Should I take the high road

[Gammergq]

I lack emotional control I let things which should not get to me, I get strangers saying negative things about me when this happens should I stick up for myself or should I take the high road and do nothing.

 

[Rook]

Sticking up for yourself is the High Road!

I don't know what negative comments you are receiving, but damn! Remember you are a MAN, you are YOU. You don't take shift from anyone (well, if mom gives you shift, you better listen )

Just the other night, I walked into a dive bar.. a cute blonde woman says to me as I approach the bar... "Here's a tall, skinny, azzhole" (talking to two other guys). Without skipping a stride, as I walked by, I just gave a nonchalant look, and said "Well... I'm tall, so you got one outta three right". She starts negging the guy she is with about how he is tall, skinny, and an azzhole... I just kept doing my thing. Was I overtly trying to prove my worth? No. But it did get her looking in my direction for the rest of the night after her "man" left.

Mind you... this woman is drunk... at a total dive bar... -8 points there. and she was using C+F that came off as just "Bratty" as she didn't build any comfort with me first.

She was nexted by the time I even walked by her, why? self-respect.

 

[SilverSonnet]

Hell yeah rook, I'm learning martial arts, just so I can kick some ass when it does come down to it. My mentor, and other SS members said that I had low self esteem and whenever people made horrible remarks to me I would be negative for a longwhile after. Now, I couldn't care less about what people think. Dont let people define your life for you, you define your own life. And dont let yourself believe for one minute that what they are saying is true, for as you think you shall become

Here's an example:

I want to go see that new movie, never back down('cos I love martial arts) and i said I dont care if I have to go on my own. So, my friends says to me
Him: "You dont go to the cinema on your own. It's just not social"
Me: I'm here to break that mould
Him: yeah, the mould of the loner.
Anyway, a few short sentences later...
Me: So what? I dont give a fvck what other people think of me.
Him: Ok ok, chill Ben!

I was pretty smug, he may be my best friend, but that give him rights on telling me what to do.

Hope this helps, Lil' Ben

 

[SickAgain]

that movie looks so gay

 

[logic1]

Whoa, whoa

If I read the OP correct. He stated his actions contributed to the so called confortations. As he said lack of emotional control.

I would consider taking the high road as moving on and not so called (standing up for yourself, bad term in this situation) and not engaging in a argument or chest thumping type of behaviour.

You are for no reason pushing other peoples buttons and when they stand up for their selfs you mirror them. You in a way provoked it.

I think you need to get your emotions in check, this would be taking the high road.

 

[Gammergq]

Whoa, whoa

If I read the OP correct. He stated his actions contributed to the so called confortations. As he said lack of emotional control.

I would consider taking the high road as moving on and not so called (standing up for yourself, bad term in this situation) and not engaging in a argument or chest thumping type of behaviour.

You are for no reason pushing other peoples buttons and when they stand up for their selfs you mirror them. You in a way provoked it.

I think you need to get your emotions in check, this would be taking the high road.

I am not provoking anyone and I not pushing anyones buttons I go about my business and I get abuse uncalledfully.

 

[logic1]

Ok, I will go for that.

Still your post is...... mmmm.... strange. Could it be they know how you react to certain events and try and get a rise out of you ( no pun intended). They are being so called........ immature?? If so get your emotions under control, same answer. Yes, there are situations where you stand up for yourself. It all depends on what your talking about.

But you said strangers........ This is intrguing. What do you do to get reactions out of strangers??

 

[everywomanshero]

Blah every now and again someone says something weird & derrogatory, and while it can create an embaressing moment for them, it's really not a big deal. These people are their own worst enemies. If it's really, really rude, I'll just point that out by turning to someone I know and saying "Can you believe he/she just said that, anyway I was saying...." I don't like to argue with people, I don't find that is a good way to go, but I will do is turn the group against someone who is bringing us all down. This is the best way to induce conformity anyway, people will verbally and emotionally resist and individual but they will feel pressure to conform to an entire group.

 

[Mavrick]

You, my friend, are insecure. Insecure in your abilities as a man and as a person. If someone gets to you, then you're insecure. Never let 'em see you sweat. Stand up for yourself. Don't be angry. Just be the best YOU that you can be. If it's not good enough for whoever you're having issues with, get 'em out of your life. You have nothing to prove to anyone, and you don't want to be controlled by other's thoughts of you.

Control your emotions by overcoming you insecurities.

 

[DonGorgon]

lame thread.