Showing strength and aggressive/dominant behavior without too much sexuality...

[squirrels]

I've gone from a shy, "noble" chump 3-4 years ago to an aggressive, overtly sexual a-hole. While this is from one perspective a good thing and nails me the sluts, most girls get shied away or turned off when a guy is TOO sexually aggressive. I mean, I'll escalate kino quickly...sometimes with no regard for context, and be feeling a girl up in the middle of a crowded bar within 5 minutes of meeting her. I'm only being "natural", but it's TOO damned fast for most quality women and they pull off thinking that I'm "just after one thing".

So what I'd like to discuss is ways of showing sexual strength and dominance WITHOUT being too overtly aggressive. SUBTLE is the word I'd like to focus on. What I'd like to be able to do is keep the kino mild and unthreatening, but be able to project a strong sexual presence with my words and behavior.

 

[azanon]

My first thought was more language, less kino. If you're articulate, using confident sexual language will do a lot. Ive had women go from no kino at all, to having their pants off in one minute. The kino is optional really, and probably should take a backseat to just well-spoken manly language. You just need to have them flip that switch from no to yes i'll sleep with you, and you can do that with language alone.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Think of a spectrum SQUIRRELS. On one end of the extreme is the consumate Jerk; he's the archetype of abusive, arrogant, selfish A-hole bordering on criminal if not already so. On the opposite end is the consumate Nice Guy; he's the doormat, uber AFC who'll supplicate not just to a woman, but the very idea of her before he's even involved with one.

Now think of a mid-point between these two extremes. It's my opinion and my experience that most men lean towards the NIce Guy side of the spectrum at least halfway to the extreme. This is the result of an almost unceasing and constant socialization to "get in touch with their feminine sides" by external influences - female associates (mother, sister, girlf-friends etc.), media, music, literature and even like-socialized males reinforcing this presumption.

In all of my advice I advocate leaning more towards the Jerk side of this spectrum - as you've done - but leaning too far over puts one in danger of becoming the A-Hole. The idea is to become more self-concerned and self-important (i.e. the PRIZE) without becoming selfish. Similarly, adopting the mindset of being sexually agressive is an advantage when properly applied, but taken to the extreme it makes you prone to sexual harrassment behavior. The problem you're experiencing now is learning to balance this dynamic. Most men don't need to get in touch with their 'feminine' sides, they need to get in touch with their inner A-Hole, but not become the A-Hole.

I've got news for you, all women KNOW you're only after one thing (yes, even the quality ones), the problem is you're communicating too OVERTLY to create an atmosphere of mystery and lack the art to bait them to come into your frame. You can force a woman into your frame by being dominant and OVERT (direct game for instance), but this does little to create a sense of intrigue that draws a woman into your frame. You also run the risk of having her spit your OVERTNESS back at you, but by being COVERT in your game you use lures and draw her into discovering you instead of bluntly telling her who you are. You can feed a woman the 'book of you' one chapter at a time or you can read her the synopsis off the back cover. While you might get laid by reading her the synopsis, you're more likely to keep her interested one chapter at a time.

This is similar to what I tell AFC when their on their first dates - never vomit out your life story on the restuarant table. Women want to discover you, they don't want it to be all handed over to them - that's the surest way not to get intimate with her. You seem to suffer from this same malady only your game is better.

 

[JC9]

For the Kino aspect, just don't escalate the Kino until the girl is Kino'ing you at the same level.

If you just plow through all the Kino stages and she isn't reciprocating you are just feeling the girl up and making her uncomfortable.

Use Kino like you use foreplay in the bedroom. It should be slow, varied, always progressing, and most importantly interactive.

Granted, what your doing will work with some girls. But more likely only the last call lush crowd.