"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Should I bother?

K

KRUT

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Hey guys. I want to ask you for some advice/feedback on something.
There was a girl in my class last semester. She seemed to like me. She gave me some IOI's including some kino. She would start conversations with me.
Anyways, I waited too long and didn't do anything but at the end of the semester I sent her this message on facebook:
"Hey ****. Do you want to hang out sometime this weekend, see a movie or something? I wanted to ask you in class but I forgot. Anyway, shoot me a message back or call me at *******. "
I got no response for her and I thought she was ignoring me but four days later I got this:
"heyyy *****!! sorry i havent been on facebook too much ive been really busy with final papers and such. im actually in a computer lab typing something up right now, its probably too late to see a movie since im going home either tomorrow or thursday but we should def hang out when we get backkkk!!

call me my number is ****** maybe we can study for out final together or something?"
I called her a couple hours later and told her that I had a final that day but we could hang out that evening. She said yes, call me after your final. I called her after, she picked up on second call. She said she still had a project to finish and that she'll call me after she finishes her project. She didn't call me that night. When I saw her at the final she said that it was her sorority sister's birthday and she had to go with them.

It's after the break now and I am wondering if she has a low interest in me and if I should even bother calling or messaging her.
Your advice will be appreciated.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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D

Dominator86

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why dont u just lay low till classes start again, ur at college man, get her drunk at a party, isnt that what you guys do anyway......get her out and drunk
 
M

MacAvoy

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Give her a call in a couple of days, I'd give her one last chance and if she flakes again, then move on to a new plate.
 
T

tsmith2334

Master Don Juan
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lay low for a week or two. don't be so eager to set-up plans again. she does seem enthuiastic to talk to you though in her replies... so i'd guess she's relatively interested.

no harm in giving it another shot next week (or when the time is right for you).
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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K

KRUT

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When I call her should I ask her to the movies or just to hangout or to a dinner date? There isn't a whole lot to do in out town besides that...
 
M

MacAvoy

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It doesn't matter what you do, if she is interested in you she'll do whatever you suggest. However when you do call her, have something concrete that your asking her to do, don't say want to hang out some time, be firm, give a date & time.
 
T

The Deacon

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MacAvoy said:
It doesn't matter what you do, if she is interested in you she'll do whatever you suggest. However when you do call her, have something concrete that your asking her to do, don't say want to hang out some time, be firm, give a date & time.
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This is good advice. From what you're saying, she sounds quite fickle. Her interest level could actually be high (or just fluctuating like typical teenage girls). Call her up and ask her out somewhere with a specific date and time, she'll probably agree to it. If she doesn't her IL isn't high enough.

Just keep asking. Contrary to common DJ and PUA lore, persistence isn't bad. Assuming that you're not creepy/desperate.
 
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