Should I ask for her help?

[DrPhysique]

A few months ago, I asked a friend out and she ended up giving me the, let's just be friends talk. I really didn't care because I only asked her because I thought she was giving me ioi's and I hadn't started learning about women. Anyways, we're still friends and we still play music together when I have the time.

Thing is, I saw her with a friend yesterday and I thought her friend was pretty hot. Should I try to get her help in order to get her friend, if so, how?

The reason I'm asking this is because it's actually happened to me a few times and I didn't know how to proceed. haha

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I dunno. Going directly through her about her friend might have a negative impact on your game.

It really depends on the context. If she sees you as some poor shmuck who didn't have enough of that "IT" factor to woe her, then why would she pass you off to her friend?

If it just didn't work out, but you guys are tight and she respects you, then sure, it might be worth looking into. Better to leave her out and just game the friend on your own, though. Her first impression of you will be better than the old girl's impression that she'll obviously pass along to her friend and bias the situation against you.

 

[DrPhysique]

I dunno. Going directly through her about her friend might have a negative impact on your game.

It really depends on the context. If she sees you as some poor shmuck who didn't have enough of that "IT" factor to woe her, then why would she pass you off to her friend?

If it just didn't work out, but you guys are tight and she respects you, then sure, it might be worth looking into. Better to leave her out and just game the friend on your own, though. Her first impression of you will be better than the old girl's impression that she'll obviously pass along to her friend and bias the situation against you.

Well, yeah, after that happened, we still hung out and jammed together. I actually talked to her about how I understand how relationships work now. We talked for a while and she didn't seem weirded out.

It's just that both of them aren't really people I see regularly every day. I usually call up this girl and we organize a jam or something. I don't see them often at uni. I figured I could get to talk to her friend at least. She could could also let me know how she's like so I can be prepared, I guess. Or if I even want her. haha

 

[Mike32ct]

I'm gonna be cynical here and suggest that you try to pick up this chick without saying anything or any assistance.

1. Women don't like to be fixed up. The more one person tries to set her up, the more she is repelled by the guy.

2. Your friend may not have any interest in setting up her friend with a guy that she doesn't personally think is F-able.

3. Even if your friend genuinely wants to help you, once the other girl finds out you like her, she may get scared off.

From what gather, your a fit athletic dude. You should do just fine without help.

 

[Mike32ct]

I mean don't need help from your friends. Obviously we'll help here if you need it.

At the risk of pegging the cynicism meter, I have YET to meet a female (in person) that genuinely wants to help a guy up his game and succeed with a female and/or several females.

We have a few decent female posters here, but I've never personally met any females that were of help in this area.

 

[DrPhysique]

I mean don't need help from your friends. Obviously we'll help here if you need it.

At the risk of pegging the cynicism meter, I have YET to meet a female (in person) that genuinely wants to help a guy up his game and succeed with a female and/or several females.

We have a few decent female posters here, but I've never personally met any females that were of help in this area.

I'm pretty sure I wouldn't let her know that I think she's hot. It would only be a "I'm chilling with my friend and we happened to meet her friend." I dunno, like a kick-starter.

Also, my friend is taking a ridiculously easy physics course semester and asked me to tutor her. If her friend takes the course, I might be able to tutor her, too. Should I try that?

 

[BillieAnn]

If you make sure that you do not want anything with her, ask her for her friend then! Good luck!

 

[Mike32ct]

I'm pretty sure I wouldn't let her know that I think she's hot. It would only be a "I'm chilling with my friend and we happened to meet her friend." I dunno, like a kick-starter.

Also, my friend is taking a ridiculously easy physics course semester and asked me to tutor her. If her friend takes the course, I might be able to tutor her, too. Should I try that?

I don't see any harm. Tutoring can show higher value. But don't dress like a nerd. Wear something that shows your athletic build. Be the hot athletic guy who happens to be smart, not the nerdy guy. You want her to secretly check out your arms and chest while you're explaining the Work Energy Theorem lol.

It helps to make learning/teaching fun too. Some playful teasing can be good too.

 

[DrPhysique]

I don't see any harm. Tutoring can show higher value. But don't dress like a nerd. Wear something that shows your athletic build. Be the hot athletic guy who happens to be smart, not the nerdy guy. You want her to secretly check out your arms and chest while you're explaining the Work Energy Theorem lol.

It helps to make learning/teaching fun too. Some playful teasing can be good too.

Yeah, I'm actually that kind of guy so it's not a problem. I also dress very well and get compliments on my clothes all the time, so no need to worry about how I dress. lol

Also, I'll be making the people I tutor pay, so it's not like I'm offering a free AFC service and letting them use me.