"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Should I ever attempt a sexual relationship this girl...again?

AlmostThere!

Senior Don Juan
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Short story:

I met a girl in a party environment. We have one night stand. I call her next day. We go out on four dates. Had sex again. I get LJBF speech. I broke contact for month and half. Just came back tonight from hanging out with her (dinner and movie...we split meal, film, taxi).


Little longer story:

She told me that a traumatic event happened to her a couple years ago and that being intimate with a guy scares her and makes her feel uncomfortable. When we had sex the second time, she cried before sleeping with me. The next day, she gave me the LJBF speech and gave me two reasons why she came to that conclusion.

I cut contact for a month and a half. I recently texted her to see how her job search was going. She replied positively. I then invited her to go see a movie with me which she quickly accepted. Instead of meeting at the restaurant as planned, she said I should come over and smoke a joint with her before heading out which I agreed to.

We share a nice meal, saw the film, and we took a taxi back to my car (which was parked at her place).

During this whole evening, I did not bring up the friend's speech or make any attempt at kino. But I still would like our friendship to be FWB.

How can I transition our relationship into a sexual direction again?

My goal is to see where she stands about having sex again without ruining the friendship -- as I still want to be friends even if we don't have sex anymore. Should I start off with light kino and see how she responds the next time we hang out?

She told me since the traumatic event happened with her, when she has sex with a guy, she purposely never sees him again. So, she broke her rule by spending 5 hours with me tonight.

I think I scored points tonight by not talking about what happened a month and a half ago and by not making any moves on her.

She said "i'll be in touch", so the ball's in her court now. I made plans for us to hang out, so I'll see if she contacts me to hang out again.


What do you think of this situation? Do I have a chance at regaining a sexual relationship with her?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Jitterbug

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
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Let me guess, traumatic event = rape story?

RUN.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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