should it bother u if a girl u just started seeing prob has a fvck buddy shes f'ing?

[pete101]

if you're seeing a girl and coming on too strong and she wants u to take it slow should u be bothered if she probably has a fvck buddy just to tie her over till she finds a guy she wants to be in a relationship with?

the girl im seeing now i suspect has a fvck buddy cos she seems to be auditioning guys very slowly for a potential relationship. we're not at the phase where we've slept with each other yet nor even kiss closed, tho spending time with her today (not a date) just a chance encounter, when she said she was going home now and when i asked her what she was doing later she said nothing/didn't know it automatically makes me assume she's going off to get fvcked.

reason i feel this is cos her past behaviour suggests that if i ask her if shes doing anything later if its something i dont want to hear i.e. seeing another guy getting fvcked.. whatever, then i'll get a 'nothing' 'i dont know maybe' answer. its happened a few times now.

 

[Guitar_Whizz]

This girl is toying with you. She's being very indecisive and not reciprocating your interest. You're also coming at this from the wrong frame....you're chasing her, and she is not giving an inch, hence she has control of the situation. You're also scared of losing her. That should NEVER be your mindset. You should always be ready to walk away, since you now have an abundance mindset when it comes to women!

This is NOT a good position to be in! However, here is how you can turn things around:-

- Communicate to her DIRECTLY what you want from her, and be willing to walk away if she doesn't reciprocate. What do you want from her? A monogamous relationship? A fling? Casual sex? Tell her.

- If I was in your shoes with this girl, I would be inclined to say something like "Listen, I'm gonna be upfront with you. I'm looking for a girl to hook up with. I'm looking for a lover, not just a friend. Or rather, a lover who can also be a friend. You're being very wishy-washy with me about what you want from me. Let me know if we're on the same page. What do you want from me?".

- If she then gives you a wishy-washy answer, WALK AWAY FROM HER. Tell her "Ok, it doesn't sound like you know what you're looking for here. I'm not gonna waste any more time with you. My door is always open if you are looking for a lover, until then I wish you the best, take care".

.....And then you do not contact her again. You let her chase you. You wait until she calls or re-initiates contact with you, and byu doing that, you'll have set the frame that she's chasing you.

In the meantime, go out and meet other girls, so you no longer 'need' this girl.

If she doesn't contact you again, you walked away with your dignity intact.

You'll stand out from other guys by doing this. Most girls are used to guys chasing them. The harder girls play to get, the harder most guys chase. You're different....if she plays hard to get, you pull back too, making her eventually chase you.

This will sort this out. Be the MAN. Don't chase her, and don't settle for any nonsense. Unless she gives you what you want, walk away.

 

[Colossus]

If you have evidence to suspect she has a fvck buddy (and she probably does), then why waste your time? Personally I'm not interested in pursuing chicks who are actively being banged. There are plenty of girls who aren't, and you will be able to tell by the quality of their interest in you.

 

[DonGorgon]

In 2009 expecting dedication and monogamy is a sill naive waist of time. 99% of people have multiple partners and 99% of folks lie about sex, then lie about lying about it.

Focus on Fing her for as cheap as you can for as long as you can while you get other women inline for when she cuts you off.

 

[Deadly_Ripped]

Or maybe you should learn how to Fck so well that she never drops you.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Or maybe you should learn how to Fck so well that she never drops you.

Agree, but first he needs to learn how to get to the point of Fcking her, then worry about doing it well.

 

[pete101]

This girl is toying with you. She's being very indecisive and not reciprocating your interest. You're also coming at this from the wrong frame....you're chasing her, and she is not giving an inch, hence she has control of the situation. You're also scared of losing her. That should NEVER be your mindset. You should always be ready to walk away, since you now have an abundance mindset when it comes to women!

This is NOT a good position to be in! However, here is how you can turn things around:-

- Communicate to her DIRECTLY what you want from her, and be willing to walk away if she doesn't reciprocate. What do you want from her? A monogamous relationship? A fling? Casual sex? Tell her.

- If I was in your shoes with this girl, I would be inclined to say something like "Listen, I'm gonna be upfront with you. I'm looking for a girl to hook up with. I'm looking for a lover, not just a friend. Or rather, a lover who can also be a friend. You're being very wishy-washy with me about what you want from me. Let me know if we're on the same page. What do you want from me?".

