"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Should I Call? Or Blow it Off?

V

Venom

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I called this girl over the weekend, and we talked for about 15 mins, good conversation and all. I asked her when she was free and she said "whenever," so I suggested on wednesday and she said, "o.k, just let me get my schedule from work, but it sounds good"

I found out yesterday i'm working wednesday, so i texted her last night if she was available and she said she was busy tonight going riding, but asked me if i was available tomorrow.

So i texted her back like 15 mins later, Tomorrow sounds good, how about 9:30pm? and I haven't received a text back or call...

should i bounce and make plans with teh boys?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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brian123

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Id wait a bit, but then I'd try to make plans with your buddies.

I'd also try to start staying away from txt'ing.


If you make other plans, then it make it seem like you are busy even if she responds back.
 
D

DJx420

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I would say yea, make some plans with the boys. If she DOES end up calling/texting you back say something along the lines of: "I'm doing ____ with a few of my friends, I'm going to get a bite after, you should come"

You don't want to EVER ASK a girl out. You want to be doing something and invite her along...Remember your a busy man.
 
R

r0cky

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I would say yea, make some plans with the boys. If she DOES end up calling/texting you back say something along the lines of: "I'm doing ____ with a few of my friends, I'm going to get a bite after, you should come"

You don't want to EVER ASK a girl out. You want to be doing something and invite her along...Remember your a busy man.
Click to expand...
Dont say "you 'should' come". Thats will sound as if you're trying to save face.
Say instead "if you want to come by let me know" or do it in the form of a question and ask her if she wants to come along to hang out. Be sure to insert the word "want", that way it reframes it to her thinking she is going because she wants to see you, rather than she's going because you're suggesting that she should.
This one word makes all the difference.

You can ask a girl out, there's no harm in doing that. Just make it seem like you're out to have fun and you are letting her come along with you and not that your sole intention for going out is to be with her.
 
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chuchu

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Just point out that you broke two of my personal rules

First, never talk more than 5 minutes on the phone

Second, shouldn't play with the text game. Just pick up the phone and call her.

Now call her and tell her you are busy tomorrow. You can make her an offer sometime next week, but thats it if she say no then forget it, say you're busy, and have to get back with her.

Tomorrow go workout or do some field exercise, play sport, do something fun.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Venom

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thanks but i ended up going out with the boys and had a blast. I got a text at like 9:00pm saying "Heyy...im almost done work - im going home though. I have bad cramps :("

WHO SAYS THAT???? I just met this girl..LOL .. I'm not even gonna call or text back after that.

ya your right the mistake was I texted her, your absolutely right, but due to the situation it was the only way, because we originally made plans for wednesday and i had to change cause i was working so i thought i'd text monday (since we spoke on sunday) to see if she was available for that day.

anyways, im gonna cut this girl for two reasons
1) didnt give me any advance notice that she even wanted to go out
2) i think the text was pretty well planned out anyway. (its an assumption)

If shes interested the balls in her court to pursue.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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