"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Should I suggest talking on the phone?....

No Escape

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Should I suggest talking on the phone??....

I think if two people are going to talk, they should do it the right way and talk on the phone. Forget the IM bullsh*t. Isn't that what you do after you get someone's number at a bar/club?? The phone is obviously a more personal and effective way of communication. It's difficult to be on IM at the same time as another person..it can be weeks before you see that person signed on. It doesn't work out good. Instant messenger has got to be one of the dumbest inventions in internet history.

So, when i establish contact(through email) with women from these intimate encounter/dating sites, should i suggest talking on the phone instead of wasting my time on IM??
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Donald Kaufman

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IM, for the purposes of initiating human contact, is a lot like using training wheels. If you need them, you should use them. If she needs them, she will use them. They make your bike look a little girly and your friends will laugh at you but they can help you learn to ride.

And when you take them off you get to feel like a man. :cool:
 

mrmoe

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I think it depends on the girl who you're talking to. Remember, there are quite a few girls online who are there because they are shy and would rather have things move at a more comfortable pace. Some of these girls might not like the pushiness and stop talking to you altogether. I do agree talking on the phone is a much better way to connect with someone. It never hurts to ask, right? If you want to talk on the phone, just tell them straight up.
 

FratAndDiddy

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some women love letters. they enjoy reading your thoughts on screen or paper.
but in some situations the phone is the greatest so long as you dont abuse it.

do the technique youre comfortable with. nothing wrong with either one. keep in mind that typing text holds a thought much greater than a spoken word. my advice is learn to use both wisely.
 

Albion4

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You're ultimate goal is to hang out with a woman in person. IM, Phone, E-Mail, two aluminum cans, smoke signals; they're all just tools you use to reach that goal.

-Al
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Royal Elite

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Re: Should I suggest talking on the phone??....

Originally posted by No Escape
I think if two people are going to talk, they should do it the right way and talk on the phone. Forget the IM bullsh*t. Isn't that what you do after you get someone's number at a bar/club?? The phone is obviously a more personal and effective way of communication. It's difficult to be on IM at the same time as another person..it can be weeks before you see that person signed on. It doesn't work out good. Instant messenger has got to be one of the dumbest inventions in internet history.

So, when i establish contact(through email) with women from these intimate encounter/dating sites, should i suggest talking on the phone instead of wasting my time on IM??
I love to right whereas Im not a real phone person. I use them both, it all depends on time and convience. I know sometimes it just seem weird doing new things, but humans were meant to evolve,and to be a modern person I have learned to evolve with it.
 

yunghova35

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STAIRSTEPS

the phone, the IM, email there all stair steps the TOP of the steps is when you meet with her and that your point if you start from email u should be going from email to phone to meeting, if your using a phone number you need to step to a real meeting.

yes ask her for a number, *** on pen pals went out in the 80's with good saturday morning cartons...
 
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