shy girl who is kind of playing games

[seabumma]

Took a girl out on a first date where we both had fun. Afterward she mentioned wanting to hang out again. I said I would come up with some ideas. Yesterday I told her that we should go do something fun after midterms are over (they will be over this coming Tuesday) to celebrate. She ended up responding with a "I'll have to see, I don't know if i'll have to go home that week or if my parents will be picking me up".

I am thinking of bringing up the idea of going out again on either Monday or Tuesday when mid-terms are officially over. This girl is starting to play some weird games, and I am thinking of being blunt with her. Should I ask her out again in the following way come next week:

"let me know if you'd like to join me [on such and such day], else I am going to make plans with other people"

OR

"let me know if you'd like to join me [on such and such day], else I am going to set up a date with another girl" (i know very blunt, this will either make her jealous, or she will tell me to **** off, or I will get ignored forever)

 

[jophil28]

Yesterday I told her that we should go do something fun after midterms are over (they will be over this coming Tuesday) to celebrate. She ended up responding with a "I'll have to see, I don't know if i'll have to go home that week or if my parents will be picking me up".

That is one of those really irritating types of replies that women use sometimes. NO counter offer from her - and you are left dangling, and wondering what to do next.

Your text suggestions are awful, BTW.

INstead, just call her and mention that you plan on going to 'XYZ' Tuesday night and she would have a great time...
IF she accepts, great. IF she hemms and hawws in a whiny, avoiding kind if way , just wish her well and hang up.

 

[seabumma]

any more input?

 

[Scars]

Jophil28 is right. You need to be more assertive. "I'm going to X on Y night. You should come." Stop suggesting ideas. Make the initiative and make your own plans and then invite her along. It makes her feel like you are 'adding" her into the social life you already have.

But for now, I would go with cold contact. This girl is being cold right now and showing low interest. Don't contact her until she contacts you. The first couple times another meet up may not even be brought up. Just talk to her and try and get her juices flowing if you know what I mean. Eventually SHE will suggest a meet up. You can either go, or tell her "actually, I'm going to X on Friday. You should come."

You made a petty attempt when suggesting a meet up. Now it's time for damage control (cold) and then trying again once her IL is back up where it needs to be.