-wit her about a bottle of f*cking wine lol. I just wanted to set up the date.. "Went wuss" because I told her what kind of wine I was bringing? Interest level drops because I told her what kind of wine I was bringing? That sounds.. Utterly ridiculous... -_-

Not arguing, just saying..

You missed the point. It was never about the wine or anything else for that matter.

What I was identifying for you was that her asking what type is not a good thing because she's already thinking of how to say no.

You're not trying to out wit her per se, you just can't give in so easily.

It's a sales thing. When people ask elimination questions they are basically asking you questions where they anticipate the response will be as such that they can say no I'm not interested without being upfront to begin with.

What I suggested was simply framing strength and basically giving her the message that her questioning what type of wine before accepting the invitation is rude and therefore you don't answer her question.