shy girl or simple rejection?

[aerofoil]

so i took this girl out the other day, about 3 days ago. nothing physical, just for lunch. ive been talking to her off and on, meeting her in group situations for about i dunno, 2 or 3 months now? i know she is a shy girl from the way she acts and from what my friends tell me about her (they intro-ed her to me).

lunch went pretty okay, nothing great. but i do take some time to warm up in terms of having great conversation. so i asked her out again, this time for a movie. i got this.

"dont know if i can make it, made plans to see (that particular movie) with some other friends. just the two of us?"

well i replied saying that yes, it would be just the two of us. got no text in return.

what is that?

 

[The Sperminator]

Shes probably not interested just move on. I know every guys solution here is next but in this case I think that would be best.

 

[aerofoil]

hmm. i was thinking that too. is there a way to turn this around? i dont have one of those 'i want a quick ****' kind of crushes on her, actually.

 

[slickaz]

3 things:
1. sh!t testin you to see if you're needy by texting her again to check..
2. Rejection
3. She aint convinced yet, maybe ur in the zone or she too shy.

just relax and let it slide..if she text you back, dont mention it, till you meet up face to face again..then ask her on another date, face to face, with specifics sorted (time, date, place)

 

[aerofoil]

what do you mean by 'in the zone'?

 

[Chipleader]

Its a simple rejection.

 

[aerofoil]

like i asked earlier, is there a way to turn this around?

 

[ezily]

did you ask her to that movie via a text message?

 

[Igetit!]

It looks to me like it is a rejection too. There were a couple of things that gave me that impression. First, when she said that she didn't know if she could make it or not. I know that is a flat out lie. If she were really interested,she would have made an counter offer. Also,when she said that she had already planned to see that particular movie with some of her friends.
What kind of sense does that make? "Oh, well I would like to go to the movies with you,but I already how plans to see that movie with my friends. Sorry,I guess we can't go out now". Yeah,right. Plus,when she asked if it would be just the two of you alone. That sounds to me like she doesn't want to be alone with you. Every one here says that you should next her. Maybe you should,but my guess is that if you do,she'll probably start calling you just to keep getting the attention.

 

[ezily]

yeah, I guess when she asked "just the two of us?" that's a bad sign. Just next her.

 

[aerofoil]

yeah i did ask her via text message. im asian. forgive me and yes i am aware that its a flat out lie. but its weird. some additional info,

recently got out of a pretty serious relationship, and at one time i was on a rather crazy revenge kick. she knows about this. she knows the whole story.

1 or 2 weeks back she was at my house, along with some other friends for a booze session. she kept snooping. seemed rather impressed at some of the things she found, which is why i asked her out, she was giving some good signals.

when we're with other friends she does this weird eye contact thing, like looking at me and then quickly glancing away if i look back.

shes really, really shy and acts pretty awkward/clumsy with words when we talk alone. is this a good thing?

EDIT: I've got a feeling she's scared off by the revenge thing. but that was a one off. and you'd have to know the whole story to understand. you might say that revenge is never justified, blabla. all i need to know is if there is a way to turn this around/convince her im not a psycho.

 

[Igetit!]

Did she know about this "revenge thing" before you went out or after?
And also,you said that you asked her to the movies via text message and she never replied. This text that she never replied to,how long ago did you send it? And has there been any contact between the two of you since that text?

 

[aerofoil]

she knew before, waaay before. the snooping was also done AFTER she found out about it. which is what surprised me. the text was sent just a few hours ago. at about.. 1430UTC. or if you dont want to bother translating that into your local time, 4 1/2 hours ago. there were several text messages back and forth, just that she never replied to the last one. and she replied within about 10 minutes of me sending them, except for that last one.

EDIT: now see, i really don't appreciate being called a stalker. if you would've read the earlier post, you'd know that you'd have to know the whole story to understand what exactly happened and why i did it. i also did NOT multi call when there was no response. it's 6AM where i am right now, multi calling would probably land me in jail for the night. i'm not about to get into an argument here, but i am however going to take ur advice and read the DJ bible. if someone would be kind enough to tell me where i can find it, of course.

 

[Igetit!]

Well surprise,surprise. Look at that. Another case of emotion overruling logic and common sense. She knew waaaay before about you being a revenge type person,which for most people would be a red flag. Even though she knew this,she decided to go out with you anyway. Which means that you obviously generated attraction in her. Yes, this can be turned around,but it would require a great effort and self-discipline on your part. Plus,some of thing you would have to do ARE NOT easy. For example, you said that the last contact between you two was only a couple of hours ago,right? The first thing I would do is cut contact with her for at least 4 or 5 days,and I mean zero contact. I would do this to see if she would try to contact you first. Second,if she does contact you first, I would sound somewhat disinterested with her. If she suggest the 2 of you getting together,say something like,"Well,....I'll tell you what. Let's see what happens". Women lke a challenge,and by you acting aloof,she'll be more interested in trying to win you over. The DJ bible is found at the bottom of ths page.

 

[aerofoil]

she's coming to my house on friday, with a bunch of other friends. that would be a good time to do something right? the question is, what? do i ask her out again?

 

[scribblec]

she knew before, waaay before. the snooping was also done AFTER she found out about it. which is what surprised me. the text was sent just a few hours ago. at about.. 1430UTC. or if you dont want to bother translating that into your local time, 4 1/2 hours ago. there were several text messages back and forth, just that she never replied to the last one. and she replied within about 10 minutes of me sending them, except for that last one.

EDIT: now see, i really don't appreciate being called a stalker. if you would've read the earlier post, you'd know that you'd have to know the whole story to understand what exactly happened and why i did it. i also did NOT multi call when there was no response. it's 6AM where i am right now, multi calling would probably land me in jail for the night. i'm not about to get into an argument here, but i am however going to take ur advice and read the DJ bible. if someone would be kind enough to tell me where i can find it, of course.

look all the way down the page, theres links and the first link to the left is to the bible

 

[Acq]

she's coming to my house on friday, with a bunch of other friends. that would be a good time to do something right? the question is, what? do i ask her out again?

read the bible moron... dont ask her again out

show little interest in her, but show interest in her friends, especially if there are females there...

 

[Igetit!]

NO!!! Do not ask her out. I,repeat DO NOT ask her out. Do I need to say it a third time? What you want to do is demonstrate value and personality. In other words, just enjoy yourself. Laugh,talk,and have a good time with everybody. Do not focus you attention on her,focus it more on other people. I'm not saying to ignore her, but treat her as if she were a pizza delivery man delivering pizza to your house. Say hi,how are you,then when you interact with other people(especially the other girls),really laugh and have fun. This will screw with her head because she'll be wondering why you aren't all over her. If you do this enough,then she'll approach you and start trying to talk to you so she'll be like the other girl you are talking to.
But remember,NO CONTACT. Don't call her between now and Friday,and don't text her. If she contacts you,act a little distant. If she suggest a date,say,"Well'.....Let's just see what happens.You never know." If you do this,you won't have to woory about asking her out,she'll ask you out. I know this seems far fetched,but I'm 100% serious.