Should you just say it?

[Rhino22]

Say you get a girls number or whatever. Should you eventually just be forward and say, "I am attracted to you" ?

 

[The Karate Kid]

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

never tell your feelings to a girl directly, it never works.

 

[SexPDX]

Sosuave, ASF and other seduction materials have historically been skewed towards the position that letting a woman know that you are into her is a bad thing. I assumed it was correct for a long time but it is not. Letting the woman know you are into her is a good thing, my workshop I took with Juggler in 2003 is what convinced me of that and I still agree with it.

Having said that, you have to do it in the right way and at the right time. This is where most guys screw up most things.

The exact phrase "I'm attracted to you" isn't something I normally say, but it could work depending on how it is delivered. So could "I like you" or "you know, I think you're alight." Look at my Juggler workshop post in archives where I talk about SOI's or that thread also in archives about why I don't get "rejected". I think there are several posts where I talk about how to deliver SOI's.

 

[romanticpoet]

No.

 

[nismo-4]

In English, No.

In Spanish, No.

In Russian, Nyet.

In German, Nein.

In French, Non.

In Ebonics, Hell naw!

In my language, F**K NO!

You're giving the girl the upper hand. You'd better have your sh*t together before doing this. It's better to show your feelings through your actions, and even then the wrong one can turn the girl off.

There never was a sure-fire way to get a girl unless you got good looks, you're famous/ high status, or you're rich. But there are sure-fire ways to lose a girl!

Case closed.

 

[Create Reality]

you will feel let down after saying that. i think that you are not quite sure how attractive you are to her, projecting a fear you have onto her.

as for showing too much interest, not really. most women already know you want them. whats new?

i met my gf and called her the same day i got the number. she is not a gameplayer like girls who want to know how attractive they are. point being if she likes you then you are in.

sexpdx, nice to see you around again. stay awhile

 

[katatonia]

I don't think it would be the end if you said something like that but I don't see the point in saying it. You're just sacrificing the challenge and for what? Women love you the most when they are doing the chasing.

 

[tosh]

I think it's important to stick to things she doesn't get compliments for usually.

So if you want give her a sign of interest, then you could say something like "hmmm... that actually makes sense. you're not so stupid after all!" if the girl says something that's actually quite insightful. It works best if it's genuine and it's not related to her physical look.

 

[Stéphane]

I've done this before and it worked like a charm.

 

[WC2]

In English, No.

In Spanish, No.

In Russian, Nyet.

In German, Nein.

In French, Non.

In Ebonics, Hell naw!

In my language, F**K NO!

You're giving the girl the upper hand. You'd better have your sh*t together before doing this. It's better to show your feelings through your actions, and even then the wrong one can turn the girl off.

There never was a sure-fire way to get a girl unless you got good looks, you're famous/ high status, or you're rich. But there are sure-fire ways to lose a girl!

Case closed.

Since when was saying 'I'm attracted to you' a show of feelings?

Attraction is nothing more than what it the name implies. Being attracted to someone. It's not neediness. It's not like saying 'I love you' or 'I need you' or 'I want to be with you.'

This is where the DJ Bible FAILS to educate 'internet djs' who take everything the bible says to heart.

YES, you can tell a woman you are attracted to them. YES, you can tell a woman she is sexy. And YOU SHOULD.

If you can't say these things to a woman, how can you call yourself a man?

You really think a woman is going to get up and walk away because you said you were attracted to them or thought they were sexy? It sounds to me like a lot of you have been spending WAY too much time behind the keyboard, because to me this is what being a man is ALL ABOUT.

A man who lacks confidence in himself however will NOT say these things in fear that a woman will run away. This fear is rooted in the fact that these men FEAR that the woman is not attracted to them. If you fear this, then you have already lost the battle before it has begun.

However a man who KNOWS a woman is attracted to him, can say this. He's not stating that he needs her. He's only stating that she meets his standards and she should be proud of herself. You're only stating the obvious when you tell a woman you're attracted to her. What, did you think she really doesn't know your intentions? If you aren't an AFC, she at least knows that you're attracted to her. Instead of hiding it LIKE an AFC, make it known.

This ESPECIALLY helps with women who aren't extremely attractive who need a little push. Sometimes believe it or not, women ARE insecure around men who are confident. Sometimes they DO need a little help from us as opposed to a kick in the face.

 

[Bobby Rio]

Never force a girl to like you.

By telling her you're attracted to her before you've kissed her- you're forcing her to make a decision about you.

Attraction isn't a choice.

So don't make her choose...

just work on attracting her. After you've kissed her you can tell her.

 

[Bobby Rio]

I sort of agree with the guy above me...

At a certain level- you can tell a girl you're attracted to her.

But if you're asking the question- chances are you're not on that level...

just saying...

 

[Igetit!]

Say you get a girls number or whatever. Should you eventually just be forward and say, "I am attracted to you" ?

I don't understand why you would need to say that to her.

Wouldn't the fact that you took the time to walk over and approach her,ask for her number (which is risking rejection),wouldn't all of that let her know you're interested/attracted to her?



What is your purpose behind saying that to her? What do you want her to do or say after you say that to her? You ALREADY got her number,what else do you want?



I've never said that to a woman...EVER. I've told a woman that I wanted to see her,I've ask a girl straight up,"So,when are we going out?",I remember one time I said to a girl....


me:Are you married?
her:No.
me:you have a boyfriend?
her:No.
me:Good,then we can go out.


But just to tell a girl that I was attracted to her...I don't know,I guess you can if you want to.



I just don't understand how it is you're hoping she'll respond.


You want her to say "thank you",or "I'm attracted to you too",or what?


You'd think that the fact that you're attempting to get her number/take her out ITSELF would clue her in on you being attracted to her.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Should you eventually just be forward and say, "I am attracted to you" ?


ugh. It makes me shiver with awkwardness just to think about it. Those words are creepy. If you want to compliment a girl, have at least a little subtlety. And don't reference attraction, sex, or her body. Tell her you think she might be ok, and smile about it. That is enough.

While on the subject of being direct about attraction, act like you never notice a girl's body...until she's naked. Stare into her eyes until then. The more spectacular her t!ts, then the more credit you get for talking to her face and not her boobs. Guys think that when they see a girl showing cleavage, that means she wants you to stare at her t!ts. Yes and no. She wants guys in general to stare at her t!ts, but that one special guy who actually gets anywhere in sparking her attraction will not drool over her like a horny teenager. A woman needs to think of you as different than other men, having more value in some way. This is one of those ways.

 

[DavenJuan]

BB hit it on the head..

in some cases, extreme direct can work, but its about HOW you say things, not what you say.

its not so much TELLING her that you are attracted to her, rather than helping her realize you are.

Master expressing yourself WITHOUT the use of words. IMO, this is VERY important. TELLING someone anything leaves out the interpretation, and simply put, boring.

 

[nismo-4]

BB hit it on the head..

in some cases, extreme direct can work, but its about HOW you say things, not what you say.

its not so much TELLING her that you are attracted to her, rather than helping her realize you are.

Master expressing yourself WITHOUT the use of words. IMO, this is VERY important. TELLING someone anything leaves out the interpretation, and simply put, boring.

I say you hit it on the head too with this one.