- If she then gives you a wishy-washy answer, WALK AWAY FROM HER. Tell her "Ok, it doesn't sound like you know what you're looking for here. I'm not gonna waste any more time with you. My door is always open if you are looking for a lover, until then I wish you the best, take care".

.....And then you do not contact her again. You let her chase you. You wait until she calls or re-initiates contact with you, and byu doing that, you'll have set the frame that she's chasing you.

In the meantime, go out and meet other girls, so you no longer 'need' this girl.

If she doesn't contact you again, you walked away with your dignity intact.

You'll stand out from other guys by doing this. Most girls are used to guys chasing them. The harder girls play to get, the harder most guys chase. You're different....if she plays hard to get, you pull back too, making her eventually chase you.

This will sort this out. Be the MAN. Don't chase her, and don't settle for any nonsense. Unless she gives you what you want, walk away.

the only problem is if i say the door is always open for her if she wants a lover is that, she doesn't /didn't trust me that i was into her for her and was just jumping from girl to girl. our mutual friend seemed to have some strange idea that i was into her 1st then moved on to this 1. this was never true and i have no idea where this girl got that idea cos i never even called her or asked her out whereas my 1 i did.

she's wary im only after 1 thing so giving her this ultimatum isn't it going to justify in her mind i was only after 1 thing? is there a way to reword it to show that i'm interested in being in a relationship with her?

 

[Alle_Gory]

In 2009 expecting dedication and monogamy is a sill naive waist of time. 99% of people have multiple partners and 99% of folks lie about sex, then lie about lying about it.

Damn straight.

 

[xdreamz]

it just sucks you like one person they like someone else that likes someone else, the world is crazy like that..... it should bother you, i know for certain when i find something like that i get a little discouraged, but it definately won't stop me from pursuing a girl even further if i really wanted her. all is fair in love and war.

 

[The Champ]

In 2009 expecting dedication and monogamy is a sill naive waist of time. 99% of people have multiple partners and 99% of folks lie about sex, then lie about lying about it.

Focus on Fing her for as cheap as you can for as long as you can while you get other women inline for when she cuts you off.

I'll accept that at first, but after I get her I am going to let her know that if she bangs anyone else she is dumped.

 

[DonGorgon]

I'll accept that at first, but after I get her I am going to let her know that if she bangs anyone else she is dumped.

then she will hide it perfectly until she no longer wants you then you will think you "discovered" that she has been cheating...

 

[Guitar_Whizz]

the only problem is if i say the door is always open for her if she wants a lover is that, she doesn't /didn't trust me that i was into her for her and was just jumping from girl to girl.

What's wrong with that? You're a male....and you want female company. That's normal and nothing to be ashamed of. And if you don't get it from this girl you absolutely SHOULD get it from another girl.

Put it this way: if you weren't earning any money at your job, you'd quit and find a job that pays the money you need. You wouldn't feel guilty for leaving the first job just because you got a better offer.

If you're hung up about her thinking you just want ANY girl, then tell her "Listen, right now I'd rather have you than any other girl, but if you can't give me what I want I think it's best we don't take this any further, so I can start seeing other girls. You need to be honest with me about what you want from me". And then let her answer.

our mutual friend seemed to have some strange idea that i was into her 1st then moved on to this 1. this was never true and i have no idea where this girl got that idea cos i never even called her or asked her out whereas my 1 i did.

Tell the mutual friend to mind her own business! And confront the mutual friend in front of the girl you fancy if necessary to set the truth straight! Geez, these girls sound young and immature.

she's wary im only after 1 thing so giving her this ultimatum isn't it going to justify in her mind i was only after 1 thing?

Not if you tell her you're looking for a relationship. But be willing to walk away if she refuses to reciprocate, and TELL HER you'll walk away if she doesn't give you a clear answer as to what she wants from you.

is there a way to reword it to show that i'm interested in being in a relationship with her?

Tell her "I'm looking for a monogamous relationship, let me know if we're on the same page". If she can't trust you and is always wary of you, then she's not the sort of girl you want anyway. She sounds insecure and stupid. Have some standards and find yourself a girl who is less messed up in the head and who will be willing to have a monogamous relationship with you. There are plenty of girls out there who could fulfill your needs with all the hassle this chick is giving you.

