Should I reconnect with an old Ex-girlfriend

[Rocko90]

I'm flying out to Phoenix, AZ to visit my parents. My ex lives 2 miles from my parents. I live in Florida. I will be in AZ for a week.

We broke up in 2007. So a lot of time has passed. Feelings change. She may have missed me over the years and wondered what I have been up to? Or maybe not. Exes are exes.
Anyway, we had a 1 year long distance relationship back in 2006. I met her in Florida on a business trip and we connected and stayed in touch over the years. She actually ended the relationship when I flew out to see my parents 4 years ago because she had moved in with another guy. I was hurt, but couldn't blame her. It was long distance. Things happen. It kind of ended badly and with hurt feelings on my end though. I liked her. When I got back to florida I called her up and told her how i felt and I felt upset that she would pop that up all of a sudden, etc. That I bought a plane ticket and she could have said hello to me just to be nice. I said to her "hey what goes around comes around. be good." And that was it. Never talked to her since.
I see her as a friend now since time has passed. But the memories are still there. Not looking to rekindle anything. I just want to see how she is doing in life. I dont know anyone else in AZ other than family since it is just a vacation.

She might have a boyfriend and I could care less. I looked her up online and it lists her as single. Or she is married? Who knows?

Should I send her a quick text? Something like...."Hey, its Jon, I am in California. Just wanted to say hello. It would be cool to hear from you, if not be good. see ya."

Or something like that? Dont want to sound desperate or anything.

what do you think?

 

[the_great_gaia]

Me, personally, I wouldn't. I feel that you just want to see how she's doing, and you're looking for something to do incase you get bored. I wouldn't bother with this chic, honestly. She's already showed you that another guy was more valuable to her than you were, and then she moved in with him. But if you just want to see her, and be on friendly-speaking terms, I mean, sure "why not".. But don't text her until you are there, 2 miles from her.

 

[Iceberg]

Should I send her a quick text? Something like...."Hey, its Jon, I am in California. Just wanted to say hello. It would be cool to hear from you, if not be good. see ya."

Or something like that? Dont want to sound desperate or anything.

what do you think?

I hate when people give an out. Like, "It would be nice to hear from you, BUT IF NOT, THATS OK TOO"

Just say something normal, "Hey it's Jon. I was just eating (some food she likes). Reminded me of you. How are things?"

Either she'll reply or she won't. But don't tell her "If you dont wanna talk, thats fine." Either she'll respond or she won't. Dont give her a reason to.

Anyway, the common rule is to avoid ex's. But any girl who I qualified enough to make an official girlfriend, is probably a cool chick. So if you wanna see her, say hi I guess. Just don't have any expectations.

 

[SgtSplacker]

Yeah if you had her on fbook or something you could just kinda let her know you were going to see your parents and see if she asks to see you again. But to just text her and suggest a visit would leave her on the defensive a bit. It may be a weird awkward reunion with no chance for sex.

Sure you may not want to see her for that, but one must set their goals high and go for something. Otherwise how would you know everyhting went perfectly?

 

[pdx1138]

Nothing to gain going back to an ex in my opinion.

There is a reason they are your ex.