You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
The responses:
How about the fact that this happens to 10-20% of men, and he wants to be prudent? :trouble:
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
^This.sodbuster said:
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Bingo! Men have as much right to knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt as women do. If it were up to me all children would be paternity tested at birth. Or at least I'd require a valid paternity test before any man's name could be entered as the father on the child's birth certificate. That alone would go a long way to preventing paternity fraud.sodbuster said:
??? Dude, you don't have to get the mother's DNA. All you test is the kid and yourself.Down Low said:
You don't. I can only guess he doesn't fully understand how paternity tests work. You swab the kid, then your self, put the swabs in the respective containers, one for child and one for "father", and send it into the company. 1-2 weeks later you get an email/letter notifying you of the results.MatureDJ said: