Okay, virtually everyone has a facebook now. If you start dating a girl, and esp if she's your girlfriend, she's going to want want to add you. She may even look you up and send you a friend request out of the blue. I've got issues with mixing romantic endeavors with my facebook. Since this is such a new medium, the rules of social etiquette haven't been fully worked out. So we're trying to figure it all out.
Here is an awkward situation I've seen a bunch of times now going back to myspace. Girl is single, she meets some guy. She of course adds him as a facebook/myspace friend. Within a month or three, she's all giddy and gaga and in love. Every photo she posts is some cutesy couple photo, they're leaving all these sweet comments every day. He's commenting on all her photos. Then one day out of nowhere, you see an update that says "Jennie is now single." And you're like "oh damn...WTF happened there??" Then you see her trying to clean up and delete all his comments over the last several months and remove all the coupley photos, and untag herself from all the ones she was in. If it ended badly, she'll probably unfriend him, and then if she added his friends, family and acquaintances, she has to debate whether to unfriend them too. It's also got to be a bit embarrassing. So my feeling is leave all that sh*t off your profile in the first place. I don't want any girls I might date or even a girlfriend on my facebook. What's funny too is you can sort of tell if a breakup was a hard, heart-breaking breakup or if it's a soft "we just need some time apart but still hook up when we get horny" breakup just by looking at the facebook. Sometimes a girl changes her status to single and deletes every trace of the guy. That was a hard breakup. Then sometimes she'll change it to single and leave all the photos and the guy is still leaving comments. That means they've been downgraded from relationship to booty-call status.
On the other hand, if you are with a girl and you get serious with her, it's going to be hard to say, "I don't want you on my facebook." She's instantly going to think you don't want to add her because you're on there macking it up with other girls or otherwise hiding something about yourself from her. Then it causes trust issues. You can lie and say you don't have one, but if she can look you up or if she ever hangs around your social circle, someone is inevitably going to bring it up and be like, "oh man did you see that video I sent you on facebook??" So lying about it will backfire, then she'll really not trust you.
So what do you guys think about this? I don't think people have really worked out the rules for this stuff. Girls will inevitably want to add you on facebook if you start seriously dating them, but if we were to break up(and most relationships will eventually end), I don't want a gazillion comments left behind to have to clean up. I kind of have this issue now with a girl I was dating a year ago. We no longer talk, she has a new guy, she's not even on my facebook anymore, yet I have a lot of travel photos and stuff that she left comments on and I now see little thumbnail pics of her and her boyfriend and it's like "ugh..."
Here is an awkward situation I've seen a bunch of times now going back to myspace. Girl is single, she meets some guy. She of course adds him as a facebook/myspace friend. Within a month or three, she's all giddy and gaga and in love. Every photo she posts is some cutesy couple photo, they're leaving all these sweet comments every day. He's commenting on all her photos. Then one day out of nowhere, you see an update that says "Jennie is now single." And you're like "oh damn...WTF happened there??" Then you see her trying to clean up and delete all his comments over the last several months and remove all the coupley photos, and untag herself from all the ones she was in. If it ended badly, she'll probably unfriend him, and then if she added his friends, family and acquaintances, she has to debate whether to unfriend them too. It's also got to be a bit embarrassing. So my feeling is leave all that sh*t off your profile in the first place. I don't want any girls I might date or even a girlfriend on my facebook. What's funny too is you can sort of tell if a breakup was a hard, heart-breaking breakup or if it's a soft "we just need some time apart but still hook up when we get horny" breakup just by looking at the facebook. Sometimes a girl changes her status to single and deletes every trace of the guy. That was a hard breakup. Then sometimes she'll change it to single and leave all the photos and the guy is still leaving comments. That means they've been downgraded from relationship to booty-call status.
On the other hand, if you are with a girl and you get serious with her, it's going to be hard to say, "I don't want you on my facebook." She's instantly going to think you don't want to add her because you're on there macking it up with other girls or otherwise hiding something about yourself from her. Then it causes trust issues. You can lie and say you don't have one, but if she can look you up or if she ever hangs around your social circle, someone is inevitably going to bring it up and be like, "oh man did you see that video I sent you on facebook??" So lying about it will backfire, then she'll really not trust you.
So what do you guys think about this? I don't think people have really worked out the rules for this stuff. Girls will inevitably want to add you on facebook if you start seriously dating them, but if we were to break up(and most relationships will eventually end), I don't want a gazillion comments left behind to have to clean up. I kind of have this issue now with a girl I was dating a year ago. We no longer talk, she has a new guy, she's not even on my facebook anymore, yet I have a lot of travel photos and stuff that she left comments on and I now see little thumbnail pics of her and her boyfriend and it's like "ugh..."