 

[nightcrawler]

This is NOT a good position to be in! However, here is how you can turn things around:-

- Communicate to her DIRECTLY what you want from her, and be willing to walk away if she doesn't reciprocate. What do you want from her? A monogamous relationship? A fling? Casual sex? Tell her.

- If I was in your shoes with this girl, I would be inclined to say something like "Listen, I'm gonna be upfront with you. I'm looking for a girl to hook up with. I'm looking for a lover, not just a friend. Or rather, a lover who can also be a friend. You're being very wishy-washy with me about what you want from me. Let me know if we're on the same page. What do you want from me?".

- If she then gives you a wishy-washy answer, WALK AWAY FROM HER. Tell her "Ok, it doesn't sound like you know what you're looking for here. I'm not gonna waste any more time with you. My door is always open if you are looking for a lover, until then I wish you the best, take care".

horrible advice imo (no offense man)..this is an example of how you DO NOT talk to girls.

1.) she does not need a lover
2.) she does not need **** on the side
3.) she does not need a relationship.
4.) she does not need YOU.

why would you offer a woman a bunch of things she DOES NOT NEED?

Realize that women want to be seduced...that's all there is to it. You do not seduce women by telling them all the things you can offer her (which 99% of other guys can offer too), but rather by having them get obsessed with you. If you want this girl to stop playing games with you then wait until the right time to say something sweet/cheesy then try to kiss close her. You can go from there. If she doesn't then you can bet your ass she isn't interested, so move on!

 

[zekko]

Personally, it would bother me if she had a fvck buddy because:
a) It tends to indicate a low quality woman
b) Who the heck wants to screw some girl when some other guy has just put his nasty d!ck into her hole? Seriously.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Since, you are only dating. Dont worry about it. Just grab a condom and fvck her. Then, when the next girl comes along start fvcking her.

 

[chrisgoodrich25]

This girl is toying with you. She's being very indecisive and not reciprocating your interest. You're also coming at this from the wrong frame....you're chasing her, and she is not giving an inch, hence she has control of the situation. You're also scared of losing her. That should NEVER be your mindset. You should always be ready to walk away, since you now have an abundance mindset when it comes to women!

This is NOT a good position to be in! However, here is how you can turn things around:-

- Communicate to her DIRECTLY what you want from her, and be willing to walk away if she doesn't reciprocate. What do you want from her? A monogamous relationship? A fling? Casual sex? Tell her.

- If I was in your shoes with this girl, I would be inclined to say something like "Listen, I'm gonna be upfront with you. I'm looking for a girl to hook up with. I'm looking for a lover, not just a friend. Or rather, a lover who can also be a friend. You're being very wishy-washy with me about what you want from me. Let me know if we're on the same page. What do you want from me?".

- If she then gives you a wishy-washy answer, WALK AWAY FROM HER. Tell her "Ok, it doesn't sound like you know what you're looking for here. I'm not gonna waste any more time with you. My door is always open if you are looking for a lover, until then I wish you the best, take care".

.....And then you do not contact her again. You let her chase you. You wait until she calls or re-initiates contact with you, and byu doing that, you'll have set the frame that she's chasing you.

In the meantime, go out and meet other girls, so you no longer 'need' this girl.

If she doesn't contact you again, you walked away with your dignity intact.

You'll stand out from other guys by doing this. Most girls are used to guys chasing them. The harder girls play to get, the harder most guys chase. You're different....if she plays hard to get, you pull back too, making her eventually chase you.

This will sort this out. Be the MAN. Don't chase her, and don't settle for any nonsense. Unless she gives you what you want, walk away.

hold on here..I agree with only a few aspects of your advice here..dont chase here yes..but tell her? you got to be ****ing kidding me man....have you learned nothing here? you use actions not words..girls use words...as a man you shouldn't give a fuc and if you tell her..your being a submissive little *****..and she'll dump you..turn it around..make her ask you what it is you want from her..I hate to say it but you must try to play their game....u want an ltr..show alot of affection..then disapear..you want to **** her..be very aggresive..it all takes patience understanding and alot of cohoones to get her to submit to a man greater than herself..read the bible..let her suck a dic

 

[WaterTiger]

Why do you assume she has a fvck-buddy??? Because she doesn't LEAP into bed with you when you smile at her? Don't let insecurity cloud your game! :nono:

I think this girl is actually looking for a relationship. She's taking it slow because she wants to make sure you're not looking for a fvck-budy, or a one-nighter.