Should you ever get back with a girl after a breakup?

[Heretolearn]

I know every situation is different etc. (variables such as kids/time together/reason for breakup).

Say though you have those silly breakups when it is clear there is not enough attraction/faded whatever then you break up.

Is it ALWAYS a write off.

What are your experiences?

Eg. I have found that some I have not tried with (eg. cheaters goodbye forever) but drama as to the girls feelings/stage of her life I have tried again and........................something else emerged.

Just wonder if it is enough time to realise you both don't work at some level if you break up within the first 6-12 mths then get back together.

 

[Greasy Pig]

This was covered extensively a little while ago.

Search for something like "if a girl leaves and then comes back".
It was probably a month or two ago.
Good luck!

 

[Heretolearn]

This was covered extensively a little while ago.

Search for something like "if a girl leaves and then comes back".
It was probably a month or two ago.
Good luck!

thanks - will do

 

[Heretolearn]

everytime I search I receive an error.

Can someone post the link please.

thanks

 

[Greasy Pig]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=190802

Here man, try that.

 

[Heretolearn]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=190802

Here man, try that.

thanks - interesting thread. Would be intriguing to know an update. I.e if the prodigal gf ended up living happily ever after with the guy she returned to or if history repeated itself.

Guess it depends on the circumstances. I wonder if this is why we often have the reaction that 'this one is different' at a breakup thinking you will get back together and live happily ever after.

Spoke to the guy who used to do my job. Cool guy. 34 and was engaged to a 24 year old. Super rich, great house, $200,000 car (new BMW M3 with a lot of money spent on it), DJ in his spare time, well travelled and cool... she dumped him before the wedding. 2 months no contact and he could not stop talking about her today at lunch. Saying how she is perfect for him and should he chase her.

I am concerned history will repeat but then again, whatever makes him happy.

Your thoughts?

*no real info on why they brought up except the girl says she was 'not ready/too young'...

 

[Atom Smasher]

In my experience, getting back together after a breakup is very unlikely to work. Things can never be the same.

There are definitely exceptions, but the odds are stacked against you. The shorter-term the relationship the more likely a reuniting will work.

 

[5string]

Mrs.5string broke up with me twice before we were married. It was not because the attraction was not there, but rather she was frightened of commiting to the relationship. Simply put, she was scared.

I just let her walk out the door both times. Obviously she came back for the prize.

All is good going on 4 years. So on occasion it can work.

 

[Findog]

I know of three "successful" reconciliations:

- a friend of mine dated her now-husband seriously. They got to the looking at rings together stage and she was expecting a proposal. Then his dad died, and his grief over that, combined with cold feet, and he dumped her. They got back together sometime later and are married now.

- a lady I work with dated this guy for about 2-3 years. She says they started drifting apart towards the end of the relationship. They never formally broke up. One weekend she didn't call him and he didn't call her and they didn't speak for like a year. She contacted him a year later and they slowly restablished their relationship. They've been together another 2-3 years at this point.

- my sister and brother in law were high school sweethearts, dated for about 5 years. My sister broke up with him, they were apart for about 9 months, then they got back together and got engaged shortly thereafter. They've been married 9 years now.

But those are very much the exception to the rule. Nine times out of ten, what's broken can't be fixed and you shouldn't try.

 

[Heretolearn]

Mrs.5string broke up with me twice before we were married. It was not because the attraction was not there, but rather she was frightened of commiting to the relationship. Simply put, she was scared.

I just let her walk out the door both times. Obviously she came back for the prize.

All is good going on 4 years. So on occasion it can work.

Congratulations. So after the break ups, what was the story?

I.e how long no contact, who initiated first and how did it go?

 

[5string]

Congratulations. So after the break ups, what was the story?

I.e how long no contact, who initiated first and how did it go?

It was only a week or two both times. She just had cold feet. She turned out to be a great wife.

We're like peas and carrots now.