"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Shouts to my homies!

D

DrBeard

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Yo!

Sendin' shouts out to my homeboys! Sorry I aint been around to give u my advice + help u out but ur favorite badboy Drbeard has been locked in jail for asaultin police officers!

I was out clubbin, mackin on some fine ass chicks and these punks came over + accused me of stealin their girls! I got in their faces and said "Fock off cos finders keeprs loosers weepers" and they were almost cryin and beggin for me not to steal their birds and I tell them "I do what I want when I want" and I told them to go and suck their own ****s!

They started getting fasty with me so I headbuted 1 of em in the nose and then elbowed the other one in the face and went crazy on their asses! Lucky for THEM the cops came in and stopped me from killin em!

They said I gotta go to jail and I said "ok pigs, but I gotta say goodbye to my chicks first". So I go over and start makin out with these 2 fit birds and start feeling the ones tits while the other is rubbin my ****. They r going crazy for me and want to do it right there but this police man comes and pulls me away and puts me in handcuffs. My girls r crying and begging for them to let me go and I get mad so I kicked the police man in the bollocks!

Then they're all comin at me with trunchons and tear gas and stuff and I'm taking em all on for ages but loads of em come and overpower me.

When I was in jail they said i was the toughest opponent they ever had! But I must do my time and so I did.

But now I am free! So gonna be hooking up with some hot chicks and gonna have me a boner fest!!

Word up!

Dr Beard
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

T

Tomatoes

Master Don Juan
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DrBeard said:
Yo!

Sendin' shouts out to my homeboys! Sorry I aint been around to give u my advice + help u out but ur favorite badboy Drbeard has been locked in jail for asaultin police officers!

I was out clubbin, mackin on some fine ass chicks and these punks came over + accused me of stealin their girls! I got in their faces and said "Fock off cos finders keeprs loosers weepers" and they were almost cryin and beggin for me not to steal their birds and I tell them "I do what I want when I want" and I told them to go and suck their own ****s!

They started getting fasty with me so I headbuted 1 of em in the nose and then elbowed the other one in the face and went crazy on their asses! Lucky for THEM the cops came in and stopped me from killin em!

They said I gotta go to jail and I said "ok pigs, but I gotta say goodbye to my chicks first". So I go over and start makin out with these 2 fit birds and start feeling the ones tits while the other is rubbin my ****. They r going crazy for me and want to do it right there but this police man comes and pulls me away and puts me in handcuffs. My girls r crying and begging for them to let me go and I get mad so I kicked the police man in the bollocks!

Then they're all comin at me with trunchons and tear gas and stuff and I'm taking em all on for ages but loads of em come and overpower me.

When I was in jail they said i was the toughest opponent they ever had! But I must do my time and so I did.

But now I am free! So gonna be hooking up with some hot chicks and gonna have me a boner fest!!

Word up!

Dr Beard
Click to expand...

Im sure thats how "ze ****" went down......You were caught mugging a granny really wernt you?

Whatever you do.....Dont "pop a cap in my ass"
 
F

Fash

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UK
Dude, are you for real???

I am almost certain that you are really just putting on the wigger act. Anyhow, getting into a fight and getting banged up over a set of HBs, (Which you didnt end up going home with) isn't anything to brag about.

By the way...

http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/2667/drbeard5jx.jpg

:up:
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

T

The Truth

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Messages
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What a badass!!!!!!

I would travel across the world to see you in action just once!!
 
C

cant think of a user name

Master Don Juan
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DrBeard said:
They said I gotta go to jail and I said "ok pigs, but I gotta say goodbye to my chicks first". So I go over and start makin out with these 2 fit birds and start feeling the ones tits while the other is rubbin my ****. They r going crazy for me and want to do it right there but this police man comes and pulls me away and puts me in handcuffs. My girls r crying and begging for them to let me go and I get mad so I kicked the police man in the bollocks!
Click to expand...
Although DrBeard's legacy experienced a minor slump when he experimented with a different brand of humour during the end of 2005 and early 2006, his latest post "shouts to my homies" sees the 'birdman' returning to his roots and doing what he does best - literary excellence.

"Shouts to my homies" is mildly reminiscent of Beard's older posts, which sees our favourite Blackpool resident having sex in public and driving recklessly through the gates of some park, ultimately ending with police involvement and possible arrest.

Many have criticised his recurring themes as being too "repetitive" and "simple", yet in the opinion of most readers, it is this simplicity that is the essence of his genius. As one avid reader summed up: "DrBeard may not write in convoluted sentences or express a desire to explore the sociological implications of his experiences, but I still think his posts are lovely- or should I say - f0ckin' luvlay".

Highly recommended reading. 4 out of 5 stars.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

T

The Truth

Banned
Joined
Jun 2, 2006
Messages
473
Reaction score
10
Just read loads of your other posts and haven't laughed so much for.....well for years probably!


Oh yeah a thumb up for the George mcfly backshot! :up:
 
R

RedPill

Master Don Juan
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Midwest America
Beard, you make Ghandi look like a child pornographer. Yo pimp skillz is unparalleled! You're operating on a whole different level... can't wait to hear the epilogue to these latest events. Hopefully you'll write a book someday. Much like women can't get enough of their trashy romance novels, I would definitely sit out on the beach reading about your legendary game.
 
B

brucevangeorge

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The Cold North.
Fash said:
Dude, are you for real???

I am almost certain that you are really just putting on the wigger act. Anyhow, getting into a fight and getting banged up over a set of HBs, (Which you didnt end up going home with) isn't anything to brag about.

By the way...

http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/2667/drbeard5jx.jpg

:up:
Click to expand...
AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!


That is SWEET!

Btw, props to Beard for another hillarious post. Can this guy keep getting any funnier by ragging on himself?

HAHAHAHA.

You should be a comedian man. A 3 foot midget who thinks he's a huge macho badass that pulls all the ladies. I would PAY to see that act. You could have your name in lights on Broadway!!! :cheer:
 
I

IsiMan84

Master Don Juan
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DFW
RedPill said:
Beard, you make Ghandi look like a child pornographer. Yo pimp skillz is unparalleled!
Click to expand...
I was seriously laughing so hard tears were coming from my eyes. And that has never happened before so that means some really funny shít!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

P

ProDJ26

Master Don Juan
Joined
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ROTFLMAO! I have never heard of you Dr. Beard! lol But Man your ****ing cool
 
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