"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Sick of hearing about ex.

dark god

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2009
Messages
232
Reaction score
74
Location
Jersey
I dated a woman back in 2013 for about 3 months..didnt work out so just stayed friends. Now when I say friends I mean maybe once a year she or I would message each othe just to catch up. Anway I ran into her again last April, started talkin and she said she wanted to date again..I said screw it lets give it a try a again..It was slow at first but got more serious around mid september. Appearenly she dated this guy for like a year who passed away (weird medical reason) 4 months b4 I ran into her. Now heres the thing she brings this guy up at LEAST once a day. Now I understand she was hurt but its been over a year now and frankly Im tired of hearing about him. I mean if she wasnt ready to date and is still morning why get involved with me? Shes been with me for over 4 months now and Im sick of hearing his name. My question is am I being too cold hearted or am I right?
Thoughts?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Billtx49

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 23, 2013
Messages
5,989
Reaction score
5,410
Location
DFW
She’s using you as her emotional healing tampon. Once she’s done healing, you’re most likely gone. You’re right in your evaluation that she’s not ready to date yet…
Classic case of back burner guy promoted to front burner as needed.
 

dark god

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2009
Messages
232
Reaction score
74
Location
Jersey
She’s using you as her emotional healing tampon. Once she’s done healing, you’re most likely gone. You’re right in your evaluation that she’s not ready to date yet…
I will screw ur head up more: 2 months ago she tells me she had a dream about the ex and how he came to see her. When he was departing said dream she was "Babe dont go!" ...I felt like chopped liver
 

derby1

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 10, 2017
Messages
3,242
Reaction score
3,400
Shes been alpha widowed Literally,

there is a shrine setup to the guy in her head, and you will never match up to any of her idealistic views of him, where she uses her reminiscing card.

Dangerous waters, and theres nothing you can do.

Also shes taught herself she can dump you for 7 years and youll be ready to be a B/F at the drop of a hat. Believe me when I say this, women will do that forever....they will literally check in every few years, then lose interest.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

dark god

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2009
Messages
232
Reaction score
74
Location
Jersey
Shes been alpha widowed Literally,

there is a shrine setup to the guy in her head, and you will never match up to any of her idealistic views of him, where she uses her reminiscing card.

Dangerous waters, and theres nothing you can do.

Also shes taught herself she can dump you for 7 years and youll be ready to be a B/F at the drop of a hat. Believe me when I say this, women will do that forever....they will literally check in every few years, then lose interest.
How do you know she dumped me 7 years ago lol..but yea she did..dumped me hard..for another guy..yea i know Im a idiot.
 

2Rocky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
2,442
Reaction score
2,734
Age
52
How do you know she dumped me 7 years ago lol..but yea she did..dumped me hard..for another guy..yea i know Im a idiot.
So where is your backup for her now? You should have a backup/prospect/plate number on speed dial and call her before she gets the words "Goodbye" out of her mouth.....

Exes don't get second chances at monogamy...
 

Krueg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2012
Messages
1,278
Reaction score
134
Age
37
Hopefully you learned your lesson! Now time to start moving forward.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

Doctor Europeo

Moderator
Joined
Mar 6, 2017
Messages
4,428
Reaction score
4,819
Location
Mexico
I would never go back to an ex. But at least I assume you are getting a bunch of sex out of this.
 

metalwater

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
1,606
Reaction score
1,330
Location
random
You assumed wrong (hangs head)
no sex.. get out now. she is doing bad stuff to you; again. she is literally stealing more of your life.

the only type of ex that we might take back is if we dumped her. if she dumped us for another guy, we NEVER take her back. it rots our soul and kills our heart. literally. get out now.
 

dark god

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2009
Messages
232
Reaction score
74
Location
Jersey
no sex.. get out now. she is doing bad stuff to you; again. she is literally stealing more of your life.

the only type of ex that we might take back is if we dumped her. if she dumped us for another guy, we NEVER take her back. it rots our soul and kills our heart. literally. get out now.
Well Im gettin sex but not what Im used too..5 minute mediocore Bj's..standard missionary position..maybe once a day...If I didnt push the issue we would have sex like once a week like we were a old married couple.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Doctor Europeo

Moderator
Joined
Mar 6, 2017
Messages
4,428
Reaction score
4,819
Location
Mexico
Well Im gettin sex but not what Im used too..5 minute mediocore Bj's..standard missionary position..maybe once a day...If I didnt push the issue we would have sex like once a week like we were a old married couple.
You have to "push" the issue? One one hand, maybe once a day is more than you could get if you were single and spinning plates. On the other hand, the sex sound mediocre and she should want sex more or less as much as you do, otherwise, in my experience, its not gonna end well.
 

metalwater

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
1,606
Reaction score
1,330
Location
random
Well Im gettin sex but not what Im used too..5 minute mediocore Bj's..standard missionary position..maybe once a day...If I didnt push the issue we would have sex like once a week like we were a old married couple.
ok, still not perfect for all the other reasons. but I thought you meant NO sex and complete refusal.

do you want to improve the situation with who you have or find another woman? or both...?

her talking about her ex all the time and letting you know she is missing him... is not good for you. that will suck the life out of you.
 

Rakeboy

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 3, 2020
Messages
33
Reaction score
11
Age
31
Location
Manila
your a rebound, like what my main plate did to me this January. The ugly thing for being a rebound is you was used as an emotionally tampon however, you also use her for sexual gratification and thats quits! The only thing you can do is move on, improve yourself and spin plates.
 

dark god

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2009
Messages
232
Reaction score
74
Location
Jersey
You have to "push" the issue? One one hand, maybe once a day is more than you could get if you were single and spinning plates. On the other hand, the sex sound mediocre and she should want sex more or less as much as you do, otherwise, in my experience, its not gonna end well.
[/QUO
ok, still not perfect for all the other reasons. but I thought you meant NO sex and complete refusal.

do you want to improve the situation with who you have or find another woman? or both...?

her talking about her ex all the time and letting you know she is missing him... is not good for you. that will suck the life out of you.
I finally told her I'm tired about hearing about this guy..I'm mean he's been dead for a year now..if she had a problem with that then kick rocks..she shut up and stuck around..go figure
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